British families.

Riley_G

Hey everyone

I've moved over from the USA because my British boyfriend just said to me when he was leaving NY (He was working out there for nearly a year) if I wanted to come to the UK and I just jumped on a plane (I hold a British passport because my mom was born in the UK but moved over here many years ago. I've never been to the UK).

I'm trying to get my head round the whole UK way of life. Wonder if you could help me. My boyfriend suggested I check here.

- Meeting the parents, back home I would take a gift to them and it wouldn't be formal. I've been told here that its very prim and proper. Can anyone give me the low down?
- Why do I have to get a sponsor/reference to get a bank account. My boyfriend had to vouch for me at his bank. is this normal? Will I have to always get a vouch or will I be allowed to apply on my own. Do I have to pay to use a bank branch?
- Can you get prepaid phones here? I was reading there is T-Mobile in the UK, I have T-Mobile in the states can I move my account over to the UK? My boyfriend said they became EE? He has an account at EE and he has said he will add me to his account, is that with my T-Mobile US account?
- Does credit work in the same way as it does in the US? I had a credit card I bought all my every day purchases on it and paid it off at the end of the month by check, I was told my score would increase, is that the same here?
- Anything else I should know?

Sorry for all the questions, I know should have researched this, but I followed my heart. I have savings if it goes wrong, so don't worry on that front.

Any help received! 

eamon

https://www.internations.org/go/moving-to-the-uk

The above was top of the google list.

Savvy_Sue

Meeting the parents isn't necessarily prim and proper: it depends on what sort of people they are, and you'd have to ask your boyfriend for guidance on that. Plus it won't be happening any time soon ... 

I knew my husband's family from a young age, so it certainly wasn't formal when we met up with them once we'd started going out. And once we were engaged, I landed unexpectedly on their doorstep after a row with my mother, so no time to buy a gift. Only for a few days, mind you: he was staying there and I was supposed to be staying with mine. 

Two of my lads have significant friends: one had been to the house several times with a group of others before they were dating although I didn't remember meeting them. So I guess our first meeting was taking them out for a meal. I don't think I got a gift, I certainly wasn't expecting one. The other we met for the first time when we went out for a meal with everyone: again, no gift received or expected. 

When we see DH's family I may get flowers or a plant at the end of our visit, but I don't usually arrive with anything. Our presence has to be enough ... 

sazaccount

- Meeting the parents, back home I would take a gift to them and it wouldn't be formal. I've been told here that its very prim and proper. Can anyone give me the low down?
Can't help on this one, but maybe a bottle of wine (if they drink) or a bunch of flowers 

- Why do I have to get a sponsor/reference to get a bank account. My boyfriend had to vouch for me at his bank. is this normal? Will I have to always get a vouch or will I be allowed to apply on my own. Do I have to pay to use a bank branch?
Majority of the banking in the UK is free - unless you want to go for a paid package one. I can only assume it is because you don't have a credit history yet as soon as you have a few months it won't be an issue. 

- Can you get prepaid phones here? I was reading there is T-Mobile in the UK, I have T-Mobile in the states can I move my account over to the UK? My boyfriend said they became EE? He has an account at EE and he has said he will add me to his account, is that with my T-Mobile US account?
I would properly recommend going with someone like giffgaff for a sim can be brought at most supermarkets for a couple of pound and topped up either online or via a app just so you can get a bearing on how much data minutes etc these are also month to month so you can cancel at any time then you can look at longer contracts
Your American T-mobile account won't mean anything here, please do not use your phone on roaming as the cost is horrendous!  

- Does credit work in the same way as it does in the US? I had a credit card I bought all my every day purchases on it and paid it off at the end of the month by check, I was told my score would increase, is that the same here?
You can either ask the bank you have an account with or look at a sub prime lender for a starter credit card, normally with only a couple of hundred until you have "proved" that you can have a credit card. purchase day to day things then at/before the payment due date pay it off this can either be done with your bank card or though an app/website cheques (check) are not really used unless its for children's activities etc.
Be aware bank cards are slightly different than in the US - chip and pin, signatures are rarely used  and contactless is more wide spread than in the US.

