A new chapter, An empty nest, Drama school & Last year of Uni

Spendless

Currently he needs to think through his options and what he wants going forward and needs to be in the right headspace to make this decision. I don't want him to rush things since less than 2 weeks ago from his POV everything seemed fine


Currently where he lives is within walking distance of his workplace, the location is nice even if the property is dated. The rent is cheap and the LL (a family member) does want to sell at some point, when decisions will have to be made

 Though he's certainly welcome to return to us, I believe it wouldn't be his first choice, understandable he left almost 6 years ago for Uni and never returned (except briefly for hols in the first 15 months) and he would need to commute, albeit not far but reachable on public transport or he'd need a car  (he can drive) 

The options between these 2 are to live in a far worse area that's  also a lot more expensive.

DIL won't/can't be back unless she is aided and abetted by another adult - the turning up the other day with a man and a van (2 men actually!) was because her Mum had arranged and paid for it and then drove her over. DIL doesn't drive, has never felt comfortable enough to use/work out public transport, has only done minimal online work, so hasn't got a great deal of money to enable things.  She has returned to the sleepy town she's from, where it would take her a 2hr+ bus ride from there to the nearest city, then a train ride to our city, and then either a bus or another train and a 30 min walk to get to the home she shared with DS. Just not going to happen under her own steam.

Last night DS went out with DH and some family friends/relatives, he was ok though a bit subdued during the night. Today we are going to go and see him and help sort things.

My friend who works in rentals has suggested putting an additional lock on (for security reasons) rather than a change of lock just to make DS feel safe, but we will get DH to have a look at practicalities today. 

This week is already looking very spendy. Tomorrow I have my car in to the garage to investigate why it's been making a strange noise when turning for a few weeks. This is part of the strategy to help DS, because I was left a few thousand pounds last year as an inheritance from my Nan which is earmarked for another car. Time to see what the garage have to say about how long a lifespan is left in mine, to see if I need to replace and DS possibly be given y current car. We are desperate for grocery shopping and have been all week whilst this has been kicking off but don't want too much cos no point as we go away soon, but enough that that I can make packed lunches, currently can't think straight enough to know what that  shopping list looks like! Towards the end of the week I have a dental appt to have a new crown due to breaking my tooth which will be a £300+ bill. Then we go away. Fortunately a lot of stuff whilst we're there is covered and I know last time I minimised spending by doing things like taking the complimentary water from the room to have by the pool, eating at all the included meals, getting a deal through the hotel for us to do a Disney visit, plus we have a complimentary spa visit and me a free facial. Very thankful we have savings to fall back on and the debt almost gone. I asked DH yesterday when the 0% period was up, but he wasn't sure. I'll ask him to re-look today My gut is it's September. I only think this because the savings to pay back work out as matching during August and for a long time I talked on here about how I could meet it with  July 31st paypacket and just pay everything that day. Just thinking possibly being away will give me and DH some actual time together to talk through various strategies to put to DS to help him. 

At some point I also need to pack. This is my last day that I'm not at work before we leave. 

Spendless

Ok, so 0% CC deal finishes on 13th Sept this year. I had looked us paying it all off even by end of this month, until recent happenings.

We have put it to DS that we pay the next 2.5 months rent for him (it is fortunately low and this month's already paid).
We are doing this to allow him time and space to sort things out and make any decisions about what we wishes to do
 I need to number crunch accurately but my initial thoughts are this is going to be equivalent to same amount we've been used to putting away - just as well I paid back the other borrowed bit earlier this month. Our £100 min payment to the CC comes out 8th of month. Once the last of the interest has hit the accounts where our savings go during August, we pay off the CC except for £100 which will be paid off on 8th Sept when the payment is due out. 

Going to put it all on a spreadsheet now. 

Spendless

I don't have enough of my wages left from this month to cover the dental bill let alone whatever today's garage bill will be and also pay DD the final couple of weeks of living expenses. Thankfully the money I paid at the beginning of May  to make it we only had one debt was into accessible savings, so if need be I can borrow from there and pay back next month if it doesn't look like DH's wages can cover everything.

Mum has gone halves with me on one of the small shopping trips I've done to replace miscellaneous stuff for DS, which I'm very grateful to her for. 

Currently my work contract is until late June. That means I will receive a pay-packet at the end of this month and another end of June. I should be able to put the money to one side for what we agreed to pay for DS rent. If this is achievable it leaves DH's wages to do the work it's previously been doing.

I am thankful that for the 3 weeks left of May, we are away with the majority of expenses provided or already paid for. 

Spendless

Garage owner/mechanic  didn't charge for looking over my car, it just needed some fluid in it  and gave some idea to the extent of life it had left whilst saying it would still pass an MOT today. Will decide the way forward once we're back.

DD decided to take the 'compassionate leave' offered and has come home for a few days. 

Forgotten we  also have dog boarding to pay whilst we're away! 

