Process to force a sale help please

monty-doggy

Hello after a long drawn out battle with my ex (house at final stages of repossession) her dad has paid off her arrears to buy her some time and stop the mortgage company from evicting her.
so now I need to look at how to force a sale as she is refusing to release me from the mortgage and house.

background is:

house bought in 2006 we were married by then. she left in 2007. We own as joint owners.
in sept 2008 I moved my new partner in and my ex went ballistic. So she literally moved herself back in January 2009.

me and my new partner found a new home immediately (thanks premier inn!) and eventually rented a new house. 

We divorced in 2012 but didn’t get a financial order as there was only the house to sort and as I was paying all the divorce costs I just couldn’t afford it. I agreed she could stay there until the children of the marriage were 18 as long as she kept up with the interest only mortgage payments. I didn’t pay half as I was paying £950 a month to rent a house suitable for me and my children who stayed with me 3 nights one week and 4 nights the next and the mortgage was only £230 a month interest only. (She could easily afford)
min addition to this I paid her £450 a month child maintenance. (More than CSA calculations)

she moved her new partner in around 2010 then re married in 2016. I didn’t force a sale at that point but did ask them if they would remove me from the mortgage and house (at that point I offered it for free) and they said no. Neither of them have ever worked so they needed me on the mortgage to keep the house. I made it clear (and in writing) that by forcing me to stay on I would be wanting 50% when it sold as I have no way of buying a house myself as I’m trapped. 

Over the years she has missed many many payments and the mortgage company got a possession order March 2019. She’s just by the skin of her teeth managed to stay there with her dad paying off the arrears. Recent events include the house being put up for sale after she asked my permission but she was demanding 100% of the equity. She’s now saying she doesn’t want to sell. 

My youngest child is 18 in February next year. Would I be granted an order for sale? She has a 9 year old son with her new husband living with there. Would I be forced to wait until he is 18 even though he’s not my son?

do I need to give her some warning that I will be seeking an order for sale next year?
to be honest the thought of going to court and the expense is making me ill but I can’t go another 10 years stuck on their mortgage as by then I’ll be too old to make a house purchase myself as won’t be able to get a mortgage. 

Thanks for reading the long waffle!

GDB2222

There is a divorce forum, and you’re better off asking there. Or, a helpful moderator may move this post.

I’m by no means an expert, but I would guess that the answer to your questions is that you are entitled to half the equity, and you only need to wait until your own child is 18. 

I would definitely give warning before starting legal proceedings to force a sale, as the courts expect you to do that, and also there is no point going to court if you can negotiate a reasonable settlement.

RAS

Given how long it takes to get an order for sale, and enforce it, you could easily expect your youngest to have completed their education by the time you get the order for sale. And moved out before you can enforce it. 

Do search here for stories. I think it took one woman 4 years to extract her abusive ex, so she could sell up.

How do you get on with the youngest? If possible, talk to them and explain you are not trying to make them homeless, or disrupt their exam prep, but it's going to take a long time to achieve, so you need to start now

TBagpuss

You need to make an application for a financial order within your original divorce proceedings. Assuming that you haven't remarried in the mean time you should be able to do so.

hen the court has to look at the whole picture, including any prior agreements, and decide what's fair. They can look at any assets that either of you have now, although of course the length of time that you have been separated will also be relevant.

It's highly unlikely that your ex wife's younger child would be relevant. The court has to take into account the needs of any children of the family - that means children who re children of both of you, or children who were treated by both of you as part of your family. So had it been a child from a *previous* relationship of hers who lived with you when you were a couple, then his needs would be relevant (although still would not automatically mean that the house couldn't be sold) 

Start the process now. It may or may not be completed before Feb of next ear but could include an order that the house would be marketed as soon as your youngest is 18, or on their completing their secondary education (if later)but could also include a provision for it to be marketed immediately if she fails to make any monthly payment due under the mortgage in full and on time (that ideally should mean that over the period until it is sold, payments are made appropriately and this starts to repair some of the harm done to both your credit records by the earlier defaults) 

monty-doggy

RAS said:

Given how long it takes to get an order for sale, and enforce it, you could easily expect your youngest to have completed their education by the time you get the order for sale. And moved out before you can enforce it. 

