Birthday dinner went wrong

thorsoak

If it is person (2) who has the next birthday, why don't the pair of you arrange to have dinner together and each pay of the other (if you understand what I mean) and leave it at that.

Malthusian

thedr said:

Interestingly I received a message from person 3 yesterday saying how odd it was that this guy had booked a holiday because he’d been claiming to be strapped for cash. 

I remain confused as to why you both think it odd that someone who has made a large expenditure has less money to spend on something else.
It was a tradition, not a contractual obligation. He should have been honest before your birthday that he couldn't afford to keep it up, but people are really bad at honesty, especially when money is involved.

MattMattMattUK

This person is no longer a friend, their behaviour demonstrates that, just let them drift away from the rest of the group as they obviously have no desire to maintain the friendship. 

Doodles

Sounds like for him, the friendship has run its course I'm afraid to say.  His behaviour indicates he was not happy to be there.  I bet if you started to not include him, he wouldn't be too bothered so just concentrate on your friends that are there for you.

liney

It sounds like he wants to spend his money on other things, so next time, just pay your own tab. And when he is invited and has an excuse, then leave it at that - it means he doesn't want to attend. Sorry. 

Flugelhorn

liney said:

It sounds like he wants to spend his money on other things, so next time, just pay your own tab. And when he is invited and has an excuse, then leave it at that - it means he doesn't want to attend. Sorry. 

so long as he doesn't turn up for his own birthday and expect the other 2 to pay for him

Pollycat

Flugelhorn said:

liney said:

It sounds like he wants to spend his money on other things, so next time, just pay your own tab. And when he is invited and has an excuse, then leave it at that - it means he doesn't want to attend. Sorry. 

so long as he doesn't turn up for his own birthday and expect the other 2 to pay for him

That's exactly what people like that do.

ouraggie

I was in a similar tradition with two friends. Each time, the birthday girl didn’t pay and the other two got the bill. I then didn’t see them for absolutely ages as i got a new fella. They carried on socially, with just the two of them. When it was one of thems birthday, the other one texted me ,after about 6 months of no contact, to see if i wanted to join the birthday meal. Funny how i got invited to that but not all their cinema trips, etc.