Dilemma with recent house move and future

Hexane

Slithery said:

johnnpaull12 said:

The noise is so intrusive. The chaotic noise stops around 7-8 when kids go to bed but can still hear noise up until 10:30 when everyone’s in bed. Can’t relax or concentrate on watching TV.

Wondering if anyone out there has had any similar experiences or can give an opinion on what would be best to do.

Turn the TV up?

Not recommended. A few years ago we lived in a 1990s-built apartment. A young couple with a baby lived in the apartment above. There was some sort of mental issue or domestic issue in their apartment such that extremely loud insistent banging would happen anytime from 6am until the early hours of the following day. (We never totally understood the pattern of it, perhaps it wasn't happening when we were out at work, perhaps the late night banging was only weekends.) Talked to the tenant concerned and received various reassurances, but the banging carried on. It was intrusive and alarming partly in the extent that the banging - coming from *above* - was violent enough to shake the floor *underneath* us when the sound insulation was otherwise good enough that we couldn't even hear people speaking from the apartment above.

One occasion we knocked on the door of the upstairs apartment with another neighbour who said they heard banging constantly (despite being on the other side of the building!), the lady came to the door but was in tears and incapable of speech. Her partner later made various apparently implausible excuses about that.

Eventually we decided it was reasonable to turn up our music sufficiently that we couldn't hear the banging.

This led to the upstairs neighbours encouraging one of the other neighbours to go outside and throw stones at our windows - three storeys up! - so that when we came to the windows they could scream obscenities at us about our music being too loud.

Later further escalated from there and I believe the police were called on at least one occasion although (perhaps unsurprisingly) they didn't attend.

Had lived in three different apartments before that, in two different cities, with absolutely no noise problems whatsoever.

Fortunately living there was already planned to be temporary, now happily living in a detached house. Sometimes if the neighbours are having an especially raucous party then it's just barely noticeable if you walk into our bathroom (perhaps through the extractor fan?) and we just think "that's nice, someone's having a good time".

Maybe we're just odd though, I also couldn't stand the inability of certain demographics to arrive or leave in a motor vehicle without blaring their car horn repeatedly to announce their coming or going.

A former colleague of mine lived in a halls adjoining semi where the halls adjoined so much that he could hear the neighbour's dog breathing (not barking, breathing!) through the air bricks between them, when he was in his sitting room. He had no problem with that at all, and not only did he not bother closing the sitting room door to remove the distraction, but when the dog started barking as dogs do, he would bark back to encourage it.

newbuild2020

johnnpaull12 said:

Hi all,

I’m just looking for a bit of advice regarding an issue I’ve had since moving house.

Sorry if the thread is too long I’m new to this! I’ll try and break it down to keep it simple:

Partner and I recently moved into new house (Start Dec ‘21) which is a 3 Bed Semi. We moved from a 2 bed end terraced which was our home for 3 years. Only 5 min drive away.

We have realised we have a combination of a very noisy family next door with 3 young kids, along with a Semi Detached structure where we can hear everything coming through. The main issue is impact noises every time someone walks (stomps) around the stairs and landing, doors slamming, every going on in the kitchen.

Not unreasonable noise at all and no more than you’d expect from a house with 3 kids in (though they make so much noise!)

The noise is so intrusive. The chaotic noise stops around 7-8 when kids go to bed but can still hear noise up until 10:30 when everyone’s in bed. Can’t relax or concentrate on watching TV. On weekend we are woken up at 7:30 because the kids are screaming and stomping and can’t get back asleep.

Over the past few weeks I’ve reached my wits end. I’ve driven myself insane about what to do. I’ve spent hours online researching soundproofing and seen so many conflicting reports and opinions, I don’t want to spend thousands on it not to work. Apparently impact noise is nigh on impossible to stop travelling into our house. 

I was adamant on getting this done as I cannot put up with the noise but I was sceptical about its result. I’ve now resigned to the thought of getting it done, what if I were to spend £10k on getting work done and it STILL not work. 

Option B is we save this £10k and move house. (I’m looking at this could pay a large chunk of moving fees). Our fixed term ends July ‘22. I know we ideally need to wait 6 months to resell and it would look suspicious for it to go back on the market already. Would rather not also pay ERP’s. I feel like this could be a way out, while at the same time will give me a year or so to try and get used to it. (Though I don’t think I will).

OH isn’t as disturbed by the whole noise situation but knows I’m unhappy with it. She is wanting to decorate, make home improvements etc but my heart isn’t in it currently. It would upset her to contemplate moving again, but Ultimately I know she would never want me to be unhappy.

This was our ‘dream’ home and to be our ‘forever’ home, I was so looking forward to this new chapter in my life but I now dread the future and can’t see myself here. I know it sounds dramatic but I can’t put up with 20 years of it, I can’t get it off my mind!

We can probably afford a detached property so this could be an option in 12-15 months time. It will be a strange period of time for me but the hope of not being stuck in this situation slightly helps my mind. Haven’t told OH this thought process yet as I don’t want to taint their time here, I might just keep reiterating I don’t feel at home yet. 

We are still in our late 20s. We would like children in the next couple years which makes me feel we need to make sure we make the right decision.

Wondering if anyone out there has had any similar experiences or can give an opinion on what would be best to do.

Thank you in advance!

We’ve had very similar issues to you and we did decide to invest in sound proofing. We understand we might have to disclose this when we come to sell, but it’s surely a perk as it reduces noise and saves the new buyer £800 installing it themselves. Who knows, they might not be as noise sensitive as us. The soundproofing reduced TV noise but we still hear impact noise a lot. I think it’s heightened as I’m home all the time due to lockdown, I’m counting down getting back to the office! 

