Electronic Banking

Please can anyone help this OAP to understand electronic online banking?  I recently switched to an 'ethical' bank which has proved to be a nightmare over making an International Payment to an EU country in euros.  22nd March tried to make an online payment but the website is not clear about the input of data so after three attempts were rejected drove into the City Centre open branch and gave all the printed details (the IBAN and BIC) which took an hour to resolve.  Returning home received a phone call from the banks International Payment to seek clarification of the data where I spelt each required character phonetically.  Told (getting mixed messages) takes 3-5 days to effect a transfer.  This is weird as with the old bank a transfer would be executed with a couple of hours  Questioned the new bank time scale being told they use a SEPA being a 'Swift' Payment.  Today (29th March) the transfer has still not been received by the recipient.  Told I must wait 10 working days before a trace can commence (I would be charged £20) - even more weird on Friday 26th received in my account a 'foreign' credit of £148.60p (having debited £281.58 for 315€) questioning if this was part refund of the international payment - seems to be the bank tells me.- even though I do not recognise this credit.
Having no confidence in this bank - I opened a new account with my old bank transferring funds from the new bank and using exactly the same IBAN and BIC this morning made an International Payment which is now in the recipients bank.
Please help me understand the differences where the old account was with, what was essentially a Building Society, with the new bank being solely an established bank so why the differences of quality of service and why does the new bank customer service is so indifferent.  

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