Joint tenants, ex-partners and both want the tenancy alone - help!

mic1000

Thanks to everyone for their replies and comments, they are very much appreciated.

As commented, since this is about property rather than relationships I didn't say much on the latter, but just a little to put this into context - I'm divorced, with children, who enjoyed their time with me at the house, but their Mum stopped access and that's going through the family court at the moment. That's obviously damaging the relationship with the kids and access will resume, but it will be that bit easier if they come back to a familiar house. Meanwhile the more recent ex knows how much I want my kids back and her blackmail was she'd make allegations about me, however untrue, to damage and slow down my case if I didn't get out. So on balance I decided to prioritise the case, especially if there's a way back to the house later on when the fixed tenancy ends and by which time hopefully access is resuming. It's playing the long game.

So, the recent joint tenant ex is nasty (not that the ex-wife is any better!), absolutely no desire to have anything to do with her once this is resolved, but I have morals and want to avoid sinking to her level as much as possible.

Part of my thinking in keeping stuff there is that it does keep some 'possession' even if I'm not sleeping there. But I see the logic of just moving everything out, especially if that's associated with then not paying. If worst case I just end up paying my share later on then that's OK, but I don't really want to end up with anything like a CCJ affecting my future prospects for renting or indeed buying.

canaldumidi

mic1000 said:

Part of my thinking in keeping stuff there is that it does keep some 'possession' even if I'm not sleeping there. But I see the logic of just moving everything out, especially if that's associated with then not paying. If worst case I just end up paying my share later on then that's OK, but I don't really want to end up with anything like a CCJ affecting my future prospects for renting or indeed buying.

keeping stuff there is not in any practical sense keeping some 'possession'. It just means your ex has access to your possessions....

Remove them or move back in (and I know which option I'd choose).

The advice earlier to stop paying but keep the money aside just in case is sound. It also allevates your concern "don't really want to end up with anything like a CCJ".

You don't get a CCJ unless the LL takes you to court, the judge orders you to pay and you still refuse to pay. Of course, having the money aside, means that should it actually get there far, you pay, satisfy the judge and ... no CCJ.

I also agree that putting this dispute in front of the LL will not impress either of you to him. He'll be happy so long as the rent comes in (relationship of his joint tenants is not his concern); but he'll be wary about grnting a new tenancy to either;

End the tenancy either by Early Surrender if ex & LL agree, or by motivating the LL to serve a S8 for rent arrears. And if ex picks up your retpaymets to void arrears, that's all well and good too.

Brie

lateral thought...what does your tenancy agreement say about who lives in the house?  Is it ok with the LL that the ex's new squeeze is permanently there?  That might be your opener for 10.

Slinky

mic1000 said:

. Meanwhile the more recent ex knows how much I want my kids back and her blackmail was she'd make allegations about me, however untrue, to damage and slow down my case if I didn't get out.

What a $hItty thing to do. Sounds like you've dodged a bullet there.

Sistergold

Dear OP, sorry about the fact that you have had an unlucky streak with partners, mother of kids and now ex both blackmailing you because you love your children. Unfortunately people like that will not stop because you are doing as they say instead they will ask for more blood. If you know you are good with your children and that your hands are clean then don’t accept to be blackmailed. Making you pay half the rent while they are living in the house with new boyfriend will be way over the top for most people. Allowing this on its own is not going to work in your favour. 

Children do adapt quickly to change and will pick up positively on your fresh start if you should move. The more you hold on to something the more grief it will cause you. The only way to get a result with this ex and blow their bubble is to stop paying rent and like I said keep this money monthly and more on the side! 

saajan_12

Waiting until July is pointless, as without cooperation between you + ex (+possibly LL), the tenancy would continue as joint periodic or you'd be liable for mesne profits. 

I would suggest one of the below, but do it now:
1) Agree with ex + LL to mutually terminate now and start new tenancy in one name only -> cleanest solution but only if LL agrees
2) Agree with ex that you'll move out, ex will get full use of property and cover full rent. (you're still liable to the LL but can sue ex civilly if she doesn't pay). In July you'll both move out unless LL agrees to a new contract with ex alone
3) Move back in and save on accommodation costs elsewhere.