Passing responsibility of home clearance onto a friend instead of a family member

minizippy

Hello forum members.
I would like to ask some advice.
many thanks for any help in advance for any advice given.

After my Mother's recent passing and my sister's abusive response to me and my mum leading up to her passing, I've decided that if anything should happen to me, I would prefer to pass any responsibility of home clearance etc  onto my best friend instead of my sister.
I would rather my friend be notified of my death etc and give her the right to be first to enter my home, sort through any relevant documents, clear up any issues with final rent payments, bills etc.
I have asked my friend if that is ok with her, and she has said "yes."
Can i do this, and how?
Can anyone point me in the right direction of what i can do with my preferences at all?
Thank you.

elsien

Isn’t that what wills are for? Make one, and appoint your friend as executor. 

What you also need to consider is that you may become unwell and need help before you pass away so if you don’t want your sister as first point of contact then you need to consider LPA for finances and health/welfare, and who you would want that to be.
Otherwise the hospital/local authority will contact your sister first as “next of kin” although this has no meaning in law. 

You can also check with your GP if they have any system for registering the person you want contacted if you do end up in hospital. 

74jax

I am guessing at the moment your sister is executor? 

I would have a new Will drawn up, you could have a codicil, but for something as firm as a new executor I'd do a new Will.

Let your friend know where it is held and that is all you really need to do. 

Mojisola

minizippy said:

After my Mother's recent passing and my sister's abusive response to me and my mum leading up to her passing, I've decided that if anything should happen to me, I would prefer to pass any responsibility of home clearance etc  onto my best friend instead of my sister.
I would rather my friend be notified of my death etc and give her the right to be first to enter my home, sort through any relevant documents, clear up any issues with final rent payments, bills etc.
I have asked my friend if that is ok with her, and she has said "yes."

Are you going to make your friend a beneficiary as well?

If not, please leave her something in your will as a thank you for the work.

Also, if your sister is likely to cause problems for your friend, tell her that it would be fine by you to employ a solicitor to deal with the estate and act as a buffer between your sister and your friend.

Pennylane

74jax said:

I am guessing at the moment your sister is executor? 

I would have a new Will drawn up, you could have a codicil, but for something as firm as a new executor I'd do a new Will.

Let your friend know where it is held and that is all you really need to do. 

A few years ago a very qualified and experienced  solicitor told us the exact opposite.  He said a codicil was all that was necessary.  🤔

Mojisola

Pennylane said:

74jax said:

I am guessing at the moment your sister is executor?
I would have a new Will drawn up, you could have a codicil, but for something as firm as a new executor I'd do a new Will.

A few years ago a very qualified and experienced  solicitor told us the exact opposite.  He said a codicil was all that was necessary.  🤔

Legally, that's true, but changing the executor from an abusive relative to a friend, I would say do a new will.

Marcon

74jax said:

I am guessing at the moment your sister is executor? 

I would have a new Will drawn up, you could have a codicil, but for something as firm as a new executor I'd do a new Will.

Let your friend know where it is held and that is all you really need to do. 

Changing executors in a will is no big deal. Up to OP whether they wish to draw up a whole new will or just add a codicil. Either way, getting it done professionally is highly recommended.

TBagpuss

OP, as others have said, you need to update your will and name your friend as the executor - get this done through a solicitor and make sure that they make notes as to why you are not including your sister, and talk to your friend ahead of time to ensure that she is willing to take on the role. If not, then appoint a solicitor as executor and again, explain why.

