Future Proofing my life: Deposit saving then MFW journey in under 13 years

KajiKita

Well done on the calm conversation with the director. I can’t help thinking that if he really appreciated your maths you would be closer to the top of the suppliers and service providers he paid first - I rather get the impression that you are quite low on his priorities for payment ….

Glad the side hustle prep was so much fun 😊 and everything else is ticking along 😊

KK

TallGirl

Well done on the decluttering and the chasing of the invoice hopefully they will pay that money soon and good on you for staying firm. You cannot give in to people like that and if he needs you he will have to pay his debt.

Sidehussle sounds like it is making great progress would you ever make it your main business? Say you had your own home and you could cut your income down? 

LadyWithAPlan

@TallGirl my side hustle was my pre Covid 'main' gig - I ended luckily getting a contract  job I could do during lockdown  - I am now endeavouring to go back to my 'side hustle' full time again - however finance  day rates pay super well - and the mortgage or getting of one is far easier in finance 
I don’t want to get another big contract but may need to (for a mortgage and regular income ) on my return beg Sept as by then I will have some clarity on what’s been paid , happening and how the side hustle went 

@KajiKita yes you make a valid point though he actually said I am now number one priority to be paid so we will see - going to update the invoices and the interest I am charging him monthly  - it’s a big mental relief actually to have decided after 5 years not to hang on to this job and let it go - unless I am paid 
My job is more back end so less obviously urgent until it becomes suddenly a deadline

i have accidentally saved loads though in having invoices to be paid  and delayed putting money in now falling stock mkts  so not all bad 


exercise - realising my MH not great with all this inflammation and allergies I started back doing the ems last Friday interspersed with home insanity workouts - a week on I feel so much better, stronger  and a bit slimmer - it’s so great to have a reason (prepaid) to get out and go train - seeing the monthly money go out my bank is good 

I have yet to get rid of 2 of the 3 kg that jumped on my in 3 weeks on the testogel trial but I am eating v well - upping my fr chicken buying to every 3 days and lots of greens 

I have been prescribed the female Tst but waiting for boo&s to get it in - will be £123 for 100 days - will test and see how I go 

2 must dos today that are Pop ‘oat’ outstanding annoying tasks 
So I will do one now and post after gym 

LadyWithAPlan

So after posting  I had a text saying my Androf*m*  (testosterone) was in so thats £124 .. Started today so am tracking weight, mood, allergies etc
I dont need to be putting on  yet more weight so will exercise and eat well and track how I feel on this one as its the female one

I did the ems again  and had a lovely walk there/back in the sunshine today - over 20k steps

I am thinking I may have developed a reaction to sweets (disaster) - having felt great all week and no sweets  - i had some prosecco last night and then bought some harib* and felt huge and for some reason also bought today  some sweets as i did loads errands straight from gym so I had hadnt eaten ,,.. and again bloating, feeling like I am blown up.. so I am off sweets for the next 3 weeks.


I was meant to see a friend this afternoon for a co=project and then pop to a London opening but as I left the house late I text and he then cancelled as he had been on a pub crawl..(!)  I was tired to be honest and used time to go home and do one of big frogs! So  form filled and sent via post office. I have been putting it off for months so go me!
Plus I wasnt in the big drinking mood. I have a lunch tomorrow as well and had a late night to bed yesterday

The other must do hasnt happened today but I did after posting went to buy some useful bits inc some white board cleaner ,,, I have a lot to sort out and am using some downtime this weekend to get clarity.

I told my mum I wasnt coming home for easter - I hadnt confirmed anyway but she was hoping  .. but I need clear head space and really saw how 2 weeks ago being around my father triggers me ... his behaviour was relatively ok but I ate excessively there, got allergic by eating chocolate which I never do at my own home, etc   - obviously eatingh down my feelings and then it took me 4 days after I got home to get properly re balanced ...  my productivity was terrible .. and I dont have the spare days to do it again.

Its difficult as I would see my mum more but I have to put myself first at such a pivotal time - I said I will see her and stay for a day in 2 weeks time so

I am now feeling a glorious Easter stretching ahead of me - seeing friends most days but also giving myself time to train, create, vision board, potter, plan and be happy
that complex ptsd book has been v illuminating  .. i can really see some behaviour patterns emerging with more understanding and compassion.

Happy easter all

KajiKita

What’s the difference between female and male testosterone? I just thought it was all the same hormone …? (I’ve been meaning to ask for ages! 😊) 

Hugs for the triggering response around your dad. I very get that …

KK

skint_spice

Easter plans sound lovely. Well done on realising how your father’s behaviour was affecting you and taking action, it’s not always easy to follow through.

