Surprise pregnancy and house advice

mylifemyrules

Hi, 

We have just found out we are expecting baby number 3 and we are over the moon but I'm not sure what to do long term about sleeping arrangements. We have three double bedrooms, one with a ensuite and no room to further develop. We do have a conservatory that we have insulated with a thermal roof, carpet and heating and use that all year as a dining room, we could put a small dining table in the living room which frees up the dining room we currently have, it has french doors to the garden and another lockable door from the living room. What would you do? I'd love some suggestions please ♥️ thank you 

gwynlas

Either children share which is very common, you use one of the ground floor rooms as a bedroom, you split a double room into two singles or you extend into the loft. Without seeing a floor plan  it would be difficult to advise on specifics. You could always move into a five bedroomed house keeping another bedroom spare.

Racky_Roo

Babies will sleep with you for some time, could the older children share when the baby is ready to move into its own room? Lots of children share and then in a few years you could move or maybe convert the loft if that's not working.

mylifemyrules

We can't convert the loft it's too low apparently. Our eldest has ASD and is very settled and happy here so moving wouldn't be a option for us. I guess the best option would be they could share and later on we sleep downstairs in the dining room 

NBLondon

Racky_Roo said:

Babies will sleep with you for some time, could the older children share when the baby is ready to move into its own room? Lots of children share and then in a few years you could move or maybe convert the loft if that's not working.

Depends on the age and sex/gender of the older children?  If you have e.g. 2 boys close in age then sharing would be quite normal - unless the eldest would be severely disrupted by having to share.   Or if baby and middle are close in age could they share?

Not sure if you mean use the conservatory as a bedroom?  How many downstairs rooms are there - or is it open plan?

mylifemyrules

Our oldest and middle are two boys 2 years apart in age. We are not sure if our eldest sharing is ideal as he wakes up easily at night. There will be 4 years age difference between middle and baby when (he or she is born) yes that is what we were thinking. Downstairs we have a L shaped living/dining room which is open plan and the conservatory is off the dining area with a lockable door and French doors into the garden. It is fully insulated and we currently use it as a dining room but could put a table in the open plan living/ dining room the only negative is the only four into the garden from the house is in the conservatory but we do have a separate access through a garden gate. 

TBagpuss

You won't have to decide just yet as initially you can have the baby sleeping with you They won't needa seaprate room forthe first year so you have pleny of time to plan, and by the time you make any changes you'll have a better idea of the relationships between the childnre

  After that, have a re think. How old are the older two? 

Having two children share is reasonable - it might be a matter of havin the current two share but move them into the largest bedroom,(possibly even with a screen of some kind so they both have some privacy / spavece of their own have the second largest for yourselves and abby in the smallest room once they are no longer sharing your room.

depending on how old the middle child is you may decide that having the two yougest sharing is best. 

You could also consider using one of the downstairs rooms as a playroom so the kids have somewhere other than their bedrooms for thir toys etc, so the bedrooms and more / mostly for sleeping in. 

pinkshoes

I have 3 kids. We had thankfully bought a 4 bed house, so the kids don't have to share rooms. DS2 absolutely needs his own space due to ASD/ADHD. We had to change both our cars as not many cars fit 3 car seats! Going out anywhere is so much more expensive and challenging with 3, as they never want to do the same thing plus all family tickets and things seemed to be designed for 2 or 4 people!

Could you divide one of the bedrooms or re-configure the upstairs to make 4 rooms? Don't forget that bedrooms are mostly just for sleeping and having some personal space, and having family space downstairs is more important. You could get cabin beds with storage space underneath for small rooms. Do the bedrooms have walls that could be moved? You could look at having a larger window changed for 2 small ones so a room could be split etc...

I know many will disagree with me, but I think kids should have their own space/bedrooms and I think this is really important. 

mylifemyrules

Hi, I agree with you, at the moment the largest bedroom has a large window and ideally I would love to have that removed to have 2 smaller windows then split the room only problem I see is where would the second door go? Would I be able to send you some pics? 

marycanary

First of all congratulations on your happy news.

As others have said, there is no need to decide straight away, the new baby can sleep (or not ) with you at first. After that, it depends on the baby's sex. If they are a boy could the baby and the younger son share leaving the older boy to have a room of their own?  I appreciate that there will be an age difference but they will just have to learn to muck in together. If the baby is a girl your options are more limited. I can't see anything wrong with you moving into the conservatory, assuming it is warm enough. 

There are different views on sharing. As a child, I shared with two siblings and my children shared. I don't think it had a negative impact on us, but how would we know?

Good luck with your pregnancy, I hope everything goes well for you and the new baby.

SensibleSarah

When I was a kid (the youngest of 3 and only girl), all three of us shared a room for a number of years as it was the only option. When we moved into a 3-bed, my brothers shared until they were both in secondary school and I had my own (box) room. Once my brothers got older and sharing a room wasn't really an option anymore as it was barely bigger than the bunk beds anyway, I moved into the dining room downstairs and the table got moved into the lounge. Stayed that way until I left home aged 20. 
My best friend's single mum wanted her 3 kids to all have their own room in a 3-bed house so she slept on the sofa bed in the lounge for 15+ years until they started moving out - a major sacrifice IMO, especially as she had a bad back. 
For a modern day example, my friends (parents to 3 now teens) have moved their bedroom into their insulated conservatory so the kids can each have their own room. It actually works pretty well for them, about 3 years in, and gives them a bit of separation from the teen drama at times. They've looked into extending (replacing the conservatory so keeping to same footprint) but due to multiple builder issues and delays, it's never been a project they've pushed on with.