Dispute With Sibling Re Selling Inherited Property

Keep_pedalling

Logan2525 said:

diego_94 said:

Most of what you have written is irrelevant, unless your mum changed her will (which she didn't) then its 50/50

You cant legally force her to sell her share to you, the will clearly states 50% of the house is for her and cannot be changed. Why ar you so hestitant to send 5 years worth of banks statements? What are they going to show that she could use as ammo?

Ultimately you both need to be on the same page on what you want to do. If you do not agree, all that will happen is that most of your inheritance will be swallowed up with legal fees with no real benefit.

If I were you i'd bite the bullet, sell the house and use it for a deposit on another place. It seems from what you day your sister is going to find a fault with anything. With some people you cant win.

Also of course we are only getting one side of the story.

I have no issue about the house being split 50/50, I was only attempting to add context to the situation.
My mum wouldn't have wanted her to have the states when she was alive, so I feel I have to respect that now she is dead. There is nothing in the accounts I am aware of that she could use as ammo. 

If I bite the bullet and sell, granted I will have approx. £160k to use against the purchase of another property. I want to move into the family home, as agreed initially with my sister.

This is from the will, would I be able to request my inheritance as an asset i.e. the house and the remainder in cash?

"To     settle the entitlement of any beneficiary, in part or in whole, by payment in cash or by the transfer of a specific asset or assets to the beneficiary or to the legal guardian of the beneficiary with power to require the beneficiary or any such guardian to accept such asset or assets at such value or estimate of value as the trustees in their uncontrolled discretion shall deem fair and, subject to any of the foregoing provisions, to set apart and appropriate specific investments or    assets to represent the whole or any part or parts of the share or shares, prospective or otherwise, of any beneficiary hereunder at such valuation as the trustees may in their sole discretion determine, so that thereafter the particular share or shares shall have the full benefit and the whole risk of the appropriated investments or assets."

There are always three sides to a story.

In your opening post you said the house was worth £130k and that there are £200k of other assets with a small amount going to her children.

There are ample assets in the estate once the grand children’s legacies have been distributed to split the estate 50/50 without the need for you to buy your sister out. You get the house + £20k and your sister gets £150k cash. This is the simplest option, but first you need to sit down with her to sort out the current state of distrust that currently exists. Get copies of the bank statement to her prior to meeting.

If all else fails just sell it split the proceeds and get on with the rest of your lives. I am sure she will be happy to do the above once you have reassured he4 that there was nothing dodgy going on with your mother’s accounts. After all she is not going to want things getting so bad that you leave your estate to the local cats home instead of her children.

Savvy_Sue

Surely your sister, as an executor, could just ask the bank for the statements herself?

I feel that you have to get over "mum wouldn't have wanted". You didn't help mum do what she wanted (change her will) because you wanted to do right by your sister. Fair play to you, but you can't pick and choose: you're bound by the will.

Point out that you had no involvement in mum's finances, but why withhold the information?

diego_94

Logan2525 said:

The solicitor has advised me as joint executors, I need to agree to her requesting 5 years of bank statements. Mum was of sound mind and dealt with all her finances independently. I had no access to mums accounts. The whole thing about statements came out of the blue.
Thanks for everyone's comments.

No reason to withhold them then. Like others have said you have inadvertently caused this situation. Stop going to solicitors for advice (which will rack up heavy bills) and work this out with your sister.

pjs493

I think the mistake you made was not sharing the five years worth of bank statements with your sister. This was a reasonable request, and assuming everything is above board I can't see why you would refuse to share these with her. As you are both executors of the Will she had a right to these just as much as you did.

She rightly feels like you've got something to hide, even if you haven't, so she feels that any trust she had in things being above board has gone. I can see why she feels upset and wants to gain some control back and no longer wants to deal with you directly. It is entirely her decision to list the property on the open market, as you say, she isn't legally obligated to sell to you. I think the best course of action, if you want to gain her trust back and see if she will reconsider selling her share to you, would be to apologise for not sharing the statements and provide her with copies of them and anything else she asks for that is a reasonable request.

She may feel that given what you have done, she'd rather have the extra expense of selling through an estate agent because she feels she doesn't owe you any favours. It sounds like its more of a matter of principle for her, rather than being interested in saving a few grand by selling to you directly.

BooJewels

I'm sorry that some of the replies sound a bit brutal and almost certainly not what you wanted to hear, but being an executor and bereaved child comes with some difficult problems to overcome.

Having now executed several wills in short order, along with clearing houses etc. the one aspect that is quite jarring is that there are no longer any secrets - you will find out things that you wish you hadn't and see things you'd prefer not to have.  Unfortunately you won't always be able to protect your Mum's privacy in the way she did in life and I think you just need to share the bank statements with your sister.   If you say that you've not even seen them yourself and you've done nothing wrong anyway, there's simply no reason not to.

Your Mum put you in this position to some extent, by not formalising a will reflecting her latest wishes.  So not having done so, you just need to honour the one that exists and make the best of it.

