Don't know what to do!!

15 Posts

Afternoon all, just looking for some advice regarding my debts. I have been paying small payments towards my debts for a good few years now all defaulted. Spoke to step change they recommend bankruptcy as i rent and 46k debts. I wanted to go down this route for some time but always to afraid basically i owed my parents 12k Last year i came into some money (redundancy) a gave my parents 8k to help with my guilt of owing them. I am willing to go bankrupt but this is holding me back the risk that my parents will be made to pay the money back and receive letters/calls and that.
So any advice on if i should go bankrupt or carry on as i am paying small token payments
Thanks👊
So any advice on if i should go bankrupt or carry on as i am paying small token payments
Thanks👊
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If you have already spoken to Stepchange and they have recommended bankruptcy, I'd be inclined to go with that advice as they know what they are talking about, they wouldn't recommend bankruptcy unless they truly believed it was the best option.
]With £46k worth of debts, even if your creditors agreed to accept small token payments, you'd probably be paying of the debts for the years and years/the rest of your life.
If you go bankrupt the payment to your parents will probably be seen as preferential payment and the Insolvency Service may approach them to ask for it back - but if they don't have it, they can't pay it. For minor "offences" such as this you might get a Bankruptcy Restriction Undertaking/Order (BRU/BRO), but all that means is that you will still be under some of the same conditions of bankruptcy (such as not being allowed to apply for credit of more than £500 without letting the lender know you're bankrupt) for a couple more years after discharge - I don't imagine it would make much difference to your life. Check this out - https://debtcamel.co.uk/bankruptcy-restriction-order-bro/ (Debt Camel is a useful site).
I decided to accept StepChange's advice and went for the DRO. It is almost the same as a Bankruptcy, just on a smaller scale but it remains on your credit file for six years, same as a bankruptcy. However, now it's all over, I have a fresh start and it's amazing. You are keeping yourself in such a position that you will never be able to have a fresh start. I know how easy it is just to stay in the same circumstances because of fear of change but I realised that I had to do something or I'd never be free of the financial millstone around my neck. As a result of having a DRO I had to have a basic current account (for naughtly people, as I thought) with no overdraft facility. I had to learn how to budget and make sure I never went overdrawn or there was a fee to pay. My debit card wasn't even contactless. I was annoyed about such restrictions at first but I did get used to budgeting and am now much better when it comes to handling my finances. It had been quite a shock going from two incomes to one low income with a child to raise.
If your parents do know most of it and you declare bankruptcy, nobody is going to chase, follow, pester or harass them. Or you, for that matter. Your parents will not be involved - unless they open your post or answer your phone. I'm assuming you are someone over the age of 18 - you're an adult and if you want to keep your own affairs private and confidential, your parents will surely understand and respect your wishes? We all want our parents' approval but sometimes we have to just live our own lives and hope they will be as supportive as they can be if we get into bother.
It's really difficult to take the first step, I know but you did that already when you contacted StepChange. Don't give up now when you have a great opportunity to make your life so much better. Bankruptcy is not the big disaster it used to be and it's not the end of the world.
Your options are not limited at all. What's difficult to understand is why you would want to remain in financial hell when there is a tried, tested and recommended way to escape. Surely your parents wouldn't want you to suffer?
I rent married with 2 young children.
Ive looked into all the restrictions i dont think it will bother me now as i have lived without credit for couple of years or so now. I just dont want my parents to be contacted saying they have to pay the money back basically.
https://www.gov.uk/guidance/technical-guidance-for-official-receivers/31-antecedent-recoveries
Bankruptcy is the obvious route but there is this complication and it would have been better to discuss this with stepchange
I can think of two other options that they might have discussed - not necessarily easy or guaranteed a good outcome:
This is the reason why i cant go bankcrupt.
I have 4 creditors total 2-3 years old they are now i pay £5 to each. Tbh i rarely here from them its not been to bad but obviously all that debt i owe is still hanging over me and it does play on my mind alot.
Obviously the longer the gap between the 'preference' and the bankruptcy application, the less likely things are
If your parents no longer had the cash then it's less likely.