- Anything else I should know?
Tipping is not really a thing here other than a couple of quid unless in a large group/your choice for outstanding service.
Tax is included in everything except for when it says exc VAT (which is rare)
and as a brit in north America please don't try and imitate the British accent, I can tell some people don't mean to its just strange 

Emmia

You won't have a credit file/ history in the UK so opening a bank account will be harder. 

In terms of the mobile, you can get pay as you go, that you top up - but I'd be surprised if you could keep your US account once you move to the UK - you'll need a new number as the dialling codes are different. 

You can use your US driving licence for a year, but you don't have the right of exchange (unlike  Canadian or Australian licence holders for example) so if you want to drive once the year is up you'll need to do the UK driving test - including theory & hazard perception parts.

Riley_G

sazaccount said:

- Meeting the parents, back home I would take a gift to them and it wouldn't be formal. I've been told here that its very prim and proper. Can anyone give me the low down?
Can't help on this one, but maybe a bottle of wine (if they drink) or a bunch of flowers 

- Why do I have to get a sponsor/reference to get a bank account. My boyfriend had to vouch for me at his bank. is this normal? Will I have to always get a vouch or will I be allowed to apply on my own. Do I have to pay to use a bank branch?
Majority of the banking in the UK is free - unless you want to go for a paid package one. I can only assume it is because you don't have a credit history yet as soon as you have a few months it won't be an issue. 

- Can you get prepaid phones here? I was reading there is T-Mobile in the UK, I have T-Mobile in the states can I move my account over to the UK? My boyfriend said they became EE? He has an account at EE and he has said he will add me to his account, is that with my T-Mobile US account?
I would properly recommend going with someone like giffgaff for a sim can be brought at most supermarkets for a couple of pound and topped up either online or via a app just so you can get a bearing on how much data minutes etc these are also month to month so you can cancel at any time then you can look at longer contracts
Your American T-mobile account won't mean anything here, please do not use your phone on roaming as the cost is horrendous!  

- Does credit work in the same way as it does in the US? I had a credit card I bought all my every day purchases on it and paid it off at the end of the month by check, I was told my score would increase, is that the same here?
You can either ask the bank you have an account with or look at a sub prime lender for a starter credit card, normally with only a couple of hundred until you have "proved" that you can have a credit card. purchase day to day things then at/before the payment due date pay it off this can either be done with your bank card or though an app/website cheques (check) are not really used unless its for children's activities etc.
Be aware bank cards are slightly different than in the US - chip and pin, signatures are rarely used  and contactless is more wide spread than in the US.

- Anything else I should know?
Tipping is not really a thing here other than a couple of quid unless in a large group/your choice for outstanding service.
Tax is included in everything except for when it says exc VAT (which is rare)
and as a brit in north America please don't try and imitate the British accent, I can tell some people don't mean to its just strange 

Thank you! to everyone too!

I wouldn't dare do the British accent my boyfriend warned me about the British accents and I fell foul to the tip when I offered a tip in a restaurant for two of us.

I was told by my boyfriend and a few others to avoid giff gaff, My phone doesn't work internationally so I would need a new one too.

What is a sub prime card? I have a bank account now with Barclays, they said I can have a picture on the card

Do I need to carry ID? I've been carrying my US passport everywhere.

Savvy_Sue

Riley_G said:

Do I need to carry ID? I've been carrying my US passport everywhere.

You don't need to carry ID, as in it's not a legal requirement to do so. And personally I wouldn't carry a passport around unless I was expecting to need it to prove my ID. But then, I can be a bit doozy with stuff ... 

