Divorce bill

wannabe

Hi
I wonder if anyone can give me any advice on this.
I found out in October that my husband of 2 yrs had done some very bad things and put the nails in a very shaky marriage. There is no way I could ever be kissed etc by him.
Anyway I filed for divorce and armed with loads of evidence asked him to leave our home as solicitor advised.
She wrote to give petition etc and he is refusing to acknowledge any of it and keeps sending me texts/emails even a letter telling me how much he loves me and will put all that behind him. He thinks that sorry will cover it. He has obviously lied to all family and friends and I can't bring myself to be a !!!!! and reveal all the pictures etc to them.
The long and short of it is that I am now up to £2000 and I don't even have his acceptence of the divorce. I believe he is dragging it out determined for me to not buy him out of the house as I will be so broke from the solicitor bill. Is there anything I can do?
I don't qualify for legal aid and due to his behaviour there is an injunction against him and I am completely within my rights to get the divorce and have oodles of evidence to back everything up.
I just feel so desperately unhappy about the whole thing.
I don't claim to be an angel but I feel I am quite a good person (or try hard) and I am trying hard to not feel very sorry for myself.
Many thanks
wb x

mookiandco

When you issued the divorce petition, in the bit marked ' Prayer', your solicitors should have asked for your husband to pay the costs of the divorce. check that they did this so you can pursue your costs back from your husband.

Your solicitors need to arrange to personally serve the petition on your husband. If you can prove he has received it you can apply for deemed service. Your divorce can then progress.

If your husband refuses yo co-operate with the property matters and you need to make an application to court for ancillary relief, your solicitors can seek costs against him.

wannabe

Thanks for this.
Would you have any idea what sort of costs we are talking about?

Bettyboop

Hi, I almost went through with a divorce. A very stressful and upsetting time of my life. It seems your husband is contesting it and that is going to make your fees rise all the time. I haven't read the replies so far but it seems really high. It's a shame you don't qualify for legal aid but in the interim would it be an idea to see the CAB? perhaps you qualify for some other help to get you through financially.

Hope everything works out for you. These things are never easy. x

mookiandco

You can seek your legal costs from him (sometimes called wasted costs). Essentially it is all the costs you spent on solicitors which are unnescessary costs because he refused to co-opertate and reach agreement in respect of the property.

With regards to the divorce, it should be all your legal costs so long as your solicitors have asked for it in the prayer.

mutley74

as an earlier poster mentioned request for the divorce be served on him by a court bailif. sorry it costs more money, but once issued officially he has a number of days to responde. if not then the divorce can proceed. you can ask someome independant to serve the papers to him then they need to attend court and sign under oath they have served the papers to him, but usually court bailiffs are best as they know what they are doing.

iceicebaby

I had to get court bailiffs to serve my ex husband. Cost me £30 but its worth it as je cannot say he hadnt had them! He then had a certain number of days to reply otherwise they take it as hes accepted.

LucyT_3

Hello, just wanted to recommend caution in dealing with divorce solicitors. The site Divorce Solicitor Trap (a non commercial site which gives advice free of charge and is on the consumer's side) could help you to avoid the pitfalls. You are being sucked into a dangerous situation both financially and emotionally and you need to step back and understand the process better.

wannabe wrote: »

Hi
I wonder if anyone can give me any advice on this.
I found out in October that my husband of 2 yrs had done some very bad things and put the nails in a very shaky marriage. There is no way I could ever be kissed etc by him.
Anyway I filed for divorce and armed with loads of evidence asked him to leave our home as solicitor advised.
She wrote to give petition etc and he is refusing to acknowledge any of it and keeps sending me texts/emails even a letter telling me how much he loves me and will put all that behind him. He thinks that sorry will cover it. He has obviously lied to all family and friends and I can't bring myself to be a !!!!! and reveal all the pictures etc to them.
The long and short of it is that I am now up to £2000 and I don't even have his acceptence of the divorce. I believe he is dragging it out determined for me to not buy him out of the house as I will be so broke from the solicitor bill. Is there anything I can do?
I don't qualify for legal aid and due to his behaviour there is an injunction against him and I am completely within my rights to get the divorce and have oodles of evidence to back everything up.
I just feel so desperately unhappy about the whole thing.
I don't claim to be an angel but I feel I am quite a good person (or try hard) and I am trying hard to not feel very sorry for myself.
Many thanks
wb x

wannabe

Thanks so much I will check it out - you sound like you have experienced this yourself.

eira

Thanks for tip re Divorce Solicitor site-can't say strongly enough to be ware of divorce solicitors.it is in their interest to make things as difficult as possible. They can quite literally ruin you, walk away and there is very little you can do about it. They can leave such a mess that you will need to win a major lottery prize to pay your way out-if you can find a competent practioner with a true sense of justice.

DO NOT BE RUSHED-get a copy of the Which Guide to Divorce (which covers the simple basics). Go to the local courts and ask the clerks what forms you can fill in yourself-they don't give legal advice but you can be more or less sure that at least the forms have ticked the right boxes. Go online/these forums and learn from other people's experience-note for example the £30 from one contributor to get the money-do that through a solicitor and that's at least £150 for starters with no guarantee of total success. They will send useless letter after useless letter and when it gets to court the judge will assume you're the bad guy-and that's another story.The judge's decision have no logic-or very often simple compassion.

I have made some headway in my mess ( projected solicitor bill £30000 for mess sorting on top of the £30000 already paid). Cost ? Online research as to US/UK law-the whole thing could have been sorted for the price of 3 postage stamps/a call to the tax authorities and attention to detail-I swear that is the honest truth. And it was all simple.-even though I've been told (by yet another solicitor) 'no one has ever succeeded in getting the money due' !

In sum-DON'T PANIC/DON'T BE BULLIED/KNOW YOUR RIGHTS-and most important MAKE SURE THAT ASSETS AND INCOMES are protected.
If being divorced is miserable it is infinitely more horrible to be divorced and rendered a destitute debtor.
Sorry to have gone on but of all rip-off merchants solicitors are by far the most dangerous (apart from maybe cowboy builders)

wannabe

It's just unbelievable.There is no justice. I am the innocent party and I could end up going under. It has already cost me £2000 and he still hasn't even agreed to divorce, yet there is loads of evidence against him. He is just hoping if he ignores it, it will go away. Or if he says sorry again I will forgive him. Men ... ok some men...