Money Moral Dilemma: Should I stretch my budget to have an expensive holiday lunch with my friend?

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MSE_Kelvin
MSE_Kelvin Posts: 341 MSE Staff
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This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

I managed to get a good deal on the Eurostar to Paris and I'm now meeting a friend there. As we've not seen each other since before the pandemic my friend has suggested we go for a slap-up lunch but, while I'd really like to, it will mean spending a lot more than I've budgeted for. Should I just say yes as it sounds fun and we've not seen each other for such a long time, or say no because I can't really afford it?

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  • katejo
    katejo Posts: 3,819 Forumite
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    How well do you know the friend? Is he/she aware that you are on a tight budget? I wouldn't want someone to overstretch themselves for me. Could you suggest a slightly cheaper meal?
  • Voyager2002
    Voyager2002 Posts: 15,287 Forumite
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    A slap-up lunch would be enjoyable, but dealing with debt afterwards would not be.
  • CKhalvashi
    CKhalvashi Posts: 12,060 Forumite
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    There are many reasonably priced restaurants in Paris.

    When in Paris in December, a group of 4 of us paid around €70 for a nice and filling, but not overly posh meal. 2 of this group I hadn't seen for 2 years due to Covid also, the third I'd never met before (but knew the other 2 and we were doing the same thing at the same event). Just due to the district we were in, it wasn't the cheapest (a major venue within 200m).

    With one of this party (who I was sharing a hotel room with), we lived mainly on either small restaurants outside the centre (from €10 for both of us). The food was nice and we met nice people there. I'm quite frugal at the best of times, there's a lot of nice food in most cities with good value for money.

    You don't need to spend a fortune to have a good time, so it's likely worth saying to the friend that you're on a tight budget and can't afford this, as most people will be understanding of this, especially under the current circumstances.
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  • eDicky
    eDicky Posts: 6,575 Forumite
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    Is the friend a Paris resident who knows where to have a decent slap-up lunch away from expensive tourist trap restaurants..?
    The quality time of meeting and conversing with an old friend is much more important than a perceived quality meal which may not in fact be value for money. Be honest with them about your financial limitations, if they're a real friend it won't be hard find a suitable venue that doesn't detract from the quality encounter.
    Evolution, not revolution
  • TELLIT01
    TELLIT01 Posts: 16,489 Forumite
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    Be honest that you are on a fairly tight budget and can't afford a fancy and expensive meal.  Ask if the friend knows somewhere good but on a budget.  A true friend will be happy to change the restaurant.
  • JGB1955
    JGB1955 Posts: 3,482 Forumite
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    Just admit to being a bit 'strapped for cash' at the moment and challenge them to find an incredible budget lunch for 2.  You'll both be relieved and probably have a far better meal/experience.  One of our most memorable meals was a lunch in a bar/restaurant in Pinhao (Portugal).  It was down-to-earth, exquisite, and the memories of sharing a table with a load of local workers will live with us for a long time.  We did the same in Florence.
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  • Hadenoughofitall
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    You can afford to go to Paris but you can't afford the price of a lunch?
  • REJP
    REJP Posts: 325 Forumite
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    Tell your friend you really are on a tight budget and suggest he or she looks for a cheaper venue.  If you can't afford an expensive meal, cut out the alcohol content and have water or hot drinks.  Remember to budget for the expected tips too.  I have had experience of eating out in Paris, it is possible to avoid the tourist trap restaurants by checking menu prices in restaurant and cafe windows.
    you don't have to go to The Silver Tower for a 200 Euro speciality duck meal.  I used to find reasonable restaurants by asking a policeman.  They don't eat in the posh nosh emporiums.
    Above all avoid the popular tourist trap areas.  And guard your purse or wallet against the many pickpockets in busy areas.   That will save you money.
  • Lorena01
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    Why does the slap up lunch need to be in a restaurant. Paris is a beautiful city you could take a picnic hamper with lots of treats that don’t cost lots of money
  • Voyager2002
    Voyager2002 Posts: 15,287 Forumite
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    You can afford to go to Paris but you can't afford the price of a lunch?

    An expensive lunch in Paris could easily cost as much as all other costs of the day-trip added together.
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