I also suggest what was mentioned earlier - if there's a house worth £120k and £200k in cash assets, you take the house and £40k and your sister has £160k as cash (although does the original will that stands also mention £15k each to the grandchildren?).  You're both coming out of it quite well, equitably and getting the outcome your Mum stated that she wanted - you living in the house, mortgage free.

bobster2

An executor really should review 7 years of bank statements prior to the date of death - to check for gifts that could form part of the estate. As joint executors you share responsibility so should both be looking at these.

As an executor - your sister could obtain these directly from the bank. So you might as well give her copies.

Logan2525

BooJewels said:

I'm sorry that some of the replies sound a bit brutal and almost certainly not what you wanted to hear, but being an executor and bereaved child comes with some difficult problems to overcome.

Having now executed several wills in short order, along with clearing houses etc. the one aspect that is quite jarring is that there are no longer any secrets - you will find out things that you wish you hadn't and see things you'd prefer not to have.  Unfortunately you won't always be able to protect your Mum's privacy in the way she did in life and I think you just need to share the bank statements with your sister.   If you say that you've not even seen them yourself and you've done nothing wrong anyway, there's simply no reason not to.

Your Mum put you in this position to some extent, by not formalising a will reflecting her latest wishes.  So not having done so, you just need to honour the one that exists and make the best of it.

I also suggest what was mentioned earlier - if there's a house worth £120k and £200k in cash assets, you take the house and £40k and your sister has £160k as cash (although does the original will that stands also mention £15k each to the grandchildren?).  You're both coming out of it quite well, equitably and getting the outcome your Mum stated that she wanted - you living in the house, mortgage free.

Thank you for your reply and also for the way you have worded things, it has put things into perspective for me.

As you mentioned, I was only trying to protect my Mum's privacy, as she had done herself. With hindsight, that was not the correct thing to do as it has put me in the position I currently find myself in.

Thanks again for your reply.

Logan2525

bobster2 said:

An executor really should review 7 years of bank statements prior to the date of death - to check for gifts that could form part of the estate. As joint executors you share responsibility so should both be looking at these.

As an executor - your sister could obtain these directly from the bank. So you might as well give her copies.

I wasn't aware of the 7 year rule, as the solicitor dealing with the estate hadn't mentioned this. The solicitor also advised that the statements can only be requested if both executors agree. I was only doing what I thought my Mum would have expected me to do, but realise I have mis-judged things.

bobster2

Logan2525 said:

bobster2 said:

An executor really should review 7 years of bank statements prior to the date of death - to check for gifts that could form part of the estate. As joint executors you share responsibility so should both be looking at these.

As an executor - your sister could obtain these directly from the bank. So you might as well give her copies.

I wasn't aware of the 7 year rule, as the solicitor dealing with the estate hadn't mentioned this. The solicitor also advised that the statements can only be requested if both executors agree. I was only doing what I thought my Mum would have expected me to do, but realise I have mis-judged things.

It's not so much a "rule" - but it's usually recessary to ensure that an estate is administered correctly and to avoid personal liability.

So you haven't seen the statements yourself? It would be reckless to administer and distribute the estate without seeing them (due to possible IHT).

If your mother gave you some sort of substantial gift in the past that you'd prefer that your sister didn't see - don't worry this will not alter the distribution of the estate. If the will says 50/50 the assets in the estate now get distributed 50/50. E.g. this would not be altered by the fact that your mother gave you £50k five years ago.

Logan2525

bobster2 said:

Logan2525 said:

bobster2 said:

An executor really should review 7 years of bank statements prior to the date of death - to check for gifts that could form part of the estate. As joint executors you share responsibility so should both be looking at these.

As an executor - your sister could obtain these directly from the bank. So you might as well give her copies.

I wasn't aware of the 7 year rule, as the solicitor dealing with the estate hadn't mentioned this. The solicitor also advised that the statements can only be requested if both executors agree. I was only doing what I thought my Mum would have expected me to do, but realise I have mis-judged things.

It's not so much a "rule" - but it's usually recessary to ensure that an estate is administered correctly and to avoid personal liability.

So you haven't seen the statements yourself? It would be reckless to administer and distribute the estate without seeing them (due to possible IHT).

If your mother gave you some sort of substantial gift in the past that you'd prefer that your sister didn't see - don't worry this will not alter the distribution of the estate. If the will says 50/50 the assets in the estate now get distributed 50/50. E.g. this would not be altered by the fact that your mother gave you £50k five years ago.

Thanks for clarifying, I will catch up with the solicitor on Monday. She just gained authority from both of us to contact the bank and get the balances including interest at the date of death, to allow her to apply for Confirmation. There was no mention or suggestion we should be checking back for 7 years.
No, I haven't seen any statement either, it isn't something I even thought of. I was of the mind that it wasn't my business to look over Mum's finance while she was alive.
Mum was always fair, if she gave to one, she gave the same to the other so there was no gift apart from her transferring money at Christmas rather than giving it as cash.