Removing myself from a joint account

My partner and I are separating, and I want to unlink our finances.  The main link is a joint current account, which I am happy for him to keep (including the contents of it), but wish to remove my name from it.  For this it appears I need his signature, which I'm unlikely to get as there has been a complete breakdown of co-operation from him.  Does anyone know if there is a way around this?  It's a Santander account.

Thanks so much!  Life's hard enough at the moment without additional stress!
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  • elsien
    elsien Posts: 32,294
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    Ask the bank to freeze it. Then when he needs the money, the deal is that you get your name taken off first.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
  • Give the call centra a ring I'm sure you're not the first person in this situation
  • eskbanker
    eskbanker Posts: 29,918
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    You can't unilaterally withdraw from the account but should be able to instruct the bank to treat the account as being in dispute, which would effectively prevent its use by either of you - this is a drastic option but if you alert your partner to your intention to do this then you might find him amenable to resolving the matter more constructively.
  • All banks require the consent of all parties to the account as any credit or debt becomes the responsibility of those left behind. Processing is often not instant so in theory you could submit the request then empty the account, max out the overdraft and leave it to your ex to pay. 

    Its certainly worth ensuring it does happen, there is another thread on here recently from someone who signed the forms and gave it to their ex assuming they'd signed and submitted them but now has defaults on their records because their ex never submitted and ran into financial difficulties post separation. 
  • SueC_2
    SueC_2 Posts: 1,673
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    southone said:
    Give the call centra a ring I'm sure you're not the first person in this situation
    My call is very important to them..... I am held in a queue...... and will probably have died by the time I reach the top of it..............
  • SueC_2
    SueC_2 Posts: 1,673
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    elsien said:
    Ask the bank to freeze it. Then when he needs the money, the deal is that you get your name taken off first.
    eskbanker said:
    You can't unilaterally withdraw from the account but should be able to instruct the bank to treat the account as being in dispute, which would effectively prevent its use by either of you - this is a drastic option but if you alert your partner to your intention to do this then you might find him amenable to resolving the matter more constructively.

    I was really trying not to do anything so 'confrontational'.  He's not nice when angered, and freezing the account will only anger him.  I could understand needing his permission if there was debt that needed to be jointly settled, but there's actually quite a healthy balance in there - which he is welcome to, I just want my freedom!  It seems ludicrous not to be able to just remove myself and leave him to the account and the funds.   :'(
  • SueC_2
    SueC_2 Posts: 1,673
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    All banks require the consent of all parties to the account as any credit or debt becomes the responsibility of those left behind. Processing is often not instant so in theory you could submit the request then empty the account, max out the overdraft and leave it to your ex to pay. 

    Its certainly worth ensuring it does happen, there is another thread on here recently from someone who signed the forms and gave it to their ex assuming they'd signed and submitted them but now has defaults on their records because their ex never submitted and ran into financial difficulties post separation. 
    It just makes me want to weep.  I understand what you're saying, but really, in this day and age, someone can't, at the press of a button, cancel my debit card and online access?  Really?  I'm pretty sure they could if they wanted to. 
  • elsien
    elsien Posts: 32,294
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    edited 26 September 2023 at 1:03PM
    They can cancel your debit card and online access but that wouldn’t remove your responsibility for any debts run up on the account. That’s why your name needs to come off completely and needs your ex consent.

    You don’t need to go nuclear straight away. Is there someone that you are both talking to you could act as go-between? Then if he continues to be an idiot and refuses, on his own head be it.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
  • SueC_2
    SueC_2 Posts: 1,673
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    elsien said:
    They can cancel your debit card and online access but that wouldn’t remove your responsibility for any debts run up on the account. That’s why your name needs to come off completely and needs your ex consent.

    You don’t need to go nuclear straight away. Is there someone that you are both talking to you could act as go-between? Then if he continues to be an idiot and refuses, on his own head be it.


    There is currently no debt though, so if they would allow me to remove my name from the account, and at the same time cancelled my debit card and online access, any future debt wouldn't be down to me.

    I don't really want to get into the personal aspects of our break up, but expecting him to be reasonable regardless of who speaks to him is utterly futile.  And 'on his own head be it' loosely translates to 'and brace yourself for seven shades of !!!!!! to be hurled at you in return'.

  • eskbanker
    eskbanker Posts: 29,918
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    SueC_2 said:
    There is currently no debt though, so if they would allow me to remove my name from the account, and at the same time cancelled my debit card and online access, any future debt wouldn't be down to me.
    Which is how (and why) the dispute/freeze option works....
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