Spendless

The other night DS got locked out of his house by leaving his keys at work and not realising till too late. Cheapest and easiest option would have been to spend the night at ours and retrieve from work the following morning, however he was adamant he didn't wish to. He isn't in the right headspace at the moment and he has told DD that he feels we are 'fussing' him (we'd seen it as checking in with him to check he was ok, given the lightening speed of his changed circs) so I didn't push this angle. Upshot was a locksmith had to be called, with the associated costs of a call-out fee plus new lock/keys  but the silver lining is the locks have now been changed legitimately, and we have one of the spares. The other door in the house which isn't used for day to day purposes because the area out that way isn't as accessible for everyday  stuff (more countrified) can be sorted by putting an additional internal lock on to make it more secure. 

DS also told me he's chatted to people on a SM group and intends meeting up with them at the weekend as there's a set price ticket event on in one of the pubs. Seeing this as a positive sign. 

Spendless

On Wed interest got applied to some of my savings account and for the first time on this journey I didn't even remember. Noticed this morning and moved money around. Can't believe  on May 1st I paid off some debt with my wages thinking May was going to be an uneventful month! How wrong can you be. Think I've learnt my lesson about seeing a month out to see what curveballs life throws at you first before paying too much out at once. Pleased it was just paying into savings accounts though, easily retrievable if needed and that the debt is all at 0% anyway.

Not sure how long my current temping role will last as an email also came out this week saying about a restructure in the department. Nothing I can do now till we get back from DH's worktrip.   

Aimingforthegoodlife

Fingers crossed that the role can be extended even with a restructure! Poor DS, that is shocking! Glad the locks have been changed, psychologically I think that will help. Have a lovely holiday!

Spendless

Logging in from the sunny states. Enjoying my time here whilst DH works. Some days have been spendy as we arrived a couple of days before the conference started and after the breakfast at the airport hadnt been that good, decided the following day to treat ourselves to the hotel buffet breakfast - $100 later! (Its an expensive hotel and not one we'd be staying in under our own budget) Part of the issue was we'd not realised only regular coffee was included in the price not lattes/cappucinos that we'd ordered as drinks was waiter service whereas food was buffet plus the tip.

Before conference started and meals were included, I also tried lobster which was Mums tip to try in the States where its loads cheaper than at home. We also did a grocery store trip picked up items we love but cant get at home and a few other bits as gifts. Kids combined however both cost us more that day than shopping did. Thats because DD is at end of yr1 and trying to manage the last week and DS contacted me about 3 bills (utilities/food)he thought hed struggle to pay before his next wages saying he hated asking us. Told him not a problem he wasnt anticipating this situation at the beginning of the month, so we would help him and then his next payday work out a budget together. My parents are keeping an eye on him, had him over for Sunday dinner and Mum (a hairdresser) cut his hair, which im glad about cos was never keen on how DIL did it (not that I ever revealed this) 

Yesterday i had no personal spends, breakfast, lunch and dinner were all included plus drinks. I took an extra can of pop, crisps, cookie with me to nibble round the pool in the afternoon. I have got slightly sunburnt on my head so the mini first aid kit given away at one of the exhibition stands came in handy. I went back to the stand this morning told them i had to use it already and they gave me another to fetch home. 

I have my expensive facial this afternoon so dont go in sun as im not risking salon say they are unable to use products on me due to sunburn.

Tonight is 'party night' not entirely sure what to expect but am sure it'll be amazing. 

Honeysucklelou2

Just catching up with your diary. I’m so sorry to read about your DS and your DIL. What a shock for you all.  My sympathies to him…I know how horrible it is to come home from work and find stuff gone. It’s a good job that he was home and a full raid was stopped.  

Hope you have a great time while you are away.

Spendless

Thank you everyone. Yes of course HSL, you must know better than anyone how this feels. I still can't get my head round it all and that includes me having to say this isn't an acceptable think to do, turn up announced and take stuff! Still don't know how you can go on hol one weekend in seemingly good spirits talking happily about future events and only 6 days later the marriage ending with little to no explanation as to why. 

On a financial level helping DS cope this month has hit us to a level not experienced since the beginning of last year, we went overdrawn yesterday   though some of the expenses is from being away last week and was always intended to be taken from savings, just not had enough time to work it out. We've also not paid the CB CC for the first time, but that isn't due until 1st ands we can pay tomorrow from our wages that will both be paid.

If I'd known at the beginning of the month what the rest of May would fetch I probably wouldn't have paid off the amounts back into savings that I did. On here I frequently speak up to others about not throwing every penny at debt and keeping an amount back just in case life throws an unexpected curveball and then I don't practise what I preach purely because it came in a different wrapper.

I also woke in the early hours with excruciating toothache. Emergency appt later and a filling with gum treatment. Still painful. Thankfully wasn't charged, I suspect because dentist should have picked it up at recent appt and missed it.

Anyway penultimate end of month round up. Current debt is now one credit card for £8105 with £6600 in savings to pay this off meaning current balance is £1505. Looking forward to June when it will go <£1K