You can change executors by codicil, but often it will be no more expensive to update the will instead, and it can ensure that things are clearer, and there are fewer hurt feelings or allegations flying around, as no one will see the older will.

minizippy

Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to respond to my post.
i haven't produced a will so far, but am in the process of creating one online with freewill..
Would i be best to contact a solicitor instead due to the complications regarding my sister or would the online will be suffice as long as i give instructions on why I'm choosing to leave my sister out of any will?
My preference is for my  friend to be the main  beneficiary.  and I plan to let her have access to anything i own. 
I have already given her a key to my property, but am worried that without proper permission by law, she would not have the right to access my property and sort through any belongings i own should anything happen to me?
Therefore, i am trying to "get things right" so if  i do pass away due to illness or accident. she will be first into my property and not my sister.
If i register my friend as next as kin with my gp, that would help cover any complications regarding who can rightfully, within law,  have access to my property?
I do apologize for being a little confused as to the right approach here, it's just that it's not everyday you have to plan in advance for your passing, and this is all pretty new to me.

doodling

Hi,

If your friend is named as your executor in your will then they will have the legal right to manage your estate from the moment of your death.  This includes clearing out your house, selling your stuff, etc. although in some cases (e.g. where a house needs to be sold, or there is a large sum of money in a bank account) organisations may not be willing to deal with them until probate has been granted.  Your friend would have to act in accordance with your wishes in your will with respect to your belongings.

There is an important caveat to this however.  Your will and therefore your friend's right to do this can be challenged until probate has been granted (it can also be challenged afterwards but that is less likely to be successful).  This means that your friend might be wise to limit what they do before probate, especially if the estate is valuable and/or someone (e.g. your sister) is likely to challenge the will.

Having said the above, it is quite possible to manage an estate without probate if it is not particularly valuable and there isn't ownership of a house / flat involved.

I don't know the motivation of your sister but I'm guessing that a lot may depend on how much money is involved - if it is simply a matter of using a few £hundred in your bank account to pay for a funeral and any outstanding bills and emptying your place of stuff that is not particularly valuable then it probably isn't worth your sister's effort in challenging the will, on the other hand, if there is £150k in a bank account and a Picasso in the dining room then there may be trouble.

The other thing to watch out for is that most people are advised not to act as an executor if the estate is insolvent (i.e. your debts are bigger than your assets) - if this is the case then you might find that no-one wants to have anything to do with your stuff and either your landlord just dumps it in a skip or he actively seeks out someone to empty the property.  In this case there may be a limit to what your friend can, or would want to, do.

As there is a risk that the will may be challenged, I would strongly recommend getting a solicitor to write your will and I would make him aware that your sister is belligerent and may challenge the will.

Practically speaking, if you want your friend to be involved then, in addition to making your will, I would make sure that you name them as next of kin any time you are asked, you make sure they they have a key to your place and you make sure that your sister doesn't.

I would also consider making a power of attorney in favour of someone you trust, both for finance and for health, in case there comes a point where you can't make decisions for yourself.  Without those, the wishes of your sister are likely to be taken over those of non-relatives when it comes to managing your finances and your care whilst you are still alive.

Mojisola

minizippy said:

Would i be best to contact a solicitor instead due to the complications regarding my sister

My preference is for my  friend to be the main  beneficiary.  and I plan to let her have access to anything i own. 
I have already given her a key to my property, but am worried that without proper permission by law, she would not have the right to access my property and sort through any belongings i own should anything happen to me?

If i register my friend as next as kin with my gp, that would help cover any complications regarding who can rightfully, within law,  have access to my property?

Definitely use a good solicitor.  Ask them to make and retain clear notes about your meetings, including your reasons for making your friend the executor rather than your sister  You should also have a back-up executor named in case your friend can't do the job when the time comes.

You can also write a letter to be kept with your will which sets out your reasons.  This won't become public like your will does after probate so you can be more expressive in your words!

Ask the solicitor to keep your signed will and the letter.  Have an unsigned copy at home and give one to your executor.

Register your friend as your NOK at the GP and at the hospital, if you have any records there.  Carry a NOK card in case you are taken into a hospital as an emergency - https://s3-eu-west-1.amazonaws.com/files.royalfree.nhs.uk/next_of_kin002.pdf

As doodling said above - think seriously about setting up a POA so that your sister doesn't take over your life if you become incapable of managing things.