Downsizing from family home?

babyblade41

I downsized but wouldn't sacrifice my detached status

youth_leader

I had to sell our children's family home when my husband died, and I do have an emotional link with it.  It was a 5 bed 264 sq m listed grade II and I didn't have the money to maintain it as well as finance the large bills.   I was isolated there and do miss the privacy and space I had, and my Aga, but felt I needed to 'future proof' my life as neither of my kids live nearby.  I am glad the new owner has the money to renovate the house, although it seems plans still aren't approved.  I was sorry to see the bat roosts will be disturbed. 

I downsized to a 100 sq m bungalow without any storage at all and it feels like I'm in a caravan, but I'm determined to make it work.   The bungalow is easy to maintain and to clean with much lower bills and the garden is manageable.  Neighbours are pleasant and I've got involved in 'street events' - we had a Jubilee party, and are planning a 'Coronation' party.  Really lucky I moved at 62, three years later out of the blue I've developed a few health conditions.  

TBagpuss

GDB2222 said:

We are grappling with the idea of selling the home we have brought up the family in for the last 25 years, and buying something much smaller and more manageable for our dotage.  

The problem is that we are used to fairly large rooms, and smaller just seems very small. Besides that none of our furniture will fit. 

And, of course, we are still very attached to this house after all this time.  So, brain says one thing, and heart says another.

I’m sure lots of other people have been through this journey. Any advice, please? 

 If you did downsize, how much of a percentage reduction did you manage? We have been looking at houses less than a third of the size of the current one, and maybe that’s a step too far? 

I think part of it may be to think about how you use the space and what you might be able to do with a smaller over all space.

My previous house was a 2 up, 2 down terrace, but it was built in the 70s and so while the house as a hole was small, the rooms were fairly generous (2 double bedrooms, a big living/dining room and a small kitchen, so the main bedroom, and the living space, where you spend most of the time, were pretty spacious. 

When my parents downsized they did end up with a little less space 3 bedrooms plus a tiny box room instead of 4 bedrooms and a small box room) but the downsizing was mostly outside - they have a small garden but not the 1/2 acre plot the previous house had , and they also looked at the relative sizes of the rooms - so now, they have one big bedroom with en suite, and the other bedrooms are smaller, which is OK because they are mostly only used for guests (and the box room, which is too small for a full length bed, is a craft stash) In the old house, all the bedrooms were of much the same size as each other, which is great when you have  lots of kids and it feels fair to everyone, but less important when everyone has grown up and left home! 

I think how much you are downsizing does make a difference, and if you are moving to a much newer property then often they are designed to get more, smaller rooms, so looking at slightly older but still fairly modern properties may be the way forward to get the larger room size but still without ending up with loads of maintenance. 

(That was the other change my parents made, from a 200+ year old property to one which is mostly only about 60 years old.

BungalowBel

GDB2222 said:

We are grappling with the idea of selling the home we have brought up the family in for the last 25 years, and buying something much smaller and more manageable for our dotage.  

The problem is that we are used to fairly large rooms, and smaller just seems very small. Besides that none of our furniture will fit. 

And, of course, we are still very attached to this house after all this time.  So, brain says one thing, and heart says another.

I’m sure lots of other people have been through this journey. Any advice, please? 

 If you did downsize, how much of a percentage reduction did you manage? We have been looking at houses less than a third of the size of the current one, and maybe that’s a step too far? 

We lost a bedroom, a dining room and a cellar but gained a nicer area, bigger kitchen, larger garden, a drive  and got a bungalow instead of a terraced house with no parking.  Price was similar to the one we sold.

Old house terraced, with three double bedrooms, new house semi with two double bedrooms.  We've since added a conservatory and a garden studio.  Both near shops/buses etc.

As regards furniture - a lot of ours didn't fit so we just bought new.  We've never been attached to furniture.

badmemory

Since I have been retired I would actually like to upsize, which is not happening without a serious lottery win.  I need at least another toilet & preferably a shower too as my DS still lives with me & even if he didn't I would love a downstairs loo as being older has not improved my bladder (sorry for TMI there).  I always worry when people talk about a serious downsize because what do you do when your children move out of area as so many do, can you only have one to stay at a time?  If I had more than one I think that would worry me quite a lot.  But not everyone would feel the same obviously.  I do think that some serious thinking about how to manage life in the future is a good idea.  Things like stairlifts & other things that will make independent living so much easier.  Room to store a wheelchair or electric vehicle & to charge that sort of thing.  Better to think BEFORE you need it than wonder how to make it work afterwards.

