Downsizing from family home?

babyblade41

ProDave said:

I would NEVER downsize from a detached to a semi or terrace.  Once you have got used to no noise from neighbours, and perhaps more importantly YOU can make noise in your own house without fear of annoying a neighbour, then it would be a VERY backward and limiting thing to go back to being joined to a neighbour.

Rather than downsize much, assuming you are now retired, I would look at the possibility of moving to a cheaper and possibly nicer part of the country, e.g we moved from Oxfordshire (over priced and over crowded imho) to the Highlands where we got a very much better house for very much less money and much more scenery and places to do things.

I live in Oxfordshire and the prices are ridiculous, where I Live is in the South East in a very rural village where are road to our house is a bridle way .. The centre of Oxford is a hell hole 

jonnydeppiwish!

GDB2222 said:

We are grappling with the idea of selling the home we have brought up the family in for the last 25 years, and buying something much smaller and more manageable for our dotage.  

The problem is that we are used to fairly large rooms, and smaller just seems very small. Besides that none of our furniture will fit. 

And, of course, we are still very attached to this house after all this time.  So, brain says one thing, and heart says another.

I’m sure lots of other people have been through this journey. Any advice, please? 

 If you did downsize, how much of a percentage reduction did you manage? We have been looking at houses less than a third of the size of the current one, and maybe that’s a step too far? 

We went from 1600’ to 900’, 130’ garden to 30’. It felts so small initially (still a bit) so we changed the small bedroom to a changing for one of the bigger rooms.

Garage converted into a study and utility room, though this only lasts 5 months until I took the dividing wall out and made one larger and more useful space.

So much less cleaning, gardening (we both work full time), and we’ve renovated to what we want - large walk in shower, open plan living diner kitchen (still not a large space), and got rid of the dreaded conservatory to make the garden bigger (east facing so conservatory was only useful for about 3 hours a year…..).

The other pluses? No mortgage, holiday when we want them, buy what we want (though we’re still frivolous with spending), money to help the kids out with their house deposits, and 800 metres from the shore so we can wheel the paddle boards to the water.

Oh, and so much less worry about most things regarding a property!

mi-key

I think we tend to expand to fill the space and number of rooms we have, when in reality we can probably live in a much smaller space quite happily. If the kids have left home there is no reason to have a huge family kitchen / diner or have more than one full bathroom.

Maybe do some studies on how much time you spend in each room during a typical week?. That way you can see which space is essential, which you would like to have, and which isn't really needed.. Combining the use of two rooms into one can also be useful if both people dont really use them both at the same time.

ProDave

So what is the need to "downsize"?

Is it to really reduce space?  Or is it to get so a size of house you can afford to heat the whole house?  Or is it to release money for your retirement?

We have actually "downsized" over the last few years.  The new house is not actually much smaller but it is less bedrooms (3 instead of 5) but larger bedrooms.  But a big motive for us was energy efficiency.  We achieved that by self building to a very high standard, almost passive house standard.  And we have ended up with a house that is always warm everywhere, no cold corridors, indeed no heating needed at all upstairs, with an EPC rating of A94.  Sadly you will be unlikely to find anything built that good even as a developer new build today.

Murphybear

TripleH said:

My mum downsized from a 6 bed house to a 2 up 2 down.

She hates it, BUT it is rented whilst she looks around for somewhere she likes.

It has been a shock but also has helped her get perspective. She was looking for a generous 4 bed house when she sold but is now aiming for a 2 double 1 single bed house as she has a better understanding of what she needs.

There is no point having rooms that are sat empty (that you are paying to heat) if they are used only 10 nights a year, think of rooms that have multiple uses.

Also use this as a time to declutter, you can cut down on excess furniture now and gradually and save on moving costs than pay to move furniture you don't really need or use

We downsized from 4 bedrooms and 3 reception rooms to 3 bedrooms and a living room.  The small bedroom is colloquially known as the “junk room”.  I don’t understand why people are paying to heat unused rooms, we just turned the radiators off in the unused rooms.  

Murphybear

youth_leader said:

I had to sell our children's family home when my husband died, and I do have an emotional link with it.  It was a 5 bed 264 sq m listed grade II and I didn't have the money to maintain it as well as finance the large bills.   I was isolated there and do miss the privacy and space I had, and my Aga, but felt I needed to 'future proof' my life as neither of my kids live nearby.  I am glad the new owner has the money to renovate the house, although it seems plans still aren't approved.  I was sorry to see the bat roosts will be disturbed. 

I downsized to a 100 sq m bungalow without any storage at all and it feels like I'm in a caravan, but I'm determined to make it work.   The bungalow is easy to maintain and to clean with much lower bills and the garden is manageable.  Neighbours are pleasant and I've got involved in 'street events' - we had a Jubilee party, and are planning a 'Coronation' party.  Really lucky I moved at 62, three years later out of the blue I've developed a few health conditions.  

I’m sorry to hear of your health conditions, I hope they are manageable.  We moved from a narrow 3 storey house to a bungalow with a gorgeous garden a few years ago.  Bungalow living was wonderful especially as I had a bad knee.  I still miss it but we had a major lifestyle change and moved from Northants to Devon.  Sadly the bungalow couldn’t go with us.  

lookstraightahead

mi-key said:

I think we tend to expand to fill the space and number of rooms we have, when in reality we can probably live in a much smaller space quite happily. If the kids have left home there is no reason to have a huge family kitchen / diner or have more than one full bathroom.

