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Child maintainance have written off over £18000 owed from the last 18 years

After a very apologetic conversation with the very nice lady on the phone I have found out that all my digging on where he works, where he lives, what he owns has all been in vain. He paid on and off for years. I got two years of payments then stopped. They got a liability order. He paid for 3 months and then stopped again. He quit his job. I found out where he was working as a supervisor and gave them all the details but to no conclusion. They sent out bailiffs who tried twice and because they tried twice they have now written the whole lot off. It feels like 20 years of fighting for nothing. What makes it worse is I'm having to survive on minimum wage on uc and using food banks to survive. Then to add salt to the wound they have said my other child who is 12 his dad who I was with for 20 years doesn't owe anything because he has suggested he has no income (even though he rents out 3 flats) I'm at a loss. I have contacted my MP as they suggested to see if I can put a complaint in about the way its been handled but i'm not hopeful she will help. Where can I go from here. I feel like I can't let this go as I have nothing else to loose. If anyone has any suggestions what I can do next it would be very helpful. Thanks
Converted comper to MSE. Thank you for all your answers!
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Comments

  • tightauldgit
    tightauldgit Posts: 2,628 Forumite
    1,000 Posts Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    Not sure on the first situation, I think you are at the mercy of CMS and how much they are willing to enforce things.

    On the second one, if he's renting out 3 flats then is that income being reported to HMRC? If so then it should be appearing on CMS' systems. If not then he's committing tax fraud and you might want to take that up with HMRC. Have you gone through the appeals process on that one?
  • furby-2003
    furby-2003 Posts: 726 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 500 Posts
    Yes, He is declaring it to the HMRC but for some reason they have no income for him. I have explained he has 3 flats so they say they are doing investigations because he's not claiming benefits so how they said how is he living if he has no income. My only thoughts are he has used his £17k car against the flats income as an expense wiping out his income. We were going to do something amicable between us but with him not even speaking to me now i felt that was impossible and i just get told he can't afford anything. He kept our house which was fully paid for so no mortgage but quit his job just to live off the money from the flats. He won't speak as he's angry I went through the csa. I'm not sure what he expected me to do!. He says because he has my eldest (22 years old) at his house I shouldn't ask for any money for my 12 year old I have. 
    Converted comper to MSE. Thank you for all your answers!
  • tacpot12
    tacpot12 Posts: 9,281 Forumite
    Ninth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    I would definitely put in a complaint to the CMS; ask them to explain why they have written off the debt. 

    Of course you should continue to ask for money for the 12 yo you have living at home. The 22 yo should be paying their father the costs that he incurs by having them living at his house, and you should encourage them to do so. But there is nothing to stop you asking them to pay the money to you because their father is not paying for the 12 yo. 
    The comments I post are my personal opinion. While I try to check everything is correct before posting, I can and do make mistakes, so always try to check official information sources before relying on my posts.
  • CMS send you a form asking if you want old debts written off.

    I am awaiting ICE to investigate mine which they are trying to collect.

    What was the liability order placed in, one of his flats.

    Hiw did he keep the mortgage free home, was it his only?
  • no it was between us. I hadn't got it in me to fight him for it. I was suffering from anxiety and struggled being in the family home. He ended up not wanting to move out and offered £60k from a £220 house so instead of fighting and potentially staying in a very toxic relationship i took it and got out as fast as i could. I was also fighting his mom as she insisted she had a vested interest in our house my giving us the £70k deposit but was never legal or on the deeds. in hindsight maybe i should have fought but i had no family around me to help and was on my own. I have womens aid helping me now who say he should not have left me with nothing and shouldn't get away with it. Its been such a worry. He used to say because i was part-time and didn't pay the bills I wasn't entitled. I know this isn't true but he's very good at getting his way!. This is a new claim and he is the one with flats rented and no job apart from this. He has 3. He currently owes nothing according to the csa due to no income. 

    The liability order was on ex from the previous relationship from 20 years ago. he's the one the 18k debt was with. They tried the order. He paid for 3 months and stopped again so they sent baliffs twice who were unsuccessful. Because of that they wrote his debt off. The frustrating thing is he has a job as a supervisor and i have all the details but they seem unable to chase for payment. 

    Its all now with the local MP who I have little faith in. It just all seems unfair. 
    Converted comper to MSE. Thank you for all your answers!
  • tightauldgit
    tightauldgit Posts: 2,628 Forumite
    1,000 Posts Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    Yes, He is declaring it to the HMRC but for some reason they have no income for him. I have explained he has 3 flats so they say they are doing investigations because he's not claiming benefits so how they said how is he living if he has no income. My only thoughts are he has used his £17k car against the flats income as an expense wiping out his income. We were going to do something amicable between us but with him not even speaking to me now i felt that was impossible and i just get told he can't afford anything. He kept our house which was fully paid for so no mortgage but quit his job just to live off the money from the flats. He won't speak as he's angry I went through the csa. I'm not sure what he expected me to do!. He says because he has my eldest (22 years old) at his house I shouldn't ask for any money for my 12 year old I have. 
    If he is legally declaring the income to HMRC then I'm struggling to see how he's managing to offset the income on three rentals to get no income given the current rules. 

    You need to keep pushing that with CSA via appeals. In the meantime contact HMRC and ask them to look into it. He may well be claiming expenses he's not entitled to. 
  • tightauldgit
    tightauldgit Posts: 2,628 Forumite
    1,000 Posts Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    For example I don't think you can write off the entire purchase price of a new car as a tax deduction 
  • I know they are looking into it as he has no income according to him and no benefits so to them it makes no sense. what is he living off, well it doesn't take much working out? But they say it will take months to complete the investigation. 
    Converted comper to MSE. Thank you for all your answers!
  • I have been told I can go down a legal route buy the womens aid group as he left me with nothing expecting me to pick up the pieces of my life. no sure what they have in mind but I have a call on thursday to see. 
    Converted comper to MSE. Thank you for all your answers!
  • no it was between us. I hadn't got it in me to fight him for it. I was suffering from anxiety and struggled being in the family home. He ended up not wanting to move out and offered £60k from a £220 house so instead of fighting and potentially staying in a very toxic relationship i took it and got out as fast as i could. I was also fighting his mom as she insisted she had a vested interest in our house my giving us the £70k deposit but was never legal or on the deeds. in hindsight maybe i should have fought but i had no family around me to help and was on my own. I have womens aid helping me now who say he should not have left me with nothing and shouldn't get away with it. Its been such a worry. He used to say because i was part-time and didn't pay the bills I wasn't entitled. I know this isn't true but he's very good at getting his way!. This is a new claim and he is the one with flats rented and no job apart from this. He has 3. He currently owes nothing according to the csa due to no income. 

    The liability order was on ex from the previous relationship from 20 years ago. he's the one the 18k debt was with. They tried the order. He paid for 3 months and stopped again so they sent baliffs twice who were unsuccessful. Because of that they wrote his debt off. The frustrating thing is he has a job as a supervisor and i have all the details but they seem unable to chase for payment. 

    Its all now with the local MP who I have little faith in. It just all seems unfair. 
    Did you get nothing from the house though or did you take the £60k offered?

    He proved what sort of a person he is by skanking his mother off with the £70k deposit she lent you both.

    Hopefully the £220k was shared between then3 of you all which would be correct.

    Check on land registry to see who actually owns these properties (costs £3).

    The CSA now CSM cannot wipe off arrears without you agreeing, they have to have a signature from you , I refused and they are still collecting.

    If anyone is directly employed it goes through HMRC so they  know who’s receiving earned income, so if you know for definite where he works get it in writing to them, don’t phone it just makes you upset, always write.

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