I carry a couple of things which would help establish my ID if necessary, including a credit card sized membership card which has my photo on it: if I lost it, it wouldn't matter much. DH carries his driving licence, which again is credit card sized and fits in his wallet. 

Having said that, while you're in the position of trying to open bank accounts / apply for credit cards / get a phone, you might find the passport is useful, and easier to keep it with you all the time than have to think about it. I had to show mine when buying a phone recently (I was expecting to need it ...)

the other thing which is useful in those situations is proof of address. It could be worth your boyfriend putting you on the Council Tax bill, or another utility bill - but you will then be jointly liable if he defaults / you split up etc etc etc. 

Aranyani

Tipping in a restaurant is fine here and most people do, but about 10% is plenty and if the service is poor then you don't have to.  Waiting staff should be getting the minimum wage and tips are a top up, not something they rely on to live. 

sazaccount

Thank you! to everyone too!

I wouldn't dare do the British accent my boyfriend warned me about the British accents and I fell foul to the tip when I offered a tip in a restaurant for two of us.

I was told by my boyfriend and a few others to avoid giff gaff, My phone doesn't work internationally so I would need a new one too.

What is a sub prime card? I have a bank account now with Barclays, they said I can have a picture on the card

Do I need to carry ID? I've been carrying my US passport everywhere.

Tipping is ok its just not a condition as it is in the US where it is the majority of someone's wages where as in the UK servers are paid at least min and some "living" wage

My suggestion is to pick up a cheap phone from Amazon for around 100-150 and then going on a rolling sim, it just gives you the flexibility compared to being tired down to a 24 month contract. Have you tried a UK sim in your phone it may work, or contact T-mobile in the US and ask for the unlocking code they may send it to you they may not...

Beware that the banking here is different a checking account would be a current account. and the card is different for a credit card. a Sub prime one is one given to someone with no or poor credit history, that is great if Barclays will give you a credit card makes things easier. 

No you don't need your ID except if you are wanting to buy alcohol, if you have a US license I would possibly take this out with you, it maybe an idea when you have something with your address on like a bank statement/council tax/bill etc to get a provisional drivers license (you don't need to learn how to drive if you don't want too but it is just as good as your passport for "regular" ID situations)  

Riley_G

My boyfriend has made me get a National Insurance Number? I've not been given details of how to pay for the insurance. I guess I'll get that soon enough.

Is council tax where I had to fill a form in online and we got a letter from the council with both mine and my boyfriends name on it? As we already did that.

I spoke with EE on the phone earlier, he asked where I was from I told him I asked where he was from he said he was a gordie? They said I need to go in to a branch but I might not get a phone and a sim card. He advised me to get one added to my boyfriends account wait 6 months and move it to my own account? Its confusing.

I did drivers ed in high school, living in NYC I found I never needed to drive. Will look at changing it over. Never driven stick!

I need to register for a doctor. is a GP the same thing?

MovingForwards

My boyfriend has made me get a National Insurance Number? I've not been given details of how to pay for the insurance. I guess I'll get that soon enough.
-- if you are getting a job NI (national insurance) and tax is deducted before you get paid, subject to earning minimum amounts.
-- if you are starting a business, you have to deal with paying NI and tax.

Is council tax where I had to fill a form in online and we got a letter from the council with both mine and my boyfriends name on it? As we already did that.
-- yes

I spoke with EE on the phone earlier, he asked where I was from I told him I asked where he was from he said he was a gordie?
-- Newcastle

 They said I need to go in to a branch but I might not get a phone and a sim card. He advised me to get one added to my boyfriends account wait 6 months and move it to my own account? Its confusing.
-- just buy a cheap phone and SIM, start as you mean to go on and do not be dependent on anyone.

I did drivers ed in high school, living in NYC I found I never needed to drive. Will look at changing it over. Never driven stick!
-- you will learn when you look to change your licence, take driving lessons etc. 

I need to register for a doctor. is a GP the same thing?
-- yes