Tell me No! ( to buying big house)

Lummoxley

Greymug said:

Yes it's a big commitment but it's not a life sentence. 

But with stamp duty, moving costs etc, it would be a very large fine. 

Greymug

don't see it as a fine. see it more as the price you have to pay for information. only way to understand if it's the right decision or not.

couriervanman

Greymug said:

couriervanman said:

Or stay where are you and buy a small holiday home abroad

and go on holiday in the same place every year. talk about experiences...

Use it a few of weeks of the year rent out the rest and holiday elsewhere on proceeds....win win

Dark_Star

You say you're in Kent...but do you have to stay there?  If you can go anywhere then maybe look further afield . Kids can go to new schools if you can all work from home... I know bits of Kent & some of it I would not touch with a bargepole even if the house was older, huge, detached & came with acres of land...      Further afield may be the compromise between not upping the budget so much yet still letting you peruse Rightmove!

Greymug

couriervanman said:

Greymug said:

couriervanman said:

Or stay where are you and buy a small holiday home abroad

and go on holiday in the same place every year. talk about experiences...

Use it a few of weeks of the year rent out the rest and holiday elsewhere on proceeds....win win

win win for the taxman and letting agency of whichever country you buy your holiday home in.

and hmrc as well, as it's additional income so I assume it gets taxed here as well? (I may be wrong though...)

Octothorpe

Mickey666 said:

Seems to me the OP should not move simply on the basis of their doubts.

But if it were me I'd go for it.  In fact I did.  I love 'rattling around' in a big house where space is never an issue.  Want to buy a snooker table? No problem, use one of the spare rooms.  Want both sides of the family, parents and kids to stay over for Christmas?  No problem, spare bedrooms for all and no parking problems because there is plenty of space off-road for everyone.  Want a big party but worried about annoying the neighbours?  No problem . . . no neighbours close enough to hear.  No enough room to pursue your hobbies?  No problem, just have a dedicated hobby room.  Garage not big enough for all your stuff?  No problem, just use one of the old stables.  Walk the dog for half an hour and never leave your own land?  No problem.  You get the picture.

My CT is a lower band than the house I moved from (yes, madness I know but that's how the banding system can work), gas & electricity is £195 per month because I don't even try to keep the entire house heated to tee-shirt conditions, besides we only need heating for 4-5 months of the year.  With no mortgage it costs less than £500/month for all the fixed bills - CT, energy, telephone/broadband, mobiles, insurance, which seems a bargain for all the space we have.

It can be done, but it needs a certain mindset.  Being handy at DIY is also useful, in fact being 'generally practical' is almost essential unless you want to spend £200 a time paying tradesmen to do the most trivial jobs around the home.

I've always thought that after health, the two big luxuries in life are space and time.  Space in which you can do whatever you want without interference or constraint and the time in which to do it.

The OP/husband sound as if they're in the prime of their working lives and earning good salaries.  Their decisions over the next 10 years will likely define their standard of living as they move into retirement.  Remember - you can always downsize if the going gets tough but it's far more difficult to 'upsize' (if that's what you want to do) later in life when retirement looms.  Focus on where you want to be 25 years from now because in 25 years time it will probably be too late to improve on where you've ended up.

This made me lol haha!
I don't know about snooker tables and craft rooms, but a room to put husband in during lockdown? Count me in! 😂

Octothorpe

phoebe1989seb said:

We bought a six bed, 3500 sq ft Victorian detached on the south coast of England when we were a similar age to the OP. It was a project house that took ten years to renovate, mostly DIY. The bills were huge and the CT was band F. Our mortgage was massive, taking up far more of our income than most would deem acceptable.

Despite all this, I can honestly say it was the place I've been happiest. There were just the three of us but it never felt too big as we always had friends/family over. DS - who was just eight when we moved there - loved every moment, helping us on the 'building site' at weekends where he picked up many skills he's now using in his own home 😉

We sold it when DS went to uni, downsizing to another more rural project property with a bit of land where we were mortgage-free. CT was actually a higher band (G) and we still had huge bills. I hated it and spent most of my time regretting selling the old place!

We moved again - larger house - but still couldn't capture the feeling of the family home (I realise now this was in part because of DS leaving home/all our parents dying within a short time frame ☹️).

Three years ago we downsized again to a large two bed, very rural 400 year old detached cottage (also with some land) that does have its limitations - so we're building an extension, lol - but finally I've stopped missing the family home and think we'll most likely stay here.

I agree with the previous poster who said you might as well go for it - nothing ventured, nothing gained!

Oh sorry to hear this That house sounds lovely!!

Octothorpe

Notnewnotold said:

I don't regret buying a decent size house (around 2500sq ft) at all despite the maintenance cost that comes with it. In the current situation, it's been a godsend for everyone to have their own space for study/work. Plus plenty of outside space, woodland nearby etc.

This is the new normal - I might go back to the office but never again full time. We need home offices for more than just occasional use. Space space space... as much as you can reasonably afford. Why anyone would want to live in a London shoebox is beyond me.

That's the thing- we've discussed my going part time but with a big house it wouldn't be possible. I used to be so ambitious but now more kid focused lol

MalMonroe

I think you're probably a bit bored during Lockdown and there's nothing wrong with looking, is there? What does your husband think? Does he want to move? 

At the end of the day where you live is only bricks and mortar. Unless you're in a caravan or other abode made of something similar, of course.

It's the people who make it what it is. Is it a happy home? If so, why move? When lockdown's finished take your extra money and take your kids away to different places once, twice or three times a year. Your kids won't mind if you move or not, as long as they have a happy homelife. 

You can't take it with you! And any house you move to will probably be there when you've gone. LIVE! While you can. Life's too short to be hung up about property and things. They don't matter. And to be honest for me, I've lived abroad twice and have moved around here in the UK, I've had enough and couldn't bear the thought of any more upheaval. But that is just me! 

Hope I've helped in some small way. . . Good luck, whatever you do. 

sjeap

We were in a similar position to you - similar age, salary and house values for current/future house. We decided to go for it and are currently in the process of moving but have said that if it doesn’t work out then it’s the worlds way of saying to stay put. It was hard to find a new house because we love the one we are currently in but fortunately the one we are buying is the one house in our village I have admired since I first visited the village. If your husband is on board then go for it - like someone else said it’s not a life sentence and if it doesn’t work out then at least you’ve tried.