Money gifts for children

belfastgirl23
belfastgirl23 Posts: 8,023
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Traditionally I’ve bought gifts for nieces and nephews. However over the last few years we’ve gone from only having a few to having 10 under the age of 10 and since there are a glut of birthdays between now and Christmas the shopping is getting to be too much (and parents are always grumbling about how much stuff the kids have). I’m thinking of moving to money gifts for them but I don’t really know what the going rate is and of course if you ask people say not to worry about getting anything. £30 doesn’t sound like a lot per child but by the time you take in Christmas and birthdays that’s well over £500 a year. And there are a few older ones as well that we mark special birthdays, graduations etc for so it all adds up. Anyone got any guidance? Would be very grateful for any experiences or thoughts…
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  • elsien
    elsien Posts: 32,235
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    edited 22 October 2023 at 8:01PM
    30 quid is more than I spend per child for nieces and nephews, and way too much for a child under 10, in this family anyway. It’s about what you can afford.
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  • HampshireH
    HampshireH Posts: 4,394
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    edited 22 October 2023 at 8:39PM
    My budget for any niece/nephew is £15 but if I can get a bargain I absolutely will and get it nearer £10

    £30 is a lot. I hate giving money to kids. I've a rule no cash under 13. Kids should embrace being kids and I feel that cash/vouchers make it so boring and less personal
  • Brie
    Brie Posts: 9,211
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    I don't buy anything for neices/nephews.  frankly they were horrified when I made them scarves/hats and begged not to have anything further.  I've taken them at their word(s) and haven't gifted them anything in the last 15 years.  Much easier for me, much happier for them.  I'll start giving them back family things over the next 40 years - the family sterling silver cutlery, grandma's pearl necklace - all that carp.
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  • Robin9
    Robin9 Posts: 11,955
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    Out of the bunch you've got some that have graduated ?   Time to stop giving to those - they will be out there working.
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  •  I hate giving money to kids. I've a rule no cash under 13. Kids should embrace being kids and I feel that cash/vouchers make it so boring and less personal
    From a parent point of view. We get a lot of items, birthday, Xmas, visits.. to the point that the kid ignores the toys as there is too many of them. I would extremely appreciate cash gifts - as it could be used towards nursery costs, swimming classes etc.

    Maybe have a chat with parents and see what they actually need? Cash as a gift may sound boring, but you could label it as some sort of experience like swimming classes/trip to theme park and give parents the money?
    Or even suggesting taking a kid for a few hours away - costs nothing but both parents and kid would enjoy it!

    Regarding the value - it's all really down to how much you can afford, if £30 is too much - give less, sometimes it's fine not to give anything - just come and visit. I would prefer to get £0 from someone who I know that is struggling financially than actually any money/gifts from them.
  • maman
    maman Posts: 28,374
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    We give money gifts (£20 currently) to those children under 18. The older ones will know the value and what they want to spend it on. We tell the parents of the younger ones to buy something/treat them as they see fit. Some choose to put it in savings accounts.

    I think that unless you talk to parents in advance about what's wanted/needed then money gifts are the best option. Also if you don't live locally then delivery can be an issue although I have arranged for gifts to be delivered from Amazon etc when parents have advised me what's needed. 

    How much to give will depend on financial circumstances. 
  • Jami74
    Jami74 Posts: 982
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    £30 doesn’t sound like a lot per child 
    It sounds a lot to me! I think if I had that many it would be a tenner each and maybe a little something for under a fiver like some sweets or glow sticks or bake-your-own fairy cakes or something, because it's nice having a little something to unwrap. Unless you're really rich, no-one is going to make judgements on the value of the presents you give.
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  • olgadapolga
    olgadapolga Posts: 2,263
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    Have you considered giving them premium bonds? 
  • Robin9 said:
    Out of the bunch you've got some that have graduated ?   Time to stop giving to those - they will be out there working.
    The older ones are tapering off, I keep it going until around graduation/age 21 but at that stage as you say they are grown up. 
  • belfastgirl23
    belfastgirl23 Posts: 8,023
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    edited 23 October 2023 at 6:56PM
    Thanks everyone for the comments.  I am doing the money thing to try to get away from gifts mainly for myself really if I’m honest - it is a LOT of shopping and it’s hard to buy anything for under £15 without a lot of thought. I know because I’ve tried. And some of parents are not happy with sweets being bought, some aren’t keen on plastic, some have other kids where choke hazards are an issue etc, so even beyond what will the child like and what do they not have there is a lot to take into account. I also have done a mini-canvass of parents and have the sense they would be happy with money as gifts, but it’s trickier to ask how much in case some pitch it above what I’m willing to spend. I have a budget of £100 a month towards gifts (Christmas and birthday) so based on that spending £50 overall per kid per year would be ok. 

    Based on that, I will mostly give them £20 each and buy a book as a small gift - I can always get a good book for less than £5. I also realised that not all of the kids are the same and I don’t necessarily need to treat them as such - as long as I keep an equivalence on each side of the family it’s ok. There are just two kids on one side of the family and I can run to £30 for them, especially since they don’t have a bunch of other aunts and uncles to buy for them. All of these perspectives have been really helpful, that’s Christmas more or less sorted :) thank you!
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