LadyWithAPlan

KajiKita said:

What’s the difference between female and male testosterone? I just thought it was all the same hormone …? (I’ve been meaning to ask for ages! 😊) 

Hugs for the triggering response around your dad. I very get that …

KK

Its interesting I noticed my behaviour then and afterwards  even when he was trying to be nice, I am not at rest around him and get extra triggered when he starts drinking re what awful things often pop out his mouth. 
Enjoy your break and gap between the new job and old

Testosterone
Well tst is tst but the female one is the only one (australian) licensed for women and when you use the male one it has giant signs all over it saying FOR ADULT MALES ONLY.
I had read a fair few menopause books and most of them said get the female one  - you do have to pay for it whilst both male ones you can get on the NHS as part the HRT annual prescription.  £124 is for 100 days. Though the pippet mechanism is weird..

i googled and got this as below - not that helpful  .. however given whilst i loved the upside to the male  tst (more energy, happier, easier to focus) i didnt enjoy the skin inflammations and weight gain.  I changed Ostregen 3 times to find one that suited me (one bloated me and one my body was not taking in properly) - now feel happier  on that so I figure testing the TST's  is a good thing as well. 

'AndroFeme is preferred over Testogel for women because it's specifically formulated and licensed for female use, offering a more tailored and potentially safer testosterone replacement therapy. '
'

• Body-identical testosterone:

  AndroFeme contains testosterone that matches the natural hormone produced by the body, potentially leading to better tolerance and effectiveness, says menopausecare.co.uk. '

'

Is There a Difference Between Male and Female Testosterone?

No. Men and women produce the same kind of testosterone hormone. Interestingly, though, female bodies convert testosterone and other androgens into female sex hormones.

However, the differences between male and female testosterone are

• the part of the body that produces it,
• what normal levels of testosterone are for males and females, and
• the job of testosterone.

For instance, men’s bodies mainly produce testosterone in the testes. But women’s bodies produce testosterone in the ovaries, adrenal glands, fat cells, and skin cells.'

Testosterone. Testogel and Tostran gels and AndroFeme cream are all body identical and are derived from the yam plant or soy. AndroFeme contains almond oil so should be avoided if you have an almond allergy.16 Sept 2024

LadyWithAPlan

skint_spice said:

Easter plans sound lovely. Well done on realising how your father’s behaviour was affecting you and taking action, it’s not always easy to follow through.

Yes as my parents are somehow still together. I wont cut him off completely cos of my mum, but increasingly he has lost friends over the years cos of how he is, whereas mum still has  ones she sees regularly.  I feel so relieved to be having an easter where each day I will see one or two friends but have time to plan.
Happy Easter!

LadyWithAPlan

Happy Easter Friday all - I hope whatever you are planning it’s restful joyous and surrounded by loved ones 

i woke up thinking it was Saturday but then no construction work going on outside - you forget how constant drilling (they putting up buildings next to me ) gets background noise draining 

seeing some lovely friends for lunch so bought a small Freddo Easter egg and a magic painting book for my friends 2 year old - part my london family I am so grateful for - meeting them by Tower bridge to eat overlooking St Katherine’s Dock 

So happy I am home and have time stretched out in front of me to dream /do/plan - I love living on my own - I was aware when I was at my parents how the loudness of the tv /my dad etc I find quite aggressive to my ears - and indeed the noise of all my sisters dogs barking in the morning - think this is partially why I love living  on my own 

Going to do some insanity workout first thing now before my boozy lunch 
Plan to scrub my whiteboards with this cleaner before I leave as well so I can get things moving on vision board and plan my summer travel work thing - many moving parts so 

also feeling the urge to spend some time cleaning up my flat /decluttering and moving life  forward 

Giving my friend some clothes to sell via Vinted she can keep the proceeds  - I never bother- my Vinted sales are not good and she is using all the proceeds for food for her and her kids as her ex not paid any money in 6 months and the UC etc is not helping - so I will use it as an excuse to declutter and see what she can have 

I will put up for sale though a couple china dolls I was gifted as they are valuable 

I was reading on how to look at everything in your home as ‘would I buy this again /do I need it ‘ and then everything else is for getting rid of - so a reverse of ‘should I get rid of it ‘ 
I am really feeling the urge to get things out my home I don’t need 

skint_spice

Someone asked me yesterday if they should keep a couple of tops they bought as they “would do”, I told them to take them back while they could if they didn’t love them! This is my philosophy going forward so I like the would you buy it again question.