Help! Potential divorce dilemma.

SMB871

Very long story, so I’ll get to be brief. My Husband has recently shared that he no longer loves me, and although we’re trying to work through things with counselling, I’m not feeling optimistic. 

I have some financial concerns from the break up, due to family circumstances. We have a 20 month old daughter, so I work as a nurse part time with a modest wage of £16,800 a year, 20hrs p/w.

If we sell our house and split the equity (not masses as we only moved a month ago), I would have around 20k. 

I would not be able to get another mortgage on my wage, other than shared ownership, which I’m not convinced by in our local are. Even with child maintenance, I would need to claim benefits to be able to find housing and survive. Once my daughter turns 3 and I get some free childcare, things should be easier.

How can I best invest my house 20-30k equity? Obviously I would much prefer to be paying off a mortgage, but i don’t earn enough or have enough cash to be able to do so. Very frustrating. 

Would appreciate some sensitivity in your replies, as it’s a very difficult situation. I’ve never had to claim benefits before and I feel incredibly frustrated that I’m technically having to start again due to being a Mum.

Thanks all!

El_Torro

Your situation is a bit uncertain at the moment, so I wouldn’t tie up the £20k-£30k any more than you need to for now. Personally I would probably stick it all in Premium Bonds. With average luck the return is better than other cash accounts anyway, with the added bonus that you can access the money whenever you want.

I don’t know what effect on your eligibility for benefits this cash will have, worth investigating. There are many experts on this topic in these Forums, though the Savings & Investments forum isn’t where they usually hang out.

barnstar2077

Sorry to hear about your situation.  I agree with premium bonds being the best bet until the dust has settled.  

Thrugelmir

Find yourself a family law solicitor.  Broadly speaking there's no reason why you and your daughter could not remain in the property until such time as she has left full time education.  Primary concern of the court is the welfare of any children. The court by default assumes guardianship of any children during the divorce proceedings and protects their interests. 

Your ex to be , maybe in for a shock. 

Alistair31

Stick the 20-30k in premium bonds and hopefully you can stay with family for a while to build up more of a deposit for when your young'un is in free childcare and you can get back to a full-time salary. 

All the best with your situation. 

Amateurretiree

You may still be entitled to some free childcare depending on what your income is, worth checking out.

wiseonesomeofthetime

Thrugelmir said:

Find yourself a family law solicitor.  Broadly speaking there's no reason why you and your daughter could not remain in the property until such time as she has left full time education.  Primary concern of the court is the welfare of any children. The court by default assumes guardianship of any children during the divorce proceedings and protects their interests. 

Your ex to be , maybe in for a shock. 

I agree with the advice in bold. You need some professional advice and reassurance about where you stand, not the opinions of people on a forum.

Though some may have gone through similar experiences, I very much doubt any two cases are exactly the same.

Not so sure about the "Broadly speaking there's no reason why you and your daughter could not remain in the property until such time as she has left full time education." though, as not sure who/how the mortgage payments would be met during that time.

Spousal maintenance, in addition to child maintenance, may cover it.

All the best for the future, for you and your daughter.

strawb_shortcake

With £20k in the bank you wouldn't be able to claim benefits, I'd be pushing to stay in the family home for as long as possible 

t0rt0ise

I can't think of any benefits you'll get with 20k or 30k in the bank. So don't factor that into your planning.

milton1970

Get a solicitor .. quickly

SMB871

Thanks all!
I think it’s very unlikely I would be able to afford to stay in this house, even though it’s the perfect home (which is why we moved). Even if I had spousal maintenance, I don’t think our mortgage provider would necessarily allow it, but it is something I intend to explore. 

I probably should have mentioned that i would intend to live with my parents for 6 months, and hope that by that time I have enough professional advice to be able to make the best decisions. 

This is the frustrating situation people find themselves In from breakdowns in relationships. I cant get benefits due to my equity, yet I’m unable to invest it back into property because of my low earnings as a single parent. 

All the benefit calculators I’ve explored imply that my future looks best if my husband stays in the property or if it is rented out. If I stay in the property I get no benefits for that either, other than potentially a loan to help with the interest (yay).

Thank you all for your help.