Writing a will - advice would be greatly received second marriages

Bousfield

It is such a complex situation. 
I maybe haven't explained too well but my husband wants a clean break for me from his daughter and ex wife , if he was to die anytime soon. His ex wife causes us so much trouble and he knows she will hound me on his death to give his daughter her inheritance. She wouldn't be waiting until I die. She would make my life a living hell.  By leaving his daughter other assets in his will (should he die first) and no shares in our residential home, will mean I can have a clean break. He then expects me to write a new Will leaving the house and whatever money I have left to my kids. So they would inherit from me.  His daughter wouldn't be in my new Will,  we would be estranged but this would mean she was not dis -inherited as she would have received a substantial amount from my husbands will. 

If I die first my kids inherit my life cover and then my husband  will re-write his will to include my youngest daughter (adopted) 50/50 with his. My older 2 he may leave a small proportion too but I don't expect this. That would depend on his relationship with them after my death. 
This is my husbands thinking. Trying to ensure his daughter has inheritance without tying her to me. This is based on our current situation. (if his ex wife dies before either of us then it would change it all again). 

I have made an appointment next week to discuss with a solicitor. Hopefully they can advice 

Mojisola

Bousfield said:

By leaving his daughter other assets in his will (should he die first) and no shares in our residential home, will mean I can have a clean break. He then expects me to write a new Will leaving the house and whatever money I have left to my kids. So they would inherit from me.
If I die first my kids inherit my life cover and then my husband  will re-write his will to include my youngest daughter (adopted) 50/50 with his.

And if you're both in an accident and you die first and he dies before he can rewrite his will?

xylophone

And if you're both in an accident and you die first and he dies before he can rewrite his will?

The solicitor should cover this scenario.

Mojisola

xylophone said:

And if you're both in an accident and you die first and he dies before he can rewrite his will?

The solicitor should cover this scenario.

To have all these what-ifs pointed out (and solutions offered) is one of the reasons for using a solicitor.

ZaSa1418

Who cares what his ex does, if his will is written well enough she can waste all her money contesting it all she likes she will get nowhere. Make sure your solicitor knows how much of a pain the ex is so the wills are done so she would fail. 

Savvy_Sue

ZaSa1418 said:

Why is your husband only adopting your youngest child? 

I don't think you can adopt a child over 18, and given the length of time it takes it's probably too late for the 17 year old. 

Aranyani

Bousfield said:

My husband doesn't view my  older 2 children  as his responsibility for Inheritance.  He feels that they have a dad and he should be providing more for his own daughter, as he has contributed more money to the marriage.  Its a tough one.  

Your older 2 are still teenagers, if he's been around long enough to feel its appropriate to adopt your youngest, surely he has played some part in their upbringing?  

Think very very carefully about the sibling relationships you would hope them to have if anything happened to you. 

If your husband isn't willing to consider his adopted daughter as exactly the same as his biological daughter then imo he shouldn't adopt her.  Legally there will be no difference and there shouldn't be in any other way other or he is just creating a second tier child who will always be aware of that. 

Aranyani

ZaSa1418 said:

Who cares what his ex does, if his will is written well enough she can waste all her money contesting it all she likes she will get nowhere. Make sure your solicitor knows how much of a pain the ex is so the wills are done so she would fail. 

Exactly this.  His ex wife would have zero power over the situation, you say she would hound you, there are simple ways to prevent this.  I don't think these big decisions should be made based on something so trivial.

Robert_McGeddon

Another point for consideration - if your combined assets are over £1M (and it does look that way) you will jointly leave your beneficiaries an Inheritance Tax bill. It could be substantial. You may want to consider some estate tax planning along with your Wills. Could be from solicitor but an IFA or tax accountant might be preferable. If this were, for example, to involve gifting of some assets now then obviously it would impact on how the Wills are prepared.

TBagpuss

As others have said, talk to a solicitor.

However, if a key concern is how your husband's ex may react then he could consider setting up a life insurance policy to pay her her inheritance on his death, rather than as a share of the house, and could also appoint people other than his ex wife to be her trustees, which would limit his ex's ability to interfere. Of course, all being well, he will be around until long after his daughter reaches adulthood!