My friend is rude and ignorant

MikeL93

So me and my best friend have been friends since primary school but over the last few years he's become rude and ignorant. There have been many examples of how he's been recently but I think this is the worst one. We have season tickets to our rugby team, I drive to every home game and the majority of the away games we go to. I pay for a season parking pass at the start of every season and not once has he offered to split the cost 50/50 with me. He never offers to drive to any games and he never offers to share the petrol if we go to an away game that involves a fair bit of travelling.

On top of this every time we go to a game he texts me saying "what time are you picking me up?" even though me driving to pick him up means then having to drive back past my house to go to the rugby. And numerous times I've said "I'll pick you up at 12:30" for example he'll reply and say "can you make it 12:45 as I won't be ready then?" even though I've given him plenty of hours notice as to when I'll be picking him up. But even then when I do arrive at his house at the time he has dictated it takes him another 10 minutes or so to leave the house. In the past when I have asked him where he's been he has said stuff like "Oh I jumped in the shower at 12:30" or "when you text me 5 minutes ago saying you was on your way I went the toilet and ended up watching YouTube videos whilst I was sat down." That to me is hugely disrespectful. 

And then when we get to the stadium he'll very often drink 6 pints during the game, I only have one tops but most of the time I will just have a coke to drink and when he's going to the bar and I ask him to get me a drink he says "give me your card then." Completely forgetting the fact that I drive and pay for parking.

What should I do? How should I approach this?

Devongardener

Just tell him all the points you have raised here!

stuhse

Id suggest this is not your friend you are just being used. You are his free taxi so he can enjoy a drink.

MikeJXE

There are friends and there are real friends 

He's neither he's a sponger 

Emmia

I suggest you go to the rugby without him, if he wants to go he'll need to arrange his own transport

turnitround

Next time you are going to a match send him a message saying you are already out and near the ground so he will have to make his own way there to meet you.  Stop being a mug.

thegreenone

I think my first would be to say "I have an appointment on Saturday morning, times are going to be tight so if you want a lift, you need to be at my house at 12.30 on the dot".  If he doesn't turn up, go without him.  If he does turn up with his car, when he goes for a second pint, remind him that his car is at yours and you're not driving him home.  See what happens and go from there.  Your bank account is not his.  Or "car problems, you'll need to drive this weekend".

Pollycat

I think you need to understand the definition of friend.
The person you describe is not a friend.
He is a user.
Either explain to him how you expect him to behave or cut him out of your life.
Well...that's what I'd do.

stuhse

So you've read the comments all in the same vein.  I think the best idea is before the next match , have a reason why your car is not available....book it in for a service, lend it to your mum, whatever.  Ask him to drive and pick you up. See if he does, see if he asks for fuel money, parking money.  Take it from there.

MikeL93

Thanks everyone, I think what I am going to do is when we go to the game this weekend if he keeps me waiting in the car when I turn up for him I am just going to drive off. I won't drive to the stadium I will just park around the corner or something and wait for him to text me asking where I am. If he does I'll say something like "I was fed up of waiting for you so I went the shop" and then if he does it again at the next match then I will drive off.

Pollycat

MikeL93 said:

Thanks everyone, I think what I am going to do is when we go to the game this weekend if he keeps me waiting in the car when I turn up for him I am just going to drive off. I won't drive to the stadium I will just park around the corner or something and wait for him to text me asking where I am. If he does I'll say something like "I was fed up of waiting for you so I went the shop" and then if he does it again at the next match then I will drive off.

Isn't that somewhat passive-aggressive?

Why would you not want to take more positive action against this 'rude and ignorant' (your words) so-called friend?