Understanding what an executor of a will does

[Deleted User]

Hi -
I'm sorry to sound really thick with all of this but it's not a subject I know a lot about at all. My father has recently started discussing more about his and my mother's wills and concerns they have to do with family relationships after they pass. I hate them even discussing all of this but I know it's necessary to understand their wishes for the future and that they are anxious about it.
I am the youngest of 4 siblings. My father has explained that they altered their wills from originally having my eldest sibling as executor, they then thought this wasn't fair and they felt it could create more bad feeling between siblings. There is a bit more of a fragile relationship between my one sibling and the other two. They are all very much on friendly terms at the moment but there is a lot of underlying situations that my parents are rightly concerned may appear eventually and they don't want to exasperate it during a difficult time.
Their answer was to make us all joint executors as well as joint beneficiaries. It was the first I heard about this recently. I'm worried about what this really means and personally I'm concerned it could actually make the situation worse if there is a dispute. Surely it could essentially become 'stalemate'.
Am I right to be concerned or is this a fairly normal thing to have all joint executors who are also beneficiaries? I trust my eldest sibling and I would be happy for him to be executor but I do think perhaps the middle sibling may have more of an issue with it. The estate would be quite complex I fear so not even just a simple 'sell the house and split'. 
What is the actual role of the executor and am I right to think this could get complicated?
Thanks in advance

gettingtheresometime

I know the rule of thumb says avoid having solicitors as executors (for cost reasons) but where family candidates for the role don't get on, imo, it's money well spent.

naedanger

I suggest your parents speak to a solicitor about their wills and tell them of their desire to avoid their wills leading to any conflict between their children after their death. 

The solicitor should be able to advise what can be done to reduce this risk. Appointing a professional executor is likely to be the most significant step but there will be others e.g. reducing the amount of discretion in how the assets are to be distributed, perhaps ensuring the will (or a side letter) explains the rationale for items in the will etc

RAS

Edit: I answer to your initial question, executors do what the will tells them to do. The exact outcome depends on how flexibly or otherwise the will is written and how much discretion they are given.

You may well be right to be concerned with the family dynamics. A lot will also depend on how the will is worded as well. "Inherit the house in equal shares" is very different to "sell the house and receive equal shares" for example. MSE is littered with cases where one child thinks the former gives them the right to occupy the parental home or to stymy a sale.

Your parents need to have a frank discussion with a solicitor who can advise on how to word the will effectively and if they don't want a professional executor, it may be wise look outside their children. And leave a small consideration to the executor(s).

kuratowski

Deleted_User said:

What is the actual role of the executor and am I right to think this could get complicated?

In terms of just this question, there is a very simple explanation here

https://www.gov.uk/probate-estate 

You can't control what your parents put in their will, but do encourage them to use a solicitor.

And they should also putting in place consider advance directions, and powers of attorney.

RetSol

Your parents need to have a frank discussion with a solicitor who can advise on how to word the will effectively and if they don't want a professional executor, it may be wise look outside their children. And leave a small consideration to the executor(s).

This is good advice, @Deleted_User. 

I also suggest that your parents don't keep the wills at home. Deposit the wills with solicitors or at the Probate Registry and inform all the executors where the wills are.  This will help to ensure that the executors can apply for probate promptly when the time comes and avoids disputes about which versions of the wills are the valid ones.

Keep_pedalling

You only have to read some of the threads on this board to see what sort of chaos squabbling sibling executors can cause. As as already been suggested they could appoint a solicitor, or they  could appoint one sibling they trust to carry out the task, and appoint one or more of the others as back up executors.

MovingForwards

Just because you're named doesn't mean you have to act when the time comes. There's nothing wrong with renouncing (stepping down) or having power reserved (only acting if something happens to the others).

Definitely one for a solicitor to draw up, not a will writing firm or home prepared, to ensure all the right things are covered, limiting potential arguments and discussing the best options.

[Deleted User]

@MovingForwards thanks for this. It's something I've realised after doing some research last night. Unfortunately I am the one placed in the middle with every situation and the mediator and I know it will come down to me to referee / 'fix everything' which is why it's concerning me even more. Me stepping down, although it's what I would like to do, would probably have the opposite effect.

I appreciate the responses of everyone here. The logical answer would be in terms of a solicitor but I know there's no way my Dad would go for it. He's someone who has always always been thinking about the legacy he will leave and sees solicitors as money grabbing and dragging things out for their own benefit and it's the last thing he will want to do. He sees it as money pouring down the drain.

I have read plenty of the posts on here of squabbling siblings and it's exactly what I want to try and prevent from happening but I don't think there's going to be an easy answer. My father for a while has wanted me to go over and help him put his paperwork in to a proper order, understand where things are and how things are written out in wills etc so I've got more of awareness to make things easier. He wanted this before Covid and then we've never had a good opportunity (as it will be a big job with his paperwork!) but this may be beneficial and maybe I can talk to him more about my concerns then. I feel like he has suddenly aged a lot more in the past two years and these things are stressing him out far more than they ever used to so I also want his mind to be at rest because I know it's bothering them both at the moment.

RetSol

The estate would be quite complex I fear so not even just a simple 'sell the house and split'. 

All the more reason to consult solicitors.

xylophone

Encourage your parents to see a solicitor  specialising in wills and trusts so that their wills can be  expertly drafted and thus avoid any ambiguity regarding their wishes concerning the disposal of their estates.

https://content.step.org/step-directory

With regard to the executorship, given the situation you describe, would it not be better for you to be named as sole exor with a solicitor backup if you are unable to act?