Enjoy life while you can.

Cus

I think the man is the original post is just being honest, at least he can admit his regrets, many don't want to, I suspect they want to believe that being  frugal and carefully saving was the right call but deep down they have doubts.

I'm sure if you went to a money spending forum you would have the reverse..

The most likely best path is somewhere in the middle.

DT2001

enthusiasticsaver said:

I would agree with this.  We balanced our spending with saving for retirement and travelled prior to  kids and then again with them when they got out of the baby stage but we also saved into pensions having seen both ends of the spectrum.  

Totally agree about balanced approach but didn’t manage a steady build up of pensions.
Assets were accumulated in property, private company and ISA’s in a somewhat haphazard way as we took opportunities to travel with up to 4 kids from 2 weeks old.
Good for getting on early with Easyjet flights and upsetting the speedy boarders by sitting near them! 24 hour return from NZ with an under 2 (so in bassinet a tad too small for him) on my own was ‘fun’ but the opportunity was probably once in a lifetime.
You can do lots cheaply and enjoyably (as zagfles suggested) on the travel front and the children do look back positively or with good humour on most of it. It is a great education seeing the real world and cheaper than all inclusive.
We buy cars to get from A to B and haven’t moved for 20 years (but did renovate to build up equity).
What leads people down the spend, spend or save, save route? My sister and I were on the save and enjoy side whilst our brother is much more spend, spend.

barnstar2077

Cus said:

I think the man is the original post is just being honest, at least he can admit his regrets, many don't want to, I suspect they want to believe that being  frugal and carefully saving was the right call but deep down they have doubts.

I'm sure if you went to a money spending forum you would have the reverse..

The most likely best path is somewhere in the middle.

No one who hasn't reached retirement yet will know if their own chosen strategy or lifestyle is the right call.  We won't know till we are much older.  If we didn't have doubts we wouldn't be human.  That goes for the big spenders and the frugal alike.  Don't you ever wonder if you are making the right decisions? 

DairyQueen

badger09 said:

@DairyQueen
I so identify with your post. My frugal younger self has enabled me to have the luxury of choice now in my 70s. Tiny inheritance, so everything I have, I have worked hard & saved for. Several very tough years as a single mum, balanced by the huge advantage in a DB pension, earned at the expense of a much higher salary in my 30s - 50s. 

I now have (had😢) the luxury of turning left on flights to visit my son in Hong Kong. I wouldn’t have considered doing that 10 years ago but won’t hesitate if/when it’s safe to do so again. Also at the end (hopefully) of a house move which will make life much easier for us. 

Enjoy your halcyon years. 

Thankyou @badger09. I spotted you over on the 'Waiting to Exchange' thread . Hope the move is going well.

Very best of luck in your new home.

Cus

barnstar2077 said:

Cus said:

I think the man is the original post is just being honest, at least he can admit his regrets, many don't want to, I suspect they want to believe that being  frugal and carefully saving was the right call but deep down they have doubts.

I'm sure if you went to a money spending forum you would have the reverse..

The most likely best path is somewhere in the middle.

No one who hasn't reached etirement yet will know if their own chosen strategy or lifestyle is the right call.  We won't know till we are much older.  If we didn't have doubts we wouldn't be human.  That goes for the big spenders and the frugal alike.  Don't you ever wonder if you are making the right decisions? 

Of course, but one should still have an idea that they are going too far one side or the other during that phase.
My point was after having reached the retirement time, i like that the guy in the first post was honest with himself that he over did it (in this example too frugal)
Many would not admit it to themselves, let alone others.

DairyQueen

barnstar2077 said:

 Don't you ever wonder if you are making the right decisions? 

You can only plan around future probabilities and around possibilities that, if they occur, would spell Grief (capital 'G').

Most can expect to live into their 80s. The chances of one of a couple living to 90+ is 50%. A high enough possibility to need to plan accordingly. Assuming that you will pop your clogs by 90 may not be the best strategy for calculating your retirement finances.

15% of those age 85+ live in care homes and 40% of those require specialist dementia care. These are not happy facts but they need to be faced. Longevity is not without risk. I have seen enough of the care system to want the very best for Mr DQ should fate earmark him. It isn't a probability but relying on state-funded care is something best avoided.   I have reduced life expectancy so the probability is that I will not be joining him. We have therefore planned to fund up to 4 years of private care (average length of stay is 2 years so we have some contingency just in case he hangs around too long past his sell-by date).