Do search here for stories. I think it took one woman 4 years to extract her abusive ex, so she could sell up.

How do you get on with the youngest? If possible, talk to them and explain you are not trying to make them homeless, or disrupt their exam prep, but it's going to take a long time to achieve, so you need to start now

Wow I didn’t realise it would take that long. He won’t be homeless anyway as his mum will receive half the equity which is around £70k so she can look to buy again or rent. 

If she doesn’t co operate and I able to ask that some of the costs are split between us?

monty-doggy

TBagpuss said:

You need to make an application for a financial order within your original divorce proceedings. Assuming that you haven't remarried in the mean time you should be able to do so.

hen the court has to look at the whole picture, including any prior agreements, and decide what's fair. They can look at any assets that either of you have now, although of course the length of time that you have been separated will also be relevant.

It's highly unlikely that your ex wife's younger child would be relevant. The court has to take into account the needs of any children of the family - that means children who re children of both of you, or children who were treated by both of you as part of your family. So had it been a child from a *previous* relationship of hers who lived with you when you were a couple, then his needs would be relevant (although still would not automatically mean that the house couldn't be sold) 

Start the process now. It may or may not be completed before Feb of next ear but could include an order that the house would be marketed as soon as your youngest is 18, or on their completing their secondary education (if later)but could also include a provision for it to be marketed immediately if she fails to make any monthly payment due under the mortgage in full and on time (that ideally should mean that over the period until it is sold, payments are made appropriately and this starts to repair some of the harm done to both your credit records by the earlier defaults) 

Why would we need a financial order? She cannot make any claim from me because she’s re married and I don’t want to make a claim from her just the house 50/50

a financial order is going to be another expense that I just don’t have the money for. I have almost no disposable income left at the end of each month after paying living costs and child maintenance. I’ve literally lived hand to mouth so that they can live there all this time. 

When I left the house I took on all the joint debt and paid it all off. I left her the contents of the house, furniture white goods etc so as far as I can see there’s no reason for an order as the law states the house is joint owned?

I’m at my wits end with it all. 

RAS

Read TBagpuss' response as well. That might make it easier, as you are enforcing an agreement.

theartfullodger

There is iirc guidance on CaB (citizens advice) and Shelter websites.  Good luck.

RAS

A financial order does not need to be expensive. If you can DIY and get her to agree, you only need to get a solicitor to check the wording before submitting. So a few hundred.

Check wikivorce re the financial settlement, most advice there is free. I'd suggest based on your comments that you need to be explicit that you took on all the non-mortgage debt, as that would be off-set against any claim she might try asking for more than 50%. And paid more than the CMS requirement. 

You do need to try mediation. Yes another cost, but maybe you need to reduce your maintenance to CMS levels to fund it.

1. If she co-operates, you get a third party to witness what she agrees to, and to acknowledge the limits of what she might expect. That makes it harder for her to muck around later

2. If she refuses to co-operate, it goes against her.

monty-doggy

RAS said:

A financial order does not need to be expensive. If you can DIY and get her to agree, you only need to get a solicitor to check the wording before submitting. So a few hundred.

Check wikivorce re the financial settlement, most advice there is free. I'd suggest based on your comments that you need to be explicit that you took on all the non-mortgage debt, as that would be off-set against any claim she might try asking for more than 50%. And paid more than the CMS requirement. 

You do need to try mediation. Yes another cost, but maybe you need to reduce your maintenance to CMS levels to fund it.

1. If she co-operates, you get a third party to witness what she agrees to, and to acknowledge the limits of what she might expect. That makes it harder for her to muck around later

2. If she refuses to co-operate, it goes against her.

My solicitor has confirmed that under the marriage act she cannot ask for more than 50% of anything because she is remarried. 

I have offered mediation 2 weeks ago and
she refused. 

I think I’ve been more than reasonable I just need to get my name off this house now it’s like a noose around my neck! 

monty-doggy

Would I have to have a financial order in place before forcing a sale?