unacknowledged gifts.

kesyery

I have been sending small amounts of money in birthday cards to my family in Australia for decades now.  I NEVER have an acknowledgement from the adults and only very occasionally from the grandkids.  I have told them I need to know the money has arrived but I always have to prompt them.  I don't need gushing thanks, just "got it".  I am now going to stop this habit to see if they notice.  I really want the students in the family to have the money and would give more if i thought it was appreciated.   How do I get them to  txt me with.  "Cash arrived. Thanks"

eskbanker

That's nothing to do with holidays and travel planning (the subject of this board), so you might attract relevant comments if you post on a more suitable board such as https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/categories/marriage-relationships-families

Misslayed

Move requested

Pollycat

kesyery said:

I have been sending small amounts of money in birthday cards to my family in Australia for decades now.  I NEVER have an acknowledgement from the adults and only very occasionally from the grandkids.  I have told them I need to know the money has arrived but I always have to prompt them.  I don't need gushing thanks, just "got it".  I am now going to stop this habit to see if they notice.  I really want the students in the family to have the money and would give more if i thought it was appreciated.   How do I get them to  txt me with.  "Cash arrived. Thanks"

The kids have obviously learned from their parents.
I'd have stopped sending money long ago.
It only takes a few seconds to type out a 'thank you' text.
If someone can't be bothered to do that for someone who remembers their birthday, they don't deserve any money.

oldernonethewiser

Two things. 

No acknowledgement, stop sending

Cash in an envelope through the postal service, don't do it. 

prettyandfluffy

It's rudeness, plain and simple.  Stop sending it and see if there is any reaction.

MrsPorridge

Stop sending it!  There is no way I would send presents or card if no acknowledgment of thanks.

HillStreetBlues

Always happy to thank anyone who donates to me.  Nudge Nudge

maman

MrsPorridge said:

Stop sending it!  There is no way I would send presents or card if no acknowledgment of thanks.

Personally, I wouldn't necessarily expect acknowledgement of a card only but still expect it for a gift. 

I agree, it must be a family thing. In ours, the parents have always encouraged the children to write thank you notes. Many still do but others have replaced this with a call or text message over the years. 

What disappoints me a little is when parents acknowledge the gifts on behalf of older (able to write/use a phone) children which suggests they know what their children should be doing but are happy to 'let them off'. I think this is symptomatic of their parenting though.

Agree that cash shouldn't be sent through the post but I'm sure that's not the only reason for wanting acknowledgment. 

tightauldgit

kesyery said:

I have been sending small amounts of money in birthday cards to my family in Australia for decades now.  I NEVER have an acknowledgement from the adults and only very occasionally from the grandkids.  I have told them I need to know the money has arrived but I always have to prompt them.  I don't need gushing thanks, just "got it".  I am now going to stop this habit to see if they notice.  I really want the students in the family to have the money and would give more if i thought it was appreciated.   How do I get them to  txt me with.  "Cash arrived. Thanks"

I probably take a different view to most but if you really want the kids to have the money then what does it matter if it's appreciated or thanked or whether the adults acknowledge it or not? If you're genuinely doing it to help them and you want them to have it then that should be enough reward without having any further confirmation. 

If it's just about a security thing and checking the money has arrived stop sending it by post and just set up an electronic means to deposit the money into an account for them. Sending cash by post isn't really very clever anyway. 

On the other hand if you really feel the kids don't care if they get the money or not and don't appreciate it and it's not doing any good then stop sending it. There's plenty of charities who will be happy to take your money and I'm sure will always email their thanks! 

london21

Easy, stop sending it.