The turtle moves.... slowly

edinburgher

I didn't realise that you kept a diary here @astrocytic_kitten - how lovely

A lot of what you have written chimes with me as well - I am also an emotional spender who grew up around people much wealthier than myself and figured out the way to get there myself was to ape their spending with the income that I didn't have

Don't be reluctant/ashamed/embarrassed in terms of modernising your home or spending money on bits of updating that need done. As you say, jobs that are left for too long can become too big (like our garage that will probably require spending of £2,000-3,000 just to make it watertight and non-asbestos-y. As well as this, there's the self-respect angle to consider as well, your home is your sanctuary and it's ok to make it a place that makes you happy if you have the money to hand. Hmmm, I should write that on my own diary!

astrocytic_kitten

Merlin's_Beard said:

astrocytic_kitten said:

Also - I seem to be spending so much on the cats lately 😂 they had the entire feliway suite of products for the move but the stresshead cat is still very stressy, so I’m now working my way though calming supplements online (and then passing them to friends with anxious cats when they don’t work on my boy) and buying lots of new toys to try to help. I’ll probably end up spending a fortune at the vet if none of that works anyway. It’s a good job he’s cute!

Heard good things about the YuCalm cat supplements alongside the feliway stuff.

That's good to know, I hadn't come across that so will try it next. Zylkene seems to be the only one so far to have made any difference to him. At least my starving mature student friends are getting a wide variety of calming cat things to try out free of charge!

astrocytic_kitten

Thanks @savingholmes and @edinburgher, it's been a very useful process to think about what I actually want to achieve from spending the money. Making my home a retreat and a sanctuary is definitely worth it for me. You have a great way with words SH, I can see why you're a writer. I do feel happy here, the place has a really nice feel, but decorating and fixing some things will make a big difference.

I have a pile of people booked in to come out and quote over the next couple of weeks and a priority list of work to be done. I also have a cunning plan! Depending on how much the estimates come out as and when work can be booked in for (won't be for several months for most), I plan to pay some or all of the money I have set aside for each bit of work to the mortgage now, with the aim of then saving up towards the work monthly so I have the estimated amount plus a bit extra by the time the work happens.

This is a ridiculously overly complicated way of doing it, but I'm hoping that needing to save the money in time for the work will stop me getting complacent and keep me conscious of keeping spends down over the next year or so. I'd originally planned to increase the monthly mortgage overpayment by the amount I'll now be saving monthly towards the work so it's really 6 of one and half a dozen of the other, but the short timescale plan feels like the more fun one. 

p.s. @edinburgher I always thought you were far too sensible to be an emotional spender. There is hope for me yet!

girlatplay

Stop feeling guilty.  Do what needs done. You're not planning to move again anytime soon so get it how you want it. Get the little jobs done that need it, for obvious reasons. We've lived in our flat for 14 years and when I was showing it to someone yesterday it came out in conversation that I've never decorated my bedroom.  All other rooms have been done, including the hall (finally!) and LMG's bedroom has been done three times.  Why have I never done mine?  Next house I'm not going to feel guilty about decorating.

edinburgher

I also refuse to feel guilty about paying someone to decorate in future. We had our kitchen painted and it cost £320 in labour. It was finished to a standard that no other room in our house is (others were DIY) and it took him 2.5 days. It would have taken Mrs E and I the same time and we have to accept that our time has value too. Don't get me wrong, I accept a lot of people would rather DIY/save the money, but I wish we'd accepted defeat sooner and just paid years ago!

savingholmes

I would love someone to paint my hallway - and especially gloss the doors - which I hate doing!  I agree with Edinburgher that we took often put ourselves last on the list - but time really is £ particularly when we have jobs and limited time off. I am debating what to prioritise next in my home - but have such a long list I almost daren't start!

Glad what I wrote helped. As GAP says - go for it. With the £ part - it does sound like you may be over-complicating things. It is difficult to get tradespeople currently. I think the work will naturally split into phases even without a formal plan. Don't feel guilty about making your home nicer for you. The sooner you do it the better - assuming it's affordable...

astrocytic_kitten

Aww, thank you all ☺️ I have a couple of quotes already and some more people coming next week for the big jobs, so will hopefully soon be able to get some stuff booked in. It will be autumn at least before anyone’s free, but I’m getting some help on the little jobs sooner than that. Hopefully in a week or two’s time I’ll have much more clarity and a plan. Starting to feel excited about making the place a home too! 

I think it’s also helped that a lot of the annoying and stressful admin type stuff to do with moving is now sorted so I can start thinking about the fun stuff, and I’ve managed to progress the unpacking to the stage where it now looks like someone might live here instead of it being a box storage depot. Cats are gutted all the boxes have gone though 😂

savingholmes

Love the idea of the cats missing the boxes. 

astrocytic_kitten

The fun of the boxes has really mitigated the stress of the moving process for the cats 🤣

South_coast

Keep the boxes, save on the Feliway 🤣!