IVA settled post separation, can I ask my ex to pay half of the settled amount?

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in IVA & DRO
My wife and I entered into an Joint IVA when we were together as we had no way of coping with our level of debt, around £20k. Part of this IVA was £11k of debt from a previous relationship that my wife had described as "only a few thousand" when we met, I was shocked to say the least when I found out the truth.
We separated just over two years ago and when we parted I contacted the IVA Practioner to explain that we had split and that there was no way I could maintain payments. I discovered that the 3 payments breaks that we had where in fact only 2 and we were 11 months in arrears and that she had deceived me over the situation. It was an abusive relationship in which she financially controlled me.
My ex ignored attempts to contact her, then refused to fill out any I&E and when I finally managed, after 6 months of trying, to get her I&E she was surprised that a meeting of creditors was being called to address the IVA. At the time I received some large settlements from payday loans and was able get the IVA discharged on the basis of these payments and the fact that neither of us would be able to make any further payments meaning we would need individual agreements or apply for bankruptcy. Thankfully my proposal was accepted and the IVA was discharged.
Now, we are trying to resolve our financial matters through meditation and I feel that the £3k I paid into the IVA should be acknowledged by her and that she should pay me half of it back. If I had not made this payment then an option would have been to separate our debts and resolve them individually. Considering the split was around 70/30 she has benefited greatly from the IVA being settled by my actions and hard work in pursuing the PDL settlements.
I feel that she should pay me half of the amount, especially given that she made no contribution to the final settlement and her poor management of the IVA nearly caused the agreement to fail. Upon completion she was left debt free, which is considerably better than the alternative.
Thanks for thoughts and comment.
We separated just over two years ago and when we parted I contacted the IVA Practioner to explain that we had split and that there was no way I could maintain payments. I discovered that the 3 payments breaks that we had where in fact only 2 and we were 11 months in arrears and that she had deceived me over the situation. It was an abusive relationship in which she financially controlled me.
My ex ignored attempts to contact her, then refused to fill out any I&E and when I finally managed, after 6 months of trying, to get her I&E she was surprised that a meeting of creditors was being called to address the IVA. At the time I received some large settlements from payday loans and was able get the IVA discharged on the basis of these payments and the fact that neither of us would be able to make any further payments meaning we would need individual agreements or apply for bankruptcy. Thankfully my proposal was accepted and the IVA was discharged.
Now, we are trying to resolve our financial matters through meditation and I feel that the £3k I paid into the IVA should be acknowledged by her and that she should pay me half of it back. If I had not made this payment then an option would have been to separate our debts and resolve them individually. Considering the split was around 70/30 she has benefited greatly from the IVA being settled by my actions and hard work in pursuing the PDL settlements.
I feel that she should pay me half of the amount, especially given that she made no contribution to the final settlement and her poor management of the IVA nearly caused the agreement to fail. Upon completion she was left debt free, which is considerably better than the alternative.
Thanks for thoughts and comment.
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Sometimes, for the sake of your sanity, it's just better to cut your losses, learn from the mistakes and say goodbye and good luck as you go forward and get on with the rest of your life.
It seems unfair, yes but it appears that you have had a lucky escape. Don't get bogged down in any more of the dross that follows a split. I've been there and done that and it is just not worth it. There are never any real 'winners' in situations like this. You have to know when to let go and I think you know that.
Doesn't sound like she has any inclination to pay and you would remain stressed out
Thanks.
The clue is in the name, "Individual Voluntary Arrangement".
Do you mean you had two separate IVA`s ?
More than a third of IVA`s fail....fact.
Could A Debt Relief Order help you ?
Never pay for a Debt Management Plan.
For free debt advice, contact either : Stepchange, National Debtline, CitizensAdviceBureaux.