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Embarrassing Will - am I required to send a copy (& accounts) to all beneficiaries?

Hi, I'm an executor (and a beneficiary) for a family member.  In their will, among other things, they have allocated the vast majority of the estate to some of their (adult) kids and an embarrassingly pitiful amount to the other (adult) kids.

I know that all beneficiaries have the right to see the will and the estate accounts, but am I under an obligation to send it to them, or can I just wait and see if they ask for it?  

(I'm not aware of any family dispute or ill feeling, it's just that the family member felt closer to some of their kids than the rest, and may not have fully realised how it would appear to the rest. I will of course ensure that the money is distributed according to their wishes.) 

Thanks RedMonty
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Comments

  • anna42hmr
    anna42hmr Posts: 2,897 Forumite
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    You don't have an obligation to show them the will, personally in a situation such as this, i would just say to them or write to them to say you are in the process of executing the will and if they wish to see a copy of it to let you know and you will send them a copy.  That way it will leave the ball in their court so to speak.  

    That said, if probate needed it becomes matter of public record any, and if the siblings are in contact with each other then they will likely find out the inequity of how much each has received any way.  
    MFW#105 - 2015 Overpaid £8095 / 2016 Overpaid £6983.24 / 2017 Overpaid £3583.12 / 2018 Overpaid £2583.12 / 2019 Overpaid £2583.12 / 2020 Overpaid £2583.12/ 2021 overpaid £1506.82 /2022 Overpaid £2975.28 / 2023 Overpaid £2677.30 / 2024 Overpaid £2173.61 Total OP since mortgage started in 2015 = £37,286.86 2025 MFW target £1700, payments to date at April 2025 - £1712.07..
  • p00hsticks
    p00hsticks Posts: 14,599 Forumite
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    edited 14 July 2021 at 5:21PM
    anna42hmr said:
    personally in a situation such as this, i would just say to them or write to them to say you are in the process of executing the will and if they wish to see a copy of it to let you know and you will send them a copy.  That way it will leave the ball in their court so to speak.  

    Personally I wouldn't even do that - if you tell people that you'll send a copy if they ask, someone's bound to ask. I wouldn't say anything about the will - as anna42hmr says, if probate is needed people can get their own copy if they really want one.
    My understanding is that only residual beneficiaries are entitled to see the accounts - but as far as I'm aware the executor doesn't have to send copies to them all, just let them know that they are available if requested.
  • RedMonty
    RedMonty Posts: 123 Forumite
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    anna42hmr said:
    You don't have an obligation to show them the will, personally in a situation such as this, i would just say to them or write to them to say you are in the process of executing the will and if they wish to see a copy of it to let you know and you will send them a copy.  That way it will leave the ball in their court so to speak.  

    That said, if probate needed it becomes matter of public record any, and if the siblings are in contact with each other then they will likely find out the inequity of how much each has received any way.  

    Thanks. Yes it's in probate, and I've recently received the grant of probate and am now gathering in the various accounts & paying debts before beginning distribution. Which is why the question is now at the front of my mind.

    They all know I'm the executor and are OK with that, but I haven't told them they have the right to see the will.  Am I required to do that?   

    (They're unlikely to share details of how much they got - the siblings are from several different parents and are not close to each other.) 
  • tacpot12
    tacpot12 Posts: 9,377 Forumite
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    You would also have the option of suggesting (initially I would suggest to the siblings that are receiving more) that there is potential for the others to remain upset if the family assets are not distributed more equally, and that they should at least consider the idea of a Deed of Variation. If the  Will is varied with the consent of all the beneficiaries, then as Executor you are off the  hook in terms of needed to meet the deceased wishes. 
    The comments I post are my personal opinion. While I try to check everything is correct before posting, I can and do make mistakes, so always try to check official information sources before relying on my posts.
  • securityguy
    securityguy Posts: 2,464 Forumite
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    RedMonty said:

    I know that all beneficiaries have the right to see the will and the estate accounts, but am I under an obligation to send it to them, or can I just wait and see if they ask for it?  
    Neither of those things you thinkg are rights are, in fact, rights.  People have the right to request the will from probate once it's admitted, if they're bothered, but you're not obliged to show them your copy.  And only residual beneficiaries have the right to see the estate accounts on request: if people are entitled to a specific legacy and have received it, that's the end of it.

