Tightening the belts for unpaid leave

[Deleted User]

Not in UK so doesn't work like that here - same re completion - we don't have an equivalent of stamp duty holiday here, but thank you for trying to make me feel better

DH made bread but it wasn't that good so whilst we had it for lunch, he is going to need to get some tomorrow.  Literally so. bl00dy. bored.

[Deleted User]

Arghhhhh, so, our milk wasn't delivered this morning as the driver is apparently having to self isolate(!) and we need bread so DH has just gone out to WR and has decided, that because we are going there anyway, he wants to get loads of stuff we don't actually need this week.  I can kind of see the logic and it will still come out the same month's budget but it doesn't help me psychologically.  I think after this, I will have to take control and just go out to get bread/milk as needed.  At least we can get some more formula for DC2 because although we do have some already, I always worry about running out of that because he can't have anything else, whereas DC1 can eat anything really.  So GOD knows how much that will be.  Though we are not going out at present so saving there.  We are also not going to drink (kids permitting!!!) until the weekend so savings there.

He is, however, getting cake making stuff so I am going to (try given I have to watch the littles) get back into baking and make us a few nice cakes.

Going to be another boring day whilst DH WFH and I watch the kids.  DC1 being a real pain in the @rse at the moment and the "terrible twos" really are in full force here.  DC2 is pretty easy thankfully and sleeps through the night from 10-7 most times which is just amazing and I am very very grateful for this as it means I lose my !!!!!! less!!!!

[Deleted User]

DH is back from WR.  £115.53 - WTAF?!!!!!  He has bought 4, yes 4, massive bags of Nachos.  We are doing a set of Nachos as a treat, probably next weekend.  So why the hell do we need 4 bags?!  It's so silly as we won't have enough cheese/soured cream/salsa to make more than a couple of portions.  So why buy 4 bags?!  I also asked him to get cream cheese x 2 for cakes and he got 1, then because he wasn't sure it was the right thing (as it said "soft cheese" rather than "cream cheese" on packet) he got a BLUE cream cheese, blue cheese on a cake?!  Honestly.  I think we might need to go back to me doing the shopping again.  I know we are not going out at the minute but our shopping really is quite stupidly wasteful and full on.

So I am going to go back through fridge, freezer, cupboards and meal plan with what we already have to try and get us through the next 2 (or poss even 3) weeks without having to buy anything else other than top ups of milk, bread and fruit for DC1.

Forgot to mention DC1's nursery is now bl00dy closed so I have the two of them all day every day whilst DH WFH which is really really tough.  Only bonus is we have saved the £560 in nursery fees for this coming month but I'd much rather he was there, to give me a break but also because he gets so so much out of it.  Hoping it will be open again next month.

Blackcats

Oh dear!  Shame about nursery - not easy to look after 2 children while OH is working from home.  Kids tend to make noise and mess and have no real sense of a working day and a non working day.  So much easier in the summer when you can get out and about. 

Nachos, nachos and more nachos at your house!  My OH sets off with a shopping list and comes back with the items on the list and loads of other fairly random stuff - but the same random stuff regularly so we have a lot of jars of gherkins, umpteen varieties of chilli sauce and copious quantities of cous cous which we rarely even eat.  🤷‍♀️

[Deleted User]

@Blackcats - yes, it is difficult and where we are renting at the moment, has a small garden but sadly, we have to move out end March and the place we are going to, does not have any outdoor space at all (though inside is much bigger) and access is very difficult - up 2 flights of outdoor stairs, with kids!!    Where we are, there are literally NO rental properties available at present so we have had to take something which we probably ordinarily would not have.  It's owned by my friend's mum and is £300 a month more expensive than where we are currently (she is already doing us a favour having knocked £500 a month of the usual price) and the utilities will likely be more  Also, as it's furnished already (whereas this place isn't), we might have to pay some storage charges on top for all our stuff.  Not great as it coincides which when I am no longer getting paid, but benefit is that she only wants 4 weeks notice when we want to move out, so if we then do find something to buy, we are not stuck in a lease.  Am so cross at my friend we are currently renting from who won't let us stay as she has someone who wants to take it long term.  I do not get how she just doesn't get how disruptive this is for the kids (and us!).  Anyway, no changing her mind it seems and feel very let down by a supposed friend (wouldn't mind but it's not like we're not paying her market rent and we even offered her more per month to be able to take it longer).  But ultimately, it is me who has let me family down in insisting that we sell our old house (which was a lovely 3 bed detached house with 1/3 acre garden) and having aspirations above my station.  And now we are stuck.

Anyway, yes, nachos.  At least if there is a zombie attack we will be able to throw them at the zombies, we have that many.  I am looking forward to a set at the weekend however.  I feel for you with your DH too, they are a bit "supermarket sweep" hey?! On the plus side, he couldn't sleep so got up at 0330 and made tomato sauce for the pizzas we are going to make at the weekend - smells lovely and will be put in the freezer until the weekend.  Lunch is just sandwiches from stores, then dinner is crispy chicken fajitas (also from stores).  So we are using stuff up which is good.

We are also now isolating as I need to have a covid test due to some symptoms yesterday late morning.  I have it this morning so hopefully we will be out of isolation soon as I don't think I have it.  Also, once I am out of isolation (and feel better), I am going to start couch to 5k as I have not run for a very very long time and just need something for me and to lose some weight (I currently have a Peter Griffin chin) - I know that will make me feel better about everything as it used to be my way of dealing with my depression.

