Absolutely Exhausted Please Help

GDB2222

https://flood-warning-information.service.gov.uk/long-term-flood-risk

suziebear1985

deannagone said:

How are you doing?  I know it feels like you are taking on an unfair world on your own but we will help if we can and we do care.  The comment above is worth careful thought.  Why I posted is there a way you can make your present home feel better for you.

When I was being evicted, I posted some frequent and very stressed threads on here and people really did try to help.  This site really kept me going (thank you everyone).

Referencing other replies and the above, the other problem with private rentals is stability.  Having to move after your tenancy period is up because the LL wants to sell.., or whatever reason they give (and my private LL was one of the iffy ones too, very stressful dealing with him).  I am now in social housing, and while its not in brill condition, the rent is cheap, their reactions to things a bit more certain and its mine unless I do something awful. Unfortunately I'm not in a position to buy now, even shared ownership.  

With private rentals you could be moving every year (not that that happens often though, but you are definitely going to be moving you and your children more often than you would in a house you own.  This can cause problems with schooling. 

I wouldn't advise anyone going into social housing unless there was no choice though.  The process is quite stressful.

I'm still just about hanging on in there. I haven't heard anything back as of yet so I'm assuming the sesrch isn't back yet although hoping it won't be too much longer. I think it's the uncertainty I'm finding worse than anything, I do suffer with anxiety from time to time so this situation is just exacerbating everything. A little part of me is still hoping things might go through and that I'll still be able to move into the purchase property. We are pretty much there with everything on the cusp of exchange it's just whether it happens. I checked the flood risk website and as predicted the property is high risk for flooding from rivers and surface water. I feel upset that this was never flagged to me when I bought the property as now I feel like I might be stuck with an unsellable home although I don't think searches were quite so thorough when I bought back in 2006.

At this point I most definately would be willing to walk away from a property that cost me £85000 for the £57000to cover the mortgage. I know it sounds crazy but I dont physically need the money for the purchase and it just feels like a sling around my neck. It's not just the house it's the area too. When I bought it was a nice street full of elderly people. Over time they have all passed away and have been replaced by low quality rentals and social housing. All you can hear at night is drunk people arguing or police raids for drugs. No one looks after their properties and I feel so unsettled all the time especially as a single parent. That's another reason I'm so desperate to go.
. 

suziebear1985

jazzyja said:

You sound alot like a situation I was in.....but mine was alot different in that I was renting.
My old house both my children were born there and shared a room. I loved the house but my ex also left me and chose to never see his children again and the pain and misery he caused to both myself and my children just tainted the entire house. It felt almost haunted and that sick feeling when you have to look at them same walls and that same kitchen etc that you relate to so much misery and pain. 

I was that desperate to get out I would of had ANYTHING quite literally. I was in a state of desperation like yourself and anything to get me away from that house......thats my biggest regret. I picked another house that was bigger but really not nice and now I've lived in this run down rubbish rented house for far too long with the world's worst landlord all because my mental state completely took over my capacity to think straight....you need to calm down and look at this logically. Dont rush into things and make the same mistakes I did. Just hang on and think of the end and a nice fresh start. 

It's just so hard isn't it, knowing what the right decisions are. Everything seems quite scary and stressful. I definitely ately don't want to go into rented long term as I'm looking to buy and hoping the purchase can happen. I feel like I so desperately need that fresh start for us all though.

deannagone

Keeping everything crossed for you x x 

Aspiration

Hi OP,

 It feels really stressful but you’re doing the right thing to see what comes back and then go from there.

I wouldn’t say anything to the estate agents etc yet, see what comes back.

 Thinking of you and keeping fingers crossed you hear shortly!

tdawber

All the unknowns are so stressful, I feel for you. Don’t panic and I know you don’t wanna be there anymore, but just hang in there, it will be worth it. 
A flood risk search is a standard search, I wouldn’t worry, all properties for sale should have them done 👍

lesalanos

Hang in there,  try to find somebody who you can talk to about the issues raised by the buyers etc.  This is where the EA should help more at times 

chrisw

I'm struggling a bit to envisage a house that was worth £85k 15 years ago is now only worth £72k?

It would be very unusual, is there a reason for it other than the possibility of flood risk?

london21

suziebear1985 said:

deannagone said:

How are you doing?  I know it feels like you are taking on an unfair world on your own but we will help if we can and we do care.  The comment above is worth careful thought.  Why I posted is there a way you can make your present home feel better for you.

When I was being evicted, I posted some frequent and very stressed threads on here and people really did try to help.  This site really kept me going (thank you everyone).

Referencing other replies and the above, the other problem with private rentals is stability.  Having to move after your tenancy period is up because the LL wants to sell.., or whatever reason they give (and my private LL was one of the iffy ones too, very stressful dealing with him).  I am now in social housing, and while its not in brill condition, the rent is cheap, their reactions to things a bit more certain and its mine unless I do something awful. Unfortunately I'm not in a position to buy now, even shared ownership.  

With private rentals you could be moving every year (not that that happens often though, but you are definitely going to be moving you and your children more often than you would in a house you own.  This can cause problems with schooling. 

I wouldn't advise anyone going into social housing unless there was no choice though.  The process is quite stressful.

I'm still just about hanging on in there. I haven't heard anything back as of yet so I'm assuming the sesrch isn't back yet although hoping it won't be too much longer. I think it's the uncertainty I'm finding worse than anything, I do suffer with anxiety from time to time so this situation is just exacerbating everything. A little part of me is still hoping things might go through and that I'll still be able to move into the purchase property. We are pretty much there with everything on the cusp of exchange it's just whether it happens. I checked the flood risk website and as predicted the property is high risk for flooding from rivers and surface water. I feel upset that this was never flagged to me when I bought the property as now I feel like I might be stuck with an unsellable home although I don't think searches were quite so thorough when I bought back in 2006.

At this point I most definately would be willing to walk away from a property that cost me £85000 for the £57000to cover the mortgage. I know it sounds crazy but I dont physically need the money for the purchase and it just feels like a sling around my neck. It's not just the house it's the area too. When I bought it was a nice street full of elderly people. Over time they have all passed away and have been replaced by low quality rentals and social housing. All you can hear at night is drunk people arguing or police raids for drugs. No one looks after their properties and I feel so unsettled all the time especially as a single parent. That's another reason I'm so desperate to go.
. 

Really strange that the value has dropped over time. I will say hang in there, you should aim to at least break even or as close as possible. If you are looking to buy another property will need as much as you can get and take your time with this in order not to regret in the future.

Take your time especially with finding the next right property.

suziebear1985

Hi,

Just to update I'm still in limbo. The effect on my mental and physical health has been huge to the point where I'm now on medication and have also needed referral to an eating disorder service.

The report came back and was then apparently sent to the lenders on 16/07/21 so that they could make a decision as to whether they would still lend. I really want to walk away from it all despite the fact I'll lose money as I know my health is very badly affected but everyone tells me to hang on in there as it will be over soon.

I have no idea why the value has dropped so remarkedly. A lot of houses on the street have been sold very cheaply over the past few years, some for as little as £50,000 despite it not being a bad area or anything. I can only assume that when they've looked at the value other houses on the street have sold for they have priced it in accordance with that. Either that or I was fleeced 15 year ago with the price I paid.