The problem with saving sufficient to finance the probabilities of later life is that you need to be so darned young when you need to begin. Who at age 30 could imagine themselves at 50? Let alone 60 or 70? It is so tempting to spend on coveted items in preference to saving for an unimaginable retirement decades in the future, and yet... failure to do so in an age of increasing life expectancy and reducing pension guarantees could spell disaster for the entire final third of your life.

I have never questioned the decision not to overspend on discretionaries as being the right one. Perhaps, like Thrugelmir, I have seen too many earlier generations suffer in retirement through lack of money. Many, but not all, never earned a surplus so saving/building assets wasn't an option. Others (especially of my own generation) have just been plain feckless. Being childless (burdening stepdaughters is worse than burdening your own) and minus wealthy parents/sibs tends to concentrate your mind. No safety net promotes self-reliance and that means sacrificing now for the sake of an unknown but probable future.

DanJ90

This is an interesting one for me as I am at the other end of the spectrum here (Just turned 30 and really only at the start of my investing journey after getting married and buying our house). I am not a massive spender at this point, and my wife is slowly changing her mindset from spending to saving now that she struggles with things to buy!

I currently save 30% of my salary (inc. Employer contributions) into my pension with around £400 per month going into an S&S ISA  (100% equity tracker funds in both). I have found a middling point here where I am investing money that I could spend now but don't really need too, so save and invest rather than wasting it. I also ensure that after all bills (inc. bills/food//holiday money etc.) we both have a pot of money that we can spend on whatever we choose each week so that we are also enjoying life now whilst saving for the future. I know we are extremely fortunate to be able to be in this position at the moment so I am keen on not wasting this opportunity whilst we can - who knows what is around the corner.

A few other points that I think are relevant for my situation:

1)  The quicker I can accumulate my wealth, the option of earlier retirement becomes a possibility. So if I want to retire slightly earlier than planned (i.e. Because of health/lack of drive for work) then there is less risk later on trying to save hard/work until I am 70 when all of the hard work has already been done with compounding working it's magic (hopefully!). I can then spend my early retirement travelling the world if I wanted too.. I have no desire to do this at the moment (not including the pandemic as a reason!)/

2)  The quicker I can accumulate my wealth, the earlier I can start to de-risk my portfolio and become less at risk of big stock market crashes the closer I come to retirement (I would be annoyed at myself having to work an extra few years should there be a crash close to my retirement date, and having a riskier portfolio to catch up because I hadn't saved enough earlier on in my life when I could do so).

I think it easier to look back and wish you had done this that and whatever but I would rather have too much money as I get older than not enough - I've no idea what is in store for me and my family over the next 30/40/50 years so all I can try to control is to be as financially stable as possible.

Terron

Albermarle said:

savingmore said:

interesting thread.   How much do people feel is a good retirement pot? level of income? I know there are other threads on that but interested in folks views here.  still deciding/balancing whether we are good to go now or not,  a couple of years before sp...

This is quite interesting Retirement living standards | Loughborough University (lboro.ac.uk)
There is also a similar Which report.

https://www.which.co.uk/money/pensions-and-retirement/starting-to-plan-your-retirement/how-much-will-you-need-to-retire-atu0z9k0lw3p

Nebulous2

barnstar2077 said:

Cus said:

I think the man is the original post is just being honest, at least he can admit his regrets, many don't want to, I suspect they want to believe that being  frugal and carefully saving was the right call but deep down they have doubts.

I'm sure if you went to a money spending forum you would have the reverse..

The most likely best path is somewhere in the middle.

No one who hasn't reached retirement yet will know if their own chosen strategy or lifestyle is the right call.  We won't know till we are much older.  If we didn't have doubts we wouldn't be human.  That goes for the big spenders and the frugal alike.  Don't you ever wonder if you are making the right decisions? 

Very much so at the moment, having moved house at the weekend and handed in my notice 3 days earlier. 

blisteringblue

Nebulous2 said:

Very much so at the moment, having moved house at the weekend and handed in my notice 3 days earlier. 

Lol, I had exactly that.  Had my best nights sleep the day I handed in my notice in a long time, and then had possible the 3 worst nights sleep the next nights always with the same "Am I doing the right thing" worry.   We wouldn't be human otherwise.
At least my notice isn't a cliff face, it's 3 months so I am half way there now and at lot more comfortable it's the right thing.