ProDave

I would NEVER downsize from a detached to a semi or terrace.  Once you have got used to no noise from neighbours, and perhaps more importantly YOU can make noise in your own house without fear of annoying a neighbour, then it would be a VERY backward and limiting thing to go back to being joined to a neighbour.

Rather than downsize much, assuming you are now retired, I would look at the possibility of moving to a cheaper and possibly nicer part of the country, e.g we moved from Oxfordshire (over priced and over crowded imho) to the Highlands where we got a very much better house for very much less money and much more scenery and places to do things.

movilogo

Downsizing is always hard, whether it is a house or a car

One way to overcome the issue to go to a rental accommodation for sometime which is really tiny. Then buy something bigger than that and your brain will register it as an upgrade, which will keep you happy.

Alternatively, start throwing out your stuff which you don't need. We have a tendency of hoarding stuff which is well beyond its use by date - either because of inertia or sentiment. Once you get rid of your stuff you will be surprised you can have a decent lifestyle with minimal items.

GDB2222

bouicca21 said:

@GDB2222  How big is the place you have?  Can you afford to run it? How adaptable is it if you develop mobility problems in the future? Would you have to move far from friends?  It’s not easy to make a new social circle when you are older.

Personally I hate the idea of downsizing.  I like my space. I like having a dedicated study and a spare room. I like having room to keep my clutter.  I’d happily go from a 3 bed to a 4 bed if I could afford it.  All my similarly single friends have 3 bed places, one has 4 beds. None of us could face living in a smaller place unless it was absolutely necessary.

The present place is too big. We only heat the rooms we use, but that means the corridors are cold, etc.

We are looking to stay in the same neighbourhood, and to buy a house on two or three floors, as we think it helps with fitness to have to go up and down stairs. We may get to the point where that is impossible, but there are always stair lifts, etc. 

Just to add a few points: Nearly all the houses in this area were built around 100 years ago. They nearly all have *terrible* insulation, so are expensive to heat. 

DW is looking for a house with enough space to install a downstairs shower room, in case one of us becomes unable to go upstairs. In reality, that's very hard to find. 

bouicca21

@GDB2222.  Having wittered on about liking having space, I have to say that for me not being able to heat the whole house to an adequate temperature would be a powerful argument to move.  I also like my comfort.

A downstairs shower would be nice but I think a downstairs toilet is likely to be essential and they can be fitted in surprisingly small spaces.  Toilets are used more often than showers!  Stairs that can be fitted with a stairlift (not always possible, so need to check) should be high on the list and would future proof access to  bathroom facilities.

The other possibility if the house is really big is to split the place into flats and live in one, rent or sell the other.  My friend of the 4 bed house actually owns the only house on that particular bit of road that hasn’t been split into flats.  

jennifernil

Our present house was built to our  design  back in 1988.  The insulation we had put in is only now being caught up on in the  building regs, we chose everything ourselves, so are not really keen to move elsewhere.

We probably should have done so about 10 years ago, as we feel it would be too much hassle now.  We have done a bit of clearing out in the loft, but our hearts are not really in it.

The house is quite big, a total of 280sq m, plus a 40 sq m integral double garage.    We have a lounge/dining room, dining kitchen and  toilet upstairs,  and a utility room, box room (OH's workroom), 4 double bedrooms, and 2 bathrooms downstairs.   Also upstairs is the "granny flat", my Mum stayed with us for 13 years, which has a lounge, dining kitchen, double bedroom and bathroom......about 1/4 of the total floor area of the house.

It is not particularly separate, we now use it as just part of the house.  The lounge is now my study and sewing room, the kitchen is just extra storage space. Bedroom and bathroom useful for guests.

Since both our children left home years ago, 2 of the downstairs bedrooms have been repurposed into a study for OH, not that he uses it much, and a library with a double sofa bed for guests, not that we get many.

The third, smallest, bedroom, still has a bed, but has become a winter storage area for our caravanning equipment, so using it as a bedroom is not easy.   We just have far too much "stuff"!

It is definitely true that you just spread out to fill the available space! 

When my Mum died, 22 years back, we considered moving, but could find nothing we really liked, and decided to stay as we knew the house and that it  was well built.

Now, we (age 74 and 80) would consider moving to a smaller bungalow, as stairs are starting to become a problem, but as said above, the rooms are just far too small, especially the lounge, for our much loved and good quality furniture.   Kitchens are also small and not to our  liking.  In fact everything is just too small!  We could go  with fewer rooms, just not smaller rooms.

So it looks like we will be staying and adapting the house to our needs.  We have already redone 2 bathrooms to remove the baths in favour of  easy access showers, 
and have also replaced the boiler and updated the control system.

I just need to get OH to take tidying his rooms seriously, he is a serial hoarder, and very untidy.