I would definitely put some rockwool insulation between floorboards as then do as we are- save away for a detached. 

Wishing you all the best, I know how much the noise can impact your life

Murphybear

I do sympathise as I’m sensitive to noise.  We lived in a terraced house for a few years.  It was in a quiet area of Devon and our road was a cul-de-sac.  One neighbour was very quiet, the other one was very noisy. They had 3 children plus another one after a few years.  We never used our garden because theirs was full of screaming kids. 

They got an extension built, they were there to stay.  

Someone started playing a guitar right next to the wall so my husband popped next door to have a word.  This was the first time in 9 years we had said anything to them.  Our neighbour pushed him out into the street and threatened him physically.  My husband is not normally afraid of anything but this shook him up.  Other neighbours witnessed this and we were told this family had been a problem for years.

Fortunately we were renting so we found somewhere else.  It was a big house on a farm near Dartmoor and the only sounds we heard were Baaaaa and Mooooo . It was bliss for me as I grew up opposite a field of cows.

The agent, who was a friend of ours, put 4 noisy sharers into the house.  

It sounds like  noise pollution has got a lot worse over the years especially problems with noisy neighbours. We lived in an end of terrace in the 50s and never heard a peep out of anyone else.

If I were you I would save up as much as I could and move.  Sadly, from my experience, the living on the edge feeling just waiting for noise to start won’t go away.  

Let us know how you get on, if you just need a sympathetic ear we are all here 

johnnpaull12

Hello Everyone!

Been looking forward to one day posting this update. Not sure if you’ll get notified but here’s a long overdue update from my original post!

So at the time of my post I was in a bit of a sorry state and not coping with the situation as described in the original post.

We decided to not get the soundproofing. We got quotes from different traders, took on advice. Ultimately we weren’t willing to take the risk.

The noise continued, every day. Our neighbours lived a different lifestyle and despite efforts it wasn’t a situation we were able to adapt to. Again as suggested before it was both their ignorance and an atrociously badly built semi detached house.

My partner soon caught up to how I felt despite her determination to put up with it. She grew sick of it and whereas I think I decided in my head I was done living there early on, she grew frustrated and more upset than me at what had happened.

We decided probably around autumn time last year that we were going to move house next year (current year 2023). We had some internal work done and certainly improved the house internally, all with the plan to move eventually and add value.

So we stuck it out for another year of my initial post before selling the house. We put it up for sale in January and had a tremendous amount of interest and were able to sell (even making a good amount of profit in the process!)

I am delighted to say as I write this message we are sat in peace watching TV in our beautiful brand new detached home.

I can’t quite believe it’s been 18 months since I was sat down writing my piece not knowing where to turn to. But I didn’t think it would have gone as quick as it has. I think knowing we weren’t going to stick it out there put our minds at ease and helped us come the end.

If we hadn’t had moved up the ladder and bought that house we wouldn’t be sat where we are now either. I don’t believe totally believe in the dating ‘everything happens for a reason’, but sometimes it definitely does.

Thanks to everyone for the advice and support at what was a really low time! It really helped.

All the best.

RelievedSheff

It makes such a difference being in a detached home doesn't it?

We could hardly believe the difference when we moved from our previous semi (complete with noisy neighbours) to our current "new build" detached. We have been here just over four years now and the difference it has made to our quality of life at home is difficult to put into words.

We love our home and cant imagine living anywhere else now, which is a far cry from the previous property.

So glad you managed to move in a quick timescale. We were stuck for 13 years and the toll it took on our mental health wasn't fully appreciated until we moved on.

Best of luck with making your new house a home.

Tiglet2

@johnnpaull12
Thank you for updating the thread and congratulations on your move to your new house.  I am so pleased for you.

Skiddaw1

Me too .

Have to say that whilst we spent many happy years in our previous (terraced) house I really don't miss party walls now that we're fortunate enough to live in a detached house.

housebuyer143

johnnpaull12 said:

Hello Everyone!

Been looking forward to one day posting this update. Not sure if you’ll get notified but here’s a long overdue update from my original post!

So at the time of my post I was in a bit of a sorry state and not coping with the situation as described in the original post.

We decided to not get the soundproofing. We got quotes from different traders, took on advice. Ultimately we weren’t willing to take the risk.

The noise continued, every day. Our neighbours lived a different lifestyle and despite efforts it wasn’t a situation we were able to adapt to. Again as suggested before it was both their ignorance and an atrociously badly built semi detached house.

My partner soon caught up to how I felt despite her determination to put up with it. She grew sick of it and whereas I think I decided in my head I was done living there early on, she grew frustrated and more upset than me at what had happened.

We decided probably around autumn time last year that we were going to move house next year (current year 2023). We had some internal work done and certainly improved the house internally, all with the plan to move eventually and add value.

So we stuck it out for another year of my initial post before selling the house. We put it up for sale in January and had a tremendous amount of interest and were able to sell (even making a good amount of profit in the process!)

I am delighted to say as I write this message we are sat in peace watching TV in our beautiful brand new detached home.

I can’t quite believe it’s been 18 months since I was sat down writing my piece not knowing where to turn to. But I didn’t think it would have gone as quick as it has. I think knowing we weren’t going to stick it out there put our minds at ease and helped us come the end.

If we hadn’t had moved up the ladder and bought that house we wouldn’t be sat where we are now either. I don’t believe totally believe in the dating ‘everything happens for a reason’, but sometimes it definitely does.

Thanks to everyone for the advice and support at what was a really low time! It really helped.

All the best.

Glad you got out! The quality of life a detached house brings if really hard to put into words, you just feel relaxed. I hope you enjoy your new place 👍