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Partner moving into my recently owned house

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Looking for some advice!

I recently bought my first home 2 months ago, and paid a 20K deposit, 2K in legal fees etc. and 2K to furnish it (sofas, bed, mattress, wardrobes etc.!).

We have now decided that my boyfriend who currently lives with his parents will move in next month which we are both excited about, and we are going to split everything (mortgage and bills) 50/50 for 6 months first (we will have a legal agreement drawn up to demonstrate his payments do not give him equity to the property for this time). After this period if all is still going well he will be added to the mortgage. He does not have a deposit payment to contribute so we will have a agreement drawn up with a lawyer at this point to ensure my 20K deposit and any mortgage payments up to that point are protected.

My question is, my boyfriend has been very lucky not needing to pay anything towards my initial 4K costs of legal fees and furnishings but will obviously hugely benefit from both. He had been thinking about renting an unfurnished flat prior to this and would have had to fork out some cost but is now not paying anything. Is there a way when we come to adding him to the mortgage for me to protect my initial large investment to the property so when we eventually sell i will get some of that money back? Or should I be asking him for a contribution seeing as these costs were very recent history? I appreciate I currently own the property but he is now getting full use of everything I paid and worked very hard for!

All advice would be hugely welcomed.


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Comments

  • flashg67
    flashg67 Posts: 4,128 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    If you're protecting your deposit etc, perhaps add in an amount to cover a share of the associated costs? I'm pretty sure you can specify when you add him to the mortgage, what exact percentage share of the house he will own - after all, he will be due his share of equity if you spilt up or sell. What happens if one of you loses your job/becomes ill etc - will you have a legal agreement to pay the other person back?
    I'm trying to think how I'd feel if I was your bf - would I want to pay a share in costs that you had to pay to buy the house in any event, (will you give it back if it doesn't work out?) or for furnishings I didn't help choose (which will only last a few years anyway)? Naturally he's getting the use of stuff - you're a couple living together. Perhaps you could have a rental agreement, or a payment to cover wear & tear ;)
    I guess you're trying to protect yourself, but I don't think you'll cover every eventuality - leave some room for the romance of living together and go with the flow at least a little! 
  • flashg67 said:
    If you're protecting your deposit etc, perhaps add in an amount to cover a share of the associated costs? I'm pretty sure you can specify when you add him to the mortgage, what exact percentage share of the house he will own - after all, he will be due his share of equity if you spilt up or sell. What happens if one of you loses your job/becomes ill etc - will you have a legal agreement to pay the other person back?
    I'm trying to think how I'd feel if I was your bf - would I want to pay a share in costs that you had to pay to buy the house in any event, (will you give it back if it doesn't work out?) or for furnishings I didn't help choose (which will only last a few years anyway)? Naturally he's getting the use of stuff - you're a couple living together. Perhaps you could have a rental agreement, or a payment to cover wear & tear ;)
    I guess you're trying to protect yourself, but I don't think you'll cover every eventuality - leave some room for the romance of living together and go with the flow at least a little! 
    Thanks so much for your reply and I totally take your point about asking him for an upfront payment for furnishings etc. (although he did have a say in picking them as by this point we'd kind of made our minds up he would scrap the renting plans and move in, but because I needed to live there instantly I had to just pay and get it furnished).

    If I can protect the initial investments made in the mortgage agreement when he is added that would reassure me. I just feel that in say 2 years when we sell up to move somewhere else I shouldn't be at a total loss for that 4K and it should count for something. In practice how does that work with a mortgage agreement, can I say (for example) I owe 20% of the property through deposit, 5% through mortgage payments to date and then 2% for initial investments made? So say by that time he owns 4% through mortgage payments I could state I want 27% and he gets 4%?

    Thanks again!
  • missile
    missile Posts: 11,772 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Ask yourself how you would feel if the situation were reversed.
    "A nation's greatness is measured by how it treats its weakest members." ~ Mahatma Gandhi
    Ride hard or stay home :iloveyou:
  • missile said:
    Ask yourself how you would feel if the situation were reversed.
    I think I'd expect to go halves on everything but I've just always found that the easiest way!
  • What is the rational for adding him to the mortgage, if the plan is to move in 2 years? There will costs, including the solicitors fees for the arrangements you want to draw up. With a joint mortgage, if he decides not to pay his half of the mortgage you will still be liable for paying the whole amount while he will still retain his share of the property. 
    Best to keep things as they are with him paying you rent for the next two years and then start afresh with the new property. Hopefully he would have saved up a deposit by then too.
    He is about to come into a 20K inheritance so the rationale was he very soon will be in a position to buy and doesn't want to continue renting unnecessary. He's happy to as a test run but really wants to start investing his money into a mortgage. I personally agree with you to keep it simple but I'm not sure its fair on him to make him rent for a further 2 years if he doesn't have to...
  • CSL0183
    CSL0183 Posts: 286 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Name Dropper
    edited 5 January 2021 at 8:46AM
    Protecting your deposit is fine. 
    Trying to protect your legal fees and furnishings is quite utterly ridiculous. (If you split up, would he take your sofas, microwave and hoover?) You would have had legal fees regardless, write them off. 

