Marriage breakup and divorce

6 Posts


-I have been married for 20 years
-I bought the house 2 years befor I got married
-We have 3 childresn aged 18, 15 and 10
-My wife has been working as a child minder for 17 years or so
-My wife has been using the house for her childminding business
-The morgage is now paid but my wife has never contributed a penny towards the morgage, council tax, food or any of the bills. She spends merely few pounds a week on munchies for the children
-Until 2015, I have been paying for all the holidays
-Since she started working back in 2004, she has been using her money and the child benefits to help her parents build a bloc of flats and several shops abroad that they are now renting. More recently, she has been transferring her money abroad and investing in gold that she keeps at her parents home abroad.
We now getting to the point where we are living seperately in the house and we don't even communicate. I can't bear living under the same roof as her anymore and thinking of moving out of my house and eventually file for a divorce and would like to know what my options are.
Any advice or guidance would be greatly appreciated.
Many thanks.
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Sorry for not starting with Hi or a Hello. I have typed the text in notepad and then copied it and pasted here and forgot to start with a hello.
Cheers
I would suggest you need to get some relationship councelling to help you figure out if you want to get divorced or not.
If you do decide to get divorced, you should look to get a clean-break order so that you and her are no longer finacially connected. As part of a financial settlement you might have to give her 50% of the house, but you can ask for her assets abroad to be taken into account in the settlement. You might also need to share any pensions you have if she does not have a pension.
That would give you a lump sum to buy elsewhere.
Regarding other assets/pensions/gold. You will need to negotiate with her but the starting point will be 50/50. Perhaps see if she will agree to 50% of the house then you'll leave her other finances alone and she leaves your other finances alone.
Would've = Would HAVE (not 'of')
No, I am not perfect, but yes I do judge people on their use of basic English language. If you didn't know the above, then learn it! (If English is your second language, then you are forgiven!)
She does not earn enough to take a mortgage out for 50% of the house. In case this goes to court, will I be able to get the house sold and get my 50%? Also will she be entitled to part of my private pension even though all her money went abroad and never contributed anything in the house?
If it goes to court, will she be forced to agree to the sale of the house so I get my 50% even though I have children under 18?
You've missed a few steps,
1. the date you moved in together.
2. House valuation
5. Pension valuations for you both, private and state.
Funds are calculated from that. Your looking at 50/50 split, plus spousal maintenance.
It would be reasonable to say your future ex wife needs a 3 bedroom house, just like yourself. Your needs mirror her's. Can you force the sale? Probably not due to being so close to 18. Children need stability in the final years of education! Would you want to trash that as a parent?
Please go get some paid for advice, from a solicitor! The first 30 mins are free, so don't waffle on like your original post.
if this really has been the situation then why wait 20 years to do something about it?
if you want to play her at her own game wait until the youngest has left school/education and then it really will be a 50/50 split, however, that’s a long time in your case.
I would gather as much evidence as you can of her finances - once you’ve separated and involved lawyers things will get messy and for your own peace of mind get that info beforehand so she can’t 'forget' about anything and find a good lawyer because it sounds like you will need one. Ask others for recommendations.
Happy moneysaving all.