How to move on

[Deleted User]

sevenhills said:

Cat_Loving_Lady said:

I think for me it is the not knowing why as it was all of a sudden, I can't think of anything I did or said wrong so that's what is bugging me.

My ex has said that she likes being on her own, she is not a sociable person, so there was nothing wrong with me.
She is happy to be on her own, although she lives with her son.
I am the opposite, but never succeeded in relationships, life is not fair.

No, it is not fair.
Throughout life we're bombarded with unfairness, from all directions, each step of the way, we just learn with each new challenge that we've no choice but to get on with it.

Sometimes it's like trying to wade through treacle every day ...... after a while it gets less sticky and hard and we gradually realise that phase is finished.
Nope, not easy at all 😐🤷‍♀️

retiringtoosoon

She’s just not that into you.

Emmia

This person you seem slightly obsessed by does not feel the same, she is ambivalent about your relationship. 

For you, the need to be her friend and an active presence in her life, and she in yours is very strong, but she simply doesn't feel that way about you, and perhaps she's shying away a bit as she senses you want more from her than she's offering... 

Step away from her, and accept what she's hinting at...

Ath_Wat

Having had a look at your other thread it seems like you had contact with the person while you worked together, but once there was no need to speak to each other for work purposes, she stopped making contact.

This is incredibly common.  I would say in fact that it is the norm.

I have always had people at work that I spoke to a lot and got to know quite well while they were colleagues and never saw again afterwards.  You do discuss your personal lives (not in emotional detail, but casually) and you get to know each other quite well, just by the force of proximity.  However, they were never people you would have sought out; it's just chance that brings you together.  So when there is no longer a need to talk to them, it all dries up.

Go to anybody's wedding and you probably find three types of attendee, family, friends of long standing, and people they work with at the time.  The latter they might never speak to again after they change jobs. It doesn't mean there was anything false about the friendship, such as it was, while it lasted, it is just not one that is going to endure.