11 year old son has inherited a lot of money

pjcox2005

Take time to process it first and then speak to your son. I think the shock/change of circumstances are clouding your judgement currently.

For example, there is no reason why he won't learn the value of money whether from uni or elsewhere. Uni can quite often be a levelling experience with most wanting similar finances to their friends. If you coach him to understand that money gives him options in future, locking up majority for house, travel etc then his day to day life won't change as much but instead may just give more leeway to pursue options that make him a better person whether travel, different job etc.

theoretica

I think it is also worth acknowledging that managing £150k sensibly is not just a bigger version of £150 in the bank.   Good daily/yearly budgeting helps, but he will have two different skills to learn and find help with. 

KxMx

oystercatcher said:

With good financial education there is no reason to think he would spend all the money as soon as he has access. I know plenty of young people who have inherited money but still use it wisely and use it for buying a home or whatever after they have completed uni and living in a similar way to everyone else there. Financial education starts very early on, start teaching him to think about what he needs and how to use money wisely and budget for things he wants or needs. Tell him the money is there but that it's to go towards his first home and maybe driving lessons and a car when he is old enough , these things will help him improve his career chances. Teach him now how to moderate party type spending and hopefully the lessons will last.

Sensible advice but it's not up to the parent to dictate how another adult (even if that adult is their child) how to spend their own money. 

Advise and guide by all means but ultimately it is not down to the parent how the money is spent. 

Spendless

I would agree that what a parent thinks is 'wise' to spend money on, typically house deposits/driving lessons/car maybe travel isn't always the same way the 'child' thinks.

When my eldest went off to Uni, he was given his 'nest egg' of our childhood savings for him of around £1600 (would have been £2K but some money had to be taken out a couple of years earlier for his sixth form course) and we gave it with no restrictions but with the words when it's gone it's gone. Within the  first year it was. Son had spent some of the money on a new TV (which he still has) and building his PC into a better spec (he's on a computer related degree) but the majority had been spent on going out. What I hadn't been aware of, is that he had been bullied a lot at  Secondary school and that had been the reason behind me thinking he was a home bird and a bit of a loner. He used the money to enable him to socialise more, to get him meeting people and  build him up a friendship group which he still has. I've asked him since (he's nearly 22 now and engaged) if he regrets spending the money in this way instead of saving it for a later time/reason  and his answer has always been No for the reasons I've given. Now that's £1500 spent not  £150k  as an earlier poster pointed out but as he grows up you can fetch up various suggestions etc to him include how you got into debt yourself to increase his awareness of both spending and saving.  

pickledonionspaceraider

Oo I would tell him - as these things have a habit of coming out , and someone else in the family could tell him

I would perhaps not mention any amounts, just that there was a small nest egg for him when he is much older - and leave it at that (obviously when this has all been officially confirmed)

Emmia

Sandtree said:

Does that mean you've inherited a similar or larger sum? Money often flows down the family chain with younger generations getting less than older 

Not necessarily - the money in my will goes to the children of my siblings (I don't have kids), bypassing my siblings (who don't need the money in my view).

MalMonroe

I would tell him about it and mention the amount too.  I can't keep secrets anyway - and think that being honest with your children is always best. Unless it's something inconsequential that will hurt them, obviously. It could be that your son will receive his own notification (care of a responsible adult) unless the person who has left the inheritance has specified not. And that shouldn't be withheld either.

Also agree with those who say that it's not anyone else's place to advise someone what to do with their money or how to spend it.

If you trust that you have raised your son properly, you shouldn't really have any worries or problems anyway. If my daughter were to inherit any money, I'd not want to be in control of it. She may ask my opinion, but that's a different thing and she may or may not take my opinion on board. 

You could always have some chats with your son about responsible spending and saving but at the end of the day, it's his money and his choice what to do with it. If he chooses to blow the lot, it's not your business. But as I say, if you've tried to encourage what you feel is 'sensible' money management, he'll probably know what he wants to do. 

I have to say that when I went to Uni I didn't learn the value of money at all. It wasn't until much later, when I had to have a DRO that I began to learn how to manage it. Everyone is different and sadly, no-one is taught how to manage financially - which is why Martin Lewis wants to bring the subject to schools.

https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/news/2021/10/first-ever-financial-education-textbook-arrives-in-welsh-schools/

I'm not sure if you can still download a free copy (see info in link above) but it wouldn't hurt to start having a look at this book with your son. 

He's a lucky boy!     

FrankRizzo

I don’t have to add than what has already been said.

I do wonder, if it’s not in a trust, are you able to invest the money e.g buy a flat for his first home and rent it out in the mean time?

getmore4less

The trust exists either as will or statutory(intestate)

There is no setting up a trust.

This might help.
https://www.thegazette.co.uk/wills-and-probate/content/103941

The key will be the type of trust and the terms associated with it.

£150k the trustees will need to take legal and financial advice.

Who are going to be the trustees?

hardtime

My 16 year old nephew inherited £35,000 last year and it was a huge relief for him. He had hoped to go to Uni to study physiotherapy but knew he couldn't afford it and that when he finished his college course he'd have to get a job. Now he is thrilled that he can aim for that Uni course instead. If he didn't know about the inheritance he might not have tried so hard to get in. My daughter turned 18 last week so inherited her £35,000 which she doesn't want to touch as she wants to keep saving it for a deposit for a house. My elder daughter is using hers to explore the world.  Just because they are young adults doesn't mean they will blow it on rubbish.  Give them guidance.