Money Moral Dilemma: Should I challenge my neighbours over damage to my car?

MSE_Sarah

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

I was washing my windows when I heard a noise outside. I looked up to see a car close to mine, but the driver reversed and drove off. Later I noticed my bumper was damaged. I can't prove who did it but I know it was one of my neighbours or someone visiting them. Should I tackle this and try to find the person responsible to get them to pay for repairs, even if it risks causing bad feeling, or let it go?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't always answer money moral dilemma questions as contributions are often emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be a point of debate and discussed at face value.

  If you haven’t already, join the forum to reply.

  Got a Money Moral Dilemma of your own? Suggest an MMD.

Ebe_Scrooge

MSE_Sarah said:

I can't prove who did it but I know it was one of my neighbours or someone visiting them.

If you have no proof, how do you know who did it?  You saw a car close to yours, but you don't even know for sure it was that car that hit your car.  If you'd seen the car hit yours then you'd at least have something to speak to your neighbour about; as it stands, you've got no reason at all to even start an argument.

Herzlos

Without any evidence or knowing who it was, it's a waste of time.

BOWFER

If it was a neighbour, easy enough to check for corresponding damage on their cars.

Katecooks

You're just playing the blame game because it makes you feel better to accuse someone. How do you know it was anything to do with your neighbours and not just a passing car who decided to reverse in their drive to do a u-turn? 

Jade999

Why don’t you ask them if they saw what happened? Therefore not accusing them and you can gauge their reply. It is an offence to drive off after an accident, exchange details and not report it

Doglovinlady

I agree with Jade999. It’s a tricky one though and best tackled in a conversational tone as opposed to an accusatory one. That way, the neighbour is more likely to be sympathetic and therefore more inclined to say if they know anything about it. Hope you have a satisfactory outcome, but be prepared not to! Nothing worse than bad feeling with neighbours. Good luck.

REJP

Op can’t prove who damaged car.  This is why you have car insurance. Use it unless the repair estimate is less than your insurance excess charge.

Octavia22

You’ve got no proof so y would you start an argument?  Bad feeling with neighbour not worth it with no proof accusation.

gloriouslyhappy

I'd mention it to the neighbour as a friendly update - something like 'BTW, careful where you park your car, mine's got some damage, think someone reversed into me while turning around. Don't suppose you saw anything?' That way you allow them to open up - if they know anything - without making it an accusation. If they do know something but say nothing to you, they will have noted that you noticed, and will be aware that you keep a close eye on things, thus possibly preventing a similar incident on another occasion.

Benthebadger

If it was your neighbour, wouldn't you have recognised their car? Worth a mention to them in terms of a moan about how you had a "hit and run" outside your own home but I think that's how you may have to treat the incident.