    Personally, I would refuse to be executor to a will I thought was unjust.  You're not obliged to do it, and although people are perfectly entitled to be as spiteful as they like in their wills, you're not obliged to help them.
  • Manxman_in_exile
    Manxman_in_exile Posts: 8,380 Forumite
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    edited 15 July 2021 at 1:41PM
    RedMonty said:

    I know that all beneficiaries have the right to see the will and the estate accounts, but am I under an obligation to send it to them, or can I just wait and see if they ask for it?  
    ...

    Personally, I would refuse to be executor to a will I thought was unjust.  You're not obliged to do it, and although people are perfectly entitled to be as spiteful as they like in their wills, you're not obliged to help them.

    If you are concerned in any way about executing the will, then I agree with the above post and you should refuse to accept the role of executor if you think the will is unfair in some way.

    Personally, I'd take the view that what the testator decided to do with their property is none of my business even if they have chosen me to be their executor.  It's then my job to execute their wishes as expressed in the will, whether I think they are fair and equitable to all the beneficiaries (or non-beneficiaries) or not.  The testator has trusted you to carry out their expressed wishes, not second guess them or disapprove of those wishes.

    If some beneficiaries have their noses put out of joint as a result - tough...

    Just to add some context, my niece had to execute her father's will (my brother) after her mother had died and he had married a second time.  His second will effectively disinherited my niece and her brother, but she executed it because that's what my brother had chosen her to do.

    Edit:  And personally I'd have no qualms about letting all the benficiaries (and non-beneficiaries if applicable) see the will and accounts even if you don't legally have to do so.  It's better that everybody knows rather than you trying to conceal it in an attempt not to hurt some peoples' feelings.  Better that everybody know what happened.  Seriously.


  • Marcon
    Marcon Posts: 14,930 Forumite
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    tacpot12 said:
    You would also have the option of suggesting (initially I would suggest to the siblings that are receiving more) that there is potential for the others to remain upset if the family assets are not distributed more equally, and that they should at least consider the idea of a Deed of Variation. If the  Will is varied with the consent of all the beneficiaries, then as Executor you are off the  hook in terms of needed to meet the deceased wishes. 
    An option I would avoid at all costs! Why on earth would an executor want to complicate their own life this way? They aren't there to judge whether or not a will is 'fair'.

    OP, just do your bit as executor and distribute the assets in accordance with the will. You don't need to offer anyone a copy of the will (they can download one for £1.50 if they want to), nor do you need to volunteer accounts - wait for a request if anyone asks (and then you only need to provide to 'residual' beneficiaries). 
    Googling on your question might have been both quicker and easier, if you're only after simple facts rather than opinions!  
  • SevenOfNine
    SevenOfNine Posts: 2,404 Forumite
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    edited 15 July 2021 at 5:01PM
    Distribute the estate as the Will instructs, as Marcon has said ANYONE who wants a Will copy can buy it from here https://www.gov.uk/search-will-probate best if you direct them there if any ask so all are treated the same with regard to that.

    Residual beneficiaries are entitled to a copy of the accounts, personally I would actually volunteer those, just the basic spreadsheet of income/expenditure, not the whole lot of supporting paperwork!

    It's not for you to make suggestions to beneficiaries to redistribute their inheritance, or how to, IF asked by any why more/less has been given, you might like to share that your understanding was that the deceased felt closer to some of their offspring (or saw them more), but frankly you're best to say "I don't know".

    Sad that the deceased didn't leave a letter explaining their unbalanced distribution, it can be very hurtful, but too late now & it's not your fault. Still, any inheritance is a gift.
    Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
  • Langtang
    Langtang Posts: 437 Forumite
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    Just to add some context, my niece had to execute her father's will (my brother) after her mother had died and he had married a second time.  His second will effectively disinherited my niece and her brother, but she executed it because that's what my brother had chosen her to do.


    Wow. Simply wow. "You're getting nowt, but I want you to give it all to those that are getting some" Not for me to comment, but....

    As an aside, I always thought that you asked someone if they'd like to be an executor - we certainly have. Can you just appoint anyone to do this?
    It'll be alright in the end. If it's not alright, it's not the end....
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