Alleged debt upon separation.

carlos1973

I am currently going through mediation with my ex and she has thrown a spanner in the works.  She has claimed that since we got together her parents have lent us over £12k and are now claiming that I owe her parents £4k.  Whilst I acknowledge they helped out over the years I do not know how often and to what extent, my ex was financially controlling and never gave me details of our finances.  I was also under the impression that certain items, baby prams, couches etc were gifts to the family and not loans.
Curiously, the value of items and assets that I am asking from her comes to around £4k and other then this loan she is not asking for any money from me.  I suspect that this loan is simply to negate and cancel out any amount she owes me.
Is this alleged loan enforceable if she cannot provide the details and given that until last week I had no knowledge of it?

Thanks.
 

[Deleted User]

carlos1973 said:

I am currently going through mediation with my ex and she has thrown a spanner in the works.  She has claimed that since we got together her parents have lent us over £12k and are now claiming that I owe her parents £4k.  Whilst I acknowledge they helped out over the years I do not know how often and to what extent, my ex was financially controlling and never gave me details of our finances.  I was also under the impression that certain items, baby prams, couches etc were gifts to the family and not loans.
Curiously, the value of items and assets that I am asking from her comes to around £4k and other then this loan she is not asking for any money from me.  I suspect that this loan is simply to negate and cancel out any amount she owes me.
Is this alleged loan enforceable if she cannot provide the details and given that until last week I had no knowledge of it?

Thanks.
 

I very much doubt the alleged loan is enforceable as it probably wasn't a loan in the first place.  What evidence can your ex or her parents provide that the money was a loan at the time?

It's probably tit for tat on the £1500 you want her to pay for the settled IVA.

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6259730/iva-settled-post-separation-can-i-ask-my-ex-to-pay-half-of-the-settled-amount

carlos1973

Thanks for your reply.
I've not mentioned the IVA settlement yet but the the amount I've asked from her is around £4k for my share of possessions in the home and money in bank accounts etc.  She has not asked for anything from me other than around £200 of child maintainence so making up this loan evens out the money we would owe each other. That makes it even more suspicious.

TBagpuss

If you can't agree, it would be a matter of fact -
It's reasonable to ask to evidence. E.g. - 

- when was the alleged loan provided ?
- what evidence does she have - e.g. copies of bank statements showing it' receipt
- what evidence is there of it being a loan? (e.g. evidence of regular repayments after it was received)

It's not uncommon for people to suddenly decide that their gifts were actually loans, when a relationship breaks up, so courts do tend to be fairly sceptical unless there is good evidence that it was a loan.

Also, even if it is a loan, the court may see it as a 'soft' loan - i.e. one where repayment is unlikely to be demanded, or any enforcement actin taken, and which doesn't show up on credit checks etc.