    However, perhaps the next time you do have legal fees (through moving, a remortgage, drawing up these deed of trust protections etc) then he can pay them to even things out but personally I would just write them off as my own (not his) expenses and stop trying to self analyse every penny  each other puts in. If you’re thinking about protecting everything you buy the relationship seems doomed before it has really begun. What if he spends more on shopping than you do, or buys more takeaways? What if he does more handyman work and DIY around the home to maintain it? Ridiculous isn’t it?

    Give yourself a shake, protecting your deposit is fine but everything else including this 6 month probation nonsense is quite utterly ridiculous and OTT. 
    You can move him in and he can pay the bills as his contribution? Council tax, Gas / Electric / TV / Internet etc. (Class that as rent money)

    When you are in a position to add him to the mortgage, you get a valuation done at that point and any equity in the property is 100% yours. You then start afresh at that point protecting your equity and going half on everything. 

    He needs to pay to live regardless of where he lives and you having a mortgage on your property doesn’t change that. If he’s paying “rent” money to you then he should just be happy at that and write it off as everyday expenses without expecting any kind of share in the equity until he’s in a position to be added to the mortgage. 
  • CSL0183 said:
    Protecting your deposit is fine. 
    Trying to protect your legal fees and furnishings is quite utterly ridiculous. (If you split up, would he take your sofas?) You would have had legal fees regardless. 

    Perhaps the next time you have legal fees (through moving, a remortgage, drawing up these deed of trust protections etc) then he can pay them to even things out but personally I would just write them off as my own (not his) expenses. 

    If you’re thinking about protecting everything you buy, relationship seems doomed before it has really begun. What if he spends more on shopping than you do, or buys more takeaways? What if he does more handyman work and DIY around the home to maintain it? Ridiculous isn’t it?

    Give yourself a shake, protecting your deposit is fine but everything else including this 6 month probation nonsense is quite utterly ridiculous and OTT. 
    You can move him in and he can pay the bills as his contribution? Council tax, Gas / Electric / TV / Internet etc. (Class that as rent money)

    When you are in a position to add him to the mortgage, you get a valuation done at that point and any equity in the property is 100% yours. You then start afresh at that point protecting your equity and going half on everything. 

    He needs to pay to live regardless of where he lives. You having a mortgage on your property doesn’t change that. 
    I think this is a little unfair! As a young first time buyer, 4K is a lot of money (in fact, it is all my remaining money!!). If he had moved in 2 months sooner at least the furnishings would have been split saving me 1K to breathe a little, I'm now totally pushed financially so I don't think its a totally unreasonable question. You have suggested he pays the next legal fees when we move of 2K so it can't have been unreasonable. 
  • CSL0183 said:
    Protecting your deposit is fine. 
    Trying to protect your legal fees and furnishings is quite utterly ridiculous. (If you split up, would he take your sofas, microwave and hoover?) You would have had legal fees regardless, write them off. 

    However, perhaps the next time you do have legal fees (through moving, a remortgage, drawing up these deed of trust protections etc) then he can pay them to even things out but personally I would just write them off as my own (not his) expenses and stop trying to self analyse every penny  each other puts in. If you’re thinking about protecting everything you buy the relationship seems doomed before it has really begun. What if he spends more on shopping than you do, or buys more takeaways? What if he does more handyman work and DIY around the home to maintain it? Ridiculous isn’t it?

    Give yourself a shake, protecting your deposit is fine but everything else including this 6 month probation nonsense is quite utterly ridiculous and OTT. 
    You can move him in and he can pay the bills as his contribution? Council tax, Gas / Electric / TV / Internet etc. (Class that as rent money)

    When you are in a position to add him to the mortgage, you get a valuation done at that point and any equity in the property is 100% yours. You then start afresh at that point protecting your equity and going half on everything. 

    He needs to pay to live regardless of where he lives and you having a mortgage on your property doesn’t change that. If he’s paying “rent” money to you then he should just be happy at that and write it off as everyday expenses without expecting any kind of share in the equity until he’s in a position to be added to the mortgage. 
    This 100%.

    Will you want half the petrol money for driving to the viewing as well? 😂
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