Child’s Savings 18 March 2021 at 9:52PM in Marriage, relationships & families 9 replies 651 views

RichKiddy

I have a wayward daughter, for whom money is like water through her fingers.

Her grandparent has saved money for her in her name over many years, but she is coming towards 21 when the money will be hers.

Is there a way to keep this money from her, or move it away, or do something until she can look after her own money responsibly?

wannabe_a_saver

No.  She's an adult, adults have the right to make bad decisions I'm afraid. 
I'm fairly sure she could have accessed the money at 18 if she'd wanted to. 

68ComebackSpecial

It's probably too late now but the money could have been invested via a discretionary trust where the funds can only be released with the agreement of the trustees. This is how the majority of my daughter's money is held as the sum invested is pretty substantial.

ratechaser

Assuming it's in a bog standard savings account then yes of course she could have accessed it at 18. I know there are accounts that will allow children to retain them till 21 - Monmouthshire BS has one - but it's still under their control from 18...

TBagpuss

No, it's hers and I'm afraid that that means she gets to decide how to use it.

You (or her grandparent) could of course *suggest* to her that she puts it into a LISA, or pension, or other form of longer term savings, but it's up to her. Of course, she's more likely to listen if the suggestion is made without any criticism of her spending habits. 

Spendless

Is she aware of this money? You can't do anything to prevent her having it if it's in her name, but if she doesn't know about it, it could be handed over with recommended suggestions for it. 

justworriedabit

RichKiddy said:

I have a wayward daughter, for whom money is like water through her fingers.

Her grandparent has saved money for her in her name over many years, but she is coming towards 21 when the money will be hers.

Is there a way to keep this money from her, or move it away, or do something until she can look after her own money responsibly?

I guess the only thing you can do is to remind here as carefully as possible ie without winding her up. The only words of comfort I can give is you are not alone in this situ. Easier said then done, if/when she has lost all of the money and more, NEVER bail her out as that will just make it worse . good luck.

burlingtonfl6

You can't protect people from their own stupidity.
Teach her a lesson that isn't popular in todays ''blame everyone else'' society
Let her learn that her decisions have consequences and they're of your own making

Pollycat

We have been saving money for my sister's children since they were born, although not in their names.

That means we can choose when they will have the money.

One child is over 18 and - just like the OP's daughter - would have wasted that money within a few weeks of having it.

We are waiting for a suitable time to hand over the money, it may well be that both of them receive the money at the same time, despite a few years difference in ages.

justworriedabit

burlingtonfl6 said:

You can't protect people from their own stupidity.
Teach her a lesson that isn't popular in todays ''blame everyone else'' society
Let her learn that her decisions have consequences and they're of your own making

Very true. I have to add as stated before that when it's your child, it's easier said than done but the child has to learn. 
I've seen parents but their children cars, the pay for the service, etc, etc. The best way is to give them nothing other than what is essential uni fees/help, and associated costs within reason and then if they want a car, their own home, holidays, tell them go for it. If they go on hols or buy a car on the never, never, kick them out or charge them proper rent as they may teach them that taking for granted the house they live in is worth a lot of money. Some will say I'm going and staying with friend, that does not last long as every works out freeloaders and move on.
It's a sad world that many in the UK want everything today or what you have but little incline to work, save, spend wisely.