DC1 has asked for so many snacks this morning - he keeps asking for chocolate!!  Needless to say he HAS NOT been given chocolate but have said he can have some if he eats all his dinner later 

[Deleted User]

Had covid test - very unpleasant but over now which is good.  Health Visitor called me earlier as my GP had called her and referred me back because I presented with depression at docs a couple of weeks ago.  She was insistent on prescribing me anti-depressants but I said I didn't want them because I know that my depression is simply situational and is mainly to do with the house.  I also know that because I wasn't able to exercise post-birth that was contributing.  Health Visitor was saying I should be taking them and I said no, I don't want to because I know it's situational.  Presuming I am covid-negative then I will start running tomorrow (even though will be a run-walk to start with) and I know for sure that will help.  I think it's so bad that they try to push pills on you.

If we could just stay in this house I know that I would be fine - the stress of moving AGAIN is really really getting to me and also the fact that I feel so very let down by my friend.  I also know that once we've moved and settled in I will be ok, even if it is not ideal, but I hate limbo!!! And it's like we are in double limbo - limbo over finding a place to buy, whilst knowing we have to move out of here.  Basically sucks.

Sorry, know this is not about spending - just needed to vent.  Oh and DC2 just threw up all over me, causing me to have to change into fresh pyjamas and a fresh robe (not necessarily a bad thing as I probably was a bit whiffy!)

Blackcats

Rebecca - that's hard having to move house.   It must be particularly galling when your friend is effectively choosing another family over yours.  Also, there is no guarantee that the long term renter will actually stay longer than you but as you say the decision is made.  You will be in a good position though when the right house to buy comes onto the market.   you can enjoy more indoor space in the new place.  

Running will be good.  I've been reading a great little book called the self care revolution - it's helping me focus on being the best I can be so I can do my best for others.  I've introduced "micro moments of self care" during the day.  Little things like hand cream, keeping hydrated, a cup of herbal tea in a nice cup etc.   Probably not easy with two little ones but they are micro moments.  

[Deleted User]

@Blackcats - yes, it really is - and you're right, she's chosen another family over ours - there's also no guarantee they will pay the rent either.  I really hope that something comes on soon though.  That book sounds great - think I might try the "micro moments" too!  Even a shower these days is a micro moment of self care with these two!!

Milk delivered this morning which is great as means don't need to go out for provisions.  Covid test was negative thankfully so no longer self isolating!  Lunch will be omlette from stores as we have lots of eggs (and more being delivered friday) and some sandwich meats we need to use up before friday.  Dinner is jacket pots, beans and cheese from stores.  DH is going to use up the blue cream cheese he accidentally bought in his jacket pot!

Heard from the sols re london property - the buyer has raised some queries, only 2 worry me - the building regs one and the freeholder consent one but hoping they will just accept me paying for indemnity insurance and that it can all proceed as planned.  Would be great to just get rid of the hassle/worry of that and also have the cash, but I am not hopeful if I'm honest!!

Have got pay review with work on monday but doubt I'll be getting a raise or bonus (and in any event any raise I won't feel benefit of until september!).  A small bonus would be nice however.  Bit p'eed off as read my review and it said I'm basically excellent at what I do and my output is great but that I tend to work on my own too much (I'm the only one in my jurisdiction so go figure) and also that I didn't participate much in team meetings this year - that's true but is not a fair criticism as they held them when they knew I couldn't attend as I had to pick DC1 up (and outside of my contractual working hours) and also sometimes I had antenatal appointments then.  So am going to make that point on my telephone review on monday.

[Deleted User]

NSD the last 2 (well, bar milk/eggs delivery but not counting that really).  Today, however, will not be.  Dropping birthday present to nephew later (leaving on doorstep and shouting from end of path!) and need to fill the car up with petrol (circa £60, so my share circa £30), probably could do with getting some bread too.

Lunch yesterday was chicken noodle soup and bread from stores.  Had NACHOS mid-afternoon so totally lardy but yummy.  All soured cream now gone however, so need to get some of that if going to have another set (but the seventy million packs of nachos can obviously keep until next big shop).  Then veggie bean burgers and baps for tea, also using up the last of the feta cheese with them.  Today is going to be eggs on toast from stores for lunch then peppered burgers, buns and chips from freezer for tea.

Hoping that apart from bread top ups, we shouldn't need to do a shop until end of next week.  DH is going to make home-made pizza (incl dough) tomorrow.

All very boring as absolutely nothing to do given the whole corona situation.

Survey booked in on london property Monday so that's promising.  Hoping they don't start trying to knock anything off it as they are already getting it for a song.

[Deleted User]

Petrol was only £50.20 (my share £25.10) so that was a bonus.  Didn't get bread today though as that garage didn't have any so will have to nip out tomorrow.  Buyer re london property now asking when tenant leaving and I've had to go back and re-iterate that whilst I have everything lined up to give notice, and will do so, it is costing me £300 and I am not prepared to do it until they have confirmed they are content with all enquiries, survey and lending confirmed because it means I'd have to pay my mortgage and utilities whilst on unpaid leave.  We could do this from savings but obviously don't want to touch those as they are for new house purchase and we already have an extra set of moving costs etc.  If they complete before 31 March it will save them 11k in stamp duty so just hoping that is enough of an incentive for them to press on, since it would be impossible for them to secure anything else now.

Life really is pretty dull at the minute.  Feel totally in limbo with so many things!  But I know things could be much worse.

Annual pay review monday.  Really hoping I get a bonus (even if small) but suspect I won't.  Don't even think there will be a pay rise.  But I do know I am lucky to have a job at present.  DH's review has also been moved to Feb (usually May) so hoping for good news on that front, but again, I do appreciate that we are lucky to have jobs in these climes.