Prosperous soul, mortgage neutrality & creativity Year 2

doingitanyway

Blinds are a great idea. 
You sound like you need a break from house hunting. Although easier said than done I know.

badmemory

Overload is not good & as has been said it sounds to me like you are heading that way.

jwil

A big house may give you the potential to have lodgers (but would you really want that given your aversion to noise and desire for privacy?) but perversely if it has higher running costs and a bigger mortgage, could put you in the position that you need the lodgers, whereas a house with lower running costs could help you avoid that need.

I agree it might be wise to take a sick day or two to take care of you.

skint_spice

I feel for you SH, you sound as if you are finding it all overwhelming right now. I hope you manage to make a decision which makes you happy. I agree that thinking of renting rooms would probably not suit you (or me!) especially multiple rooms.

savingholmes

Thanks Beanie, WD, Merlin, DIA, Jwil, Skint, BM

I had a good chat about the situation with a few people yesterday so I've managed to rein myself in. I'm not being evicted. I have a perfectly good home. There's no rush. If these buyers drop out it isn't the end of the world so I need to stop acting like it is. I woke up thinking I could buy some privacy film to put at the top of the kitchen windows while I wait to buy / find blinds.

I need to cancel today's viewing as it's a compromise house and I'd hear trains from there. I also agree a difference between my sis and me is she's had lodgers and I never have. I agree it would be a last resort. The reason I suggested renting out rooms rather than the whole house is that it would bring in far more money.

In more positive news I've just booked a cottage stay for a month's time. £379 so happy with that. It's in one of my ideal locations to live in Wales. DD will look after my cat - possibly with help from my neighbour. 

jwil

Great news about the cottage!

EssexHebridean

I think I said this before, but I really do think that right now, you perhaps need to step away from the house moving question entirely while you let yourself settle in to the meds and get more stabilised in terms of thought processes.  Maybe time to apologise to your current buyers and tell them that due to a change in person circumstances you need to withdraw your house from the market right now. It just doesn't feel to me - and I suspect from what has been said, to others too - that you are in the right place right now to make a truly enormous life decision like this. If you "needed to" move then I'd say that would put a different perspective on things - but this is very much a want, isn't it. 

Even an extra few months thinking time would enable you to clarify what you want, whether in fact downsizing in the true sense is right for you (and you certainly don't "need" to - trust me, we now have a ridiculous amount of room for a two person household, far more than we "need" - and I refuse point blank to feel in any way guilty about it!) or whether actually you need the same number of rooms, just a different location and more to the point perhaps be sure that any decision you are making now is made from a place of a calm mind.

When you find the right house, none of the decorative issues will matter in the least. MrEH LOATHES the colour orange - I mean really REALLY dislikes it. Our new house has orange tiling and paintwork in the downstairs loo, and orange blinds in the office. Neither of these proved a barrier to buying it in the least because it was the right house. Agree also that light can be massively important - and this was one of the things that stood out even in the listing photos of ours - that pretty much all the rooms were wonderfully light. MrEH is also fairly stressy about road noise - he dismissed another house we viewed point blank purely based on a quite high level of road noise in the garden. Let's just say that where we are now is only 1 layer of trees away from the same level...  

I apologise for speaking so bluntly but right now I really do feel quite concerned that you do not seem to be in a stable enough place to be making a decision that will have such a profound impact on your life. Said with love, I promise. 

The holiday sounds like a lovely restful thing to have to look forward to - and will give you a chance to "live" with your location for a short while as well to see if it measures up on a day to day basis. 

doingitanyway

You sound much calmer.
The cottage sounds beautiful. Something to look forward to.
I've considered a bigger home and lodgers too. It makes sense but in reality I don't think I would be comfortable with it.

beanielou

An absolute no to lodgers. 

I have had many over the years but would really not now unless I was on the breadline. 

badmemory

I am going to be honest.  Looking back to my 50s even living in a mansion I wouldn't have wanted a lodger although would have done if I absolutely had to.  In my 70s over my dead body is the phrase that first comes to mind.  It would have to be a completely separate building at least.  Whilst my DS is being eventually looked at for ADHD I suspect I have similar issues.  The thought of having someones noise every day would be just too much.  I suspect that that being a choice would be a total non starter.