Who can be a witness at a (no fuss) wedding? And who makes that decision?

Hi all

My partner and I have decided to marry, purely for practical reasons.  We won't even be telling our families...  We've been together over 20 years.  

We quite recently moved and don't know anyone in the area.  As such, I put an advert on Freegle not so long ago and have lined up a few people who would kindly and happily be our witnesses.  So we've called the council to book to "give notice", but they're insisting that the witnesses must be people who know us.  They won't book an appointment unless that is the case (although they did say a bank manager or solicitor would suffice!!!).  

I've just started reading up on it and so far all I've found says the witnesses can be anyone; so long as they are adult, have capacity, and can speak English.  I'm sure I've read in the past people using strangers off the street, or desk workers at the council offices stepping in (for the unread payment of a box of choc, etc.!) 

My questions are...  Is this still the case or has it changed?  Are such things governed by local authorities or UK Law.  And more plainly, was the woman who said it has to be someone who knows us right or wrong? 

Many thanks 

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Comments

  • GrumpyDil
    GrumpyDil Posts: 2,007 Forumite
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    I'd go back and ask them to confirm where they are getting the requirement that the witness needs to know you.  All the witness is there to do us to witness you signing the register so I don't believe there is a requirement that they need to know you. 
  • Sandtree
    Sandtree Posts: 10,628 Forumite
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    There is no legal requirement for them to be an adult, they must have the mental capacity to understand the ceremony and as such this can be used to rule out small kids etc but certainly a friend used their 17 year old kid as a witness. 

    Various articles however do say the officiant may impose their own rules like the witnesses having to be adults. Not sure if you are using a registry office if they are allowed to impose rules like the witnesses being known to you?

    Whilst you are seeing it as a matter of convenience is there a reason to not tell people? We did a very small thing with just friends so can understand not wanting the big thing but we didnt hide the fact either. We just used one local friend plus another out of area friend who came for the weekend in exchange for a meal.
  • Thanks @GrumpyDil

    I should have added...  To anyone who helps with the correct answer, the prize is the opportunity to be star witness at a strangers wedding.  For a bonus point, we'll consider confetti ;)  

    Unless I hear otherwise, I'll have another word with the registrar this afternoon and ask by whose authority she decrees it to be thus!
  • Tunstallstoven
    Tunstallstoven Posts: 1,041 Forumite
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    edited 7 February 2022 at 1:48PM
    Thanks @Sandtree - so perhaps I'm being hasty and they are allowed to impose their own restrictions / requirements.  

    As for not telling people, we have our reasons but thanks for sharing your thoughts on it.  

    If anyone knows for certain where we stand, or can point me to the right section of .GOV or other legal stuff where I can find it more myself, that would be fantastic.  

    Cheers
  • MovingForwards
    MovingForwards Posts: 17,139 Forumite
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    Have a look on the registry office / council website and it will say the requirements.

    In Scotland it's definitely not a problem.
    Mortgage started 2020, aiming to clear 31/12/2029.
  • TBagpuss
    TBagpuss Posts: 11,236 Forumite
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    It may have to do with them making extra checks to ensure that it is a genuine marriage, but I would check  - certainly it isn't normally a thing and it isn't unknown for people walking past a registry office to be asked to pop in to be a witness!
    All posts are my personal opinion, not formal advice Always get proper, professional advice (particularly about anything legal!)
  • Flugelhorn
    Flugelhorn Posts: 7,226 Forumite
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    I have seen people approached and asked to be witnesses and registrar was quite happy with it - it is up to the registrar to confirm that you are who you say you are and not the role of the witness
  • Tigsteroonie
    Tigsteroonie Posts: 24,954 Forumite
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    I've seen people volunteer to witness for no-fuss weddings on Mumsnet.

    Just tell the Registrar that you know the people but that, as you have a choice of four or five, you don't know which two they will be yet. S/he won't have a chance to speak to them individually to check whether they do know you or not.
    :heartpuls Mrs Marleyboy :heartpuls

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  • Jude57
    Jude57 Posts: 723 Forumite
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    I've seen people volunteer to witness for no-fuss weddings on Mumsnet.

    Just tell the Registrar that you know the people but that, as you have a choice of four or five, you don't know which two they will be yet. S/he won't have a chance to speak to them individually to check whether they do know you or not.
    I'd avoid lying like that, especially as OP has already made the Registrar aware that they don't personally know their proposed witnesses. Look up Personation . It's generally considered for cases of electoral fraud but covers this situation too. Marriage is a legal contract and all parties must be acceptable to the Officiant. If they're not, the marriage won't proceed. The Officiant may make whatever enquiries they see fit to ensure the marriage and the parties to it are legitimately able to carry out their lawful function. How long those enquiries take is not the Officiant's problem.

    I'd recommend OP asks the Registrar for advice in their situation. It won't be the first time this has come up and they should be able to offer guidance. I mean the actual Registrar, not front office staff, however helpful they may be. No one wants to be turned away on the day and the marriage not take place.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,571 Forumite
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    Seagull27 said:
    My partner and I have decided to marry, purely for practical reasons.  We won't even be telling our families...  We've been together over 20 years.
    Do make sure that whoever would deal with your estates if you died together (or the one left a widow/er was incapable) will find out about the marriage - it could make a lot of difference how your estates are distributed and how much tax is paid.

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