Maybe do some studies on how much time you spend in each room during a typical week?. That way you can see which space is essential, which you would like to have, and which isn't really needed.. Combining the use of two rooms into one can also be useful if both people dont really use them both at the same time.

I think this is really sound advice.
Some things I have come to realise being the 'sandwich filling' age with elderly parents and children who have left home:

- a stairlift can often be the solution to stairs. My dad had one fitted and it's served it's purpose. It means you don't need everything on one floor (usually) if and when it's needed.
- kids will make do and probably not be home quite as often as you think. We go to DD more than she comes back as she's busier  (I suppose this depends on situation).
- less space can be less stressful. Less space is becoming quite fashionable (or only having the space you need plus a bit) there are some interesting proverbs on this. 

- move now and you can then forget about it and get on with the rest if your life. A friend of mine is doing that - she doesn't want to ponder for years about whether she should or shouldn't.
- less space means you can alter things and see a bigger impact more quickly. Perhaps affording better quality.
- if you've got equity left over you can enjoy it. 

Murphybear

jennifernil said:

Our present house was built to our  design  back in 1988.  The insulation we had put in is only now being caught up on in the  building regs, we chose everything ourselves, so are not really keen to move elsewhere.

We probably should have done so about 10 years ago, as we feel it would be too much hassle now.  We have done a bit of clearing out in the loft, but our hearts are not really in it.

The house is quite big, a total of 280sq m, plus a 40 sq m integral double garage.    We have a lounge/dining room, dining kitchen and  toilet upstairs,  and a utility room, box room (OH's workroom), 4 double bedrooms, and 2 bathrooms downstairs.   Also upstairs is the "granny flat", my Mum stayed with us for 13 years, which has a lounge, dining kitchen, double bedroom and bathroom......about 1/4 of the total floor area of the house.

It is not particularly separate, we now use it as just part of the house.  The lounge is now my study and sewing room, the kitchen is just extra storage space. Bedroom and bathroom useful for guests.

Since both our children left home years ago, 2 of the downstairs bedrooms have been repurposed into a study for OH, not that he uses it much, and a library with a double sofa bed for guests, not that we get many.

The third, smallest, bedroom, still has a bed, but has become a winter storage area for our caravanning equipment, so using it as a bedroom is not easy.   We just have far too much "stuff"!

It is definitely true that you just spread out to fill the available space! 

When my Mum died, 22 years back, we considered moving, but could find nothing we really liked, and decided to stay as we knew the house and that it  was well built.

Now, we (age 74 and 80) would consider moving to a smaller bungalow, as stairs are starting to become a problem, but as said above, the rooms are just far too small, especially the lounge, for our much loved and good quality furniture.   Kitchens are also small and not to our  liking.  In fact everything is just too small!  We could go  with fewer rooms, just not smaller rooms.

So it looks like we will be staying and adapting the house to our needs.  We have already redone 2 bathrooms to remove the baths in favour of  easy access showers, 
and have also replaced the boiler and updated the control system.

I just need to get OH to take tidying his rooms seriously, he is a serial hoarder, and very untidy.

Does he have a twin?  Or is it a “man thing”?  

GDB2222

Why do we want to downsize? 

Mainly to simplify our lives and reduce outgoings. We went from two cars to one, when I started working from home, and that’s halved the admin as well as the cost.  We barely use the car, anyway, now.

 We are not great ones for having the builders in, as we hate the disruption, so we have done practically nothing to the house for the last 25 years. So, downsizing would be an opportunity to buy something in good condition, so we don’t need to worry.

It’s been helpful hearing what other folks have compromised on. Downstairs, we would like a large kitchen diner, and a small sitting room. Oh, and a loo! Frankly, we could do without the sitting room.

Sadly, when these houses were built, they were not built with kitchen diners in mind. 

mi-key

GDB2222 said:

Why do we want to downsize? 

Mainly to simplify our lives and reduce outgoings. We went from two cars to one, when I started working from home, and that’s halved the admin as well as the cost.  We barely use the car, anyway, now.

 We are not great ones for having the builders in, as we hate the disruption, so we have done practically nothing to the house for the last 25 years. So, downsizing would be an opportunity to buy something in good condition, so we don’t need to worry.

It’s been helpful hearing what other folks have compromised on. Downstairs, we would like a large kitchen diner, and a small sitting room. Oh, and a loo! Frankly, we could do without the sitting room.

Sadly, when these houses were built, they were not built with kitchen diners in mind. 

Do you really need a large kitchen diner? Considering you won't be cooking for lots of people, and if there are just two of you, do you actually sit and eat in the kitchen for every meal, or would a small table in the sitting room be more comfortable? particularly as you get older ( sorry for assuming 'we' means you and your partner.. ) Or even a small table in the kitchen

I think kitchen diners are great for families where a parent may be doing the cooking while the kids to their homework at the table, then all eat together, but for an older couple I imagine the kitchen is one of the least used rooms in the house unless one is a very keen cook ( I tend to prefer eating while watching TV on the sofa anyway )

When I bought my house there was a sort of breakfast bar / table along one wall of the kitchen. I couldnt see myself ever using it as the living room is huge, so has plenty of space for a full dining table at one end. I ended up taking it all out and putting cupboards in its place, which makes the kitchen which is smallish a lot more practical