The second hurdle - Nichelette v the huge mortgage

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  • NicheletteNichelette Forumite
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    I hope everyone has had a nice Christmas, as much as the situation allows anyway. We were put into tier 4 which to be honest did upset me a bit, mainly because of the lack of notice and everything completely changing so quickly meaning we couldn't drop off gifts on the 24th and have instead been left with everything. I know the situation is bad now but we're 3 miles from a boundary so we couldn't even do our food shop in the usual place because they were in 2, though it's 4 as well now so I can shop in Aldi again lol. Most of my family spent Xmas in 2 so some of them were allowed to see each other. Don't get me wrong, we hardly go anywhere or see anyone now and we are being sensible, but I was really looking forward to a couple of hours with people on the 24th. I haven't seen my mum since August and I'm really missing her now. I know that she feels like she is missing out too as she hasn't seen me since I told her about the baby. Speaking of which, 26 weeks today and counting!

    This month has been a bit of a write off money wise. Unfortunately on the 22nd boy bunny woke up from a sleep and couldn't use his legs properly. It turns out he has an ear infection and finally after 6 days of nursing him (which is exhausting) he seems to be improving which is great as I've been so worried about him. The infection has made him unbalanced and he circles now, but is much more stable of late and choosing to eat of his own accord. From what I've seen the recovery will be quite long so we are back at the vets on Thursday when I expect to get more antibiotics, but I'm just pleased he is improving now to be honest. Obviously all the vet trips and drugs have come at a cost. December clearly isn't my financial month! In happier news, my car insurance renewal is about £100 less than last year so positives...

    I honestly have no idea how much we'll have left at the end of the pay month so I'm just going see on the 14th. Unfortunately the strong winds a couple of nights ago made part of the fence break apart again. This is a sore point for me and a cause of more expense. 

    Earlier in the year when we had the storms the fence to our left got absolutely battered by the neighbours tree. My husband actually got a video of it snapping as by chance he was filming a video to show his dad who lives elsewhere how strong the wind was. Unfortunately as the tree isn't ours we can't remove the source of the issue, so every time it's windy the fence gets further battered. It's about 12ft, really close to the fence, and every time it's windy it's like someone hitting it with a baseball bat repeatedly. During said storms we did our best to patch it up so it didn't come down completely, but honestly it was beating it so hard I could hardly manage to hold it whilst my husband tried to nail in more wood to stabilise it. I would be less annoyed at this if it weren't for the sheer audacity of our neighbour who later said to my husband one day about how 'our' fence had broken.

    From everything I can see, the fence is hers and not ours. The 'T' marker on the conveyancing plan, the way the 'front' faces her garden, and the way the final fence on the left is a different sort as that is part of the communal area and maintained by the monthly fee we pay. The houses aren't too old, and bar our fence to the right which was replaced with a better one when the old owners landscaped the garden, the others are all originals so we can see which direction they all originally faced. Every other panel is fine as they're not being hammered by a massive tree! To be honest, even it it were ours, having the front to expect us to fix it when her tree is breaking is pretty embarrassing and I'd be mortified if it were my tree. Really it needs a new panel, but there is absolutely no point when exactly the same would happen to any replacement. Anyway, I have decided we'll have to buy some sort of willow/reed panel the size of the existing one, attach it to the posts either size and grow ivy up it for privacy. Having looked that will be more expensive than another panel. If the tree weren't there and it was an act of god type situation I really wouldn't mind replacing it, but her behaviour has really annoyed me. She has this woe is me type thing about her and wants others to do/pay for everything for her which I find really irritating. It's like if she sees anyone out doing something she will try and rope people into doing 'x' for her as well. She likes to plead poverty as she's retired, but she also retired very young with no mortgage. She's probably 60's and physically able, we're not talking about a decrepit old lady. She probably sees us as rolling in it because we both work, but we're also up to our eyes in mortgage and about to be spending in the region of £1100 a month in childcare, plus looking after a baby. Still, it's the principle really. I need to stop thinking about it because it makes me so annoyed! 

    So anyway, next job, try find affordable 6x6ft panel and hope for no more wind... also pray the rest of the fence doesn't come down from the ricochet :neutral:


    Finally bought a home
    Starting mortgage £289,500 31.01.19 - Current outstanding £228,945.57
    MFW #86 - aiming for 5k in 2022
    Overpayments since 27.03.19: £39,513. 52
  • twinklietwinklie Forumite
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    Glad I managed to make you laugh. I still find it crazy that people have to sign up their kids to nursery when they aren't even here yet in order to secure a place! It blows my mind. We were sooo lucky. We didn't even look at nurseries for DS1 until about 3 months until I went back to work. Then we moved, so had to put him in a new one. Then we moved again and needed ANOTHER new one. Got him in all of them no bother and then DS2 went to the one that DS1 was in last. They are both at school now which makes it so much easier (assuming they are open). 

    I'd totally forgotten the council tax free months - that's really cheered me up. Thank you. :smile:
    Daily mortgage interest Oct 21 - £14.35 Reduction interest - £2.11
    % of house owned/% of mortgage paid off.
    Oct 21 - 21.87%/12.73%
    MFiT-T5 #13 £25,541/ £30,000 at last update July 21
    MFW 2021 #6 - £1,385.74/ £600 Oct 21
  • MFdreamerMFdreamer Forumite
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    Just stopping by to say don’t feel guilty about going back to work full time! My daughter went to nursery from age 10 months and it really benefited her. I felt insanely guilty about it at the time but at age 6, I can really tell which of her friends went to nursery and which didn’t! Some kids arrived at school totally unprepared for being away from their parents and being around other kids (sharing etc). I’m so glad in hindsight that my daughter wasn’t in that group. It’s heartbreaking watching 5 and 6 year olds be peeled away from their parents at the school gates 😢

    Also, work makes me happy and a happy mum equals a happy baby xx
    MFW
    1 Nov 2020 @ 
    £42,204 to go in 34 months! (£1,241 a month)
    1 September 2021 £17,500 to go in 24 months (£729 a month)
    MFW 2021 #3 - £24,148/ £17,500 🙌


  • South_coastSouth_coast Forumite
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    Ooh, I am so annoyed on your behalf about the fence 😡! I can totally sympathise with not wanting to get into a confrontation about it though. Could you bear to leave it as it is until she mentions it again and then explain that you were waiting for her to fix it, as your understanding is that it's her fence? No need to mention the tree aspect, just stick to your guns that it's not your fence x
    Mortgage start: £65,495 (March 2016)
    Cleared 🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️!!! In 5 years, 1 month and 29 days
    Total amount repaid: £72,307.03

    Finally earning interest instead of paying it!!!
  • savingholmessavingholmes Forumite
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    I'd be tempted to fix it and give her the bill. Also point out she had a duty of care as the landowner of the tree.
    Target 1) Clear CC debt - £1644 to go (but debt neutral) @ 0% Target 2) Lose weight & get fit 3) Write regularly 38113/70000 words Book 2 4) Develop passive income streams 5) Get to £3K EF 6) Declutter 7) MFW starting at £201999 Nov 21 with 264 262 payments to go. Now £200720. 8) Mortgage neutral progress (via private pension starting value c£3643 Nov 21) extra payments £187 including tax relief
  • NicheletteNichelette Forumite
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    I know it's mad @twinklie. Also feels a bit like tempting fate but needs must. Our visit was postponed because of staff shortage due to covid. It's re-arranged for the coming week but we'll see as the situation is obviously getting worse with that rather than better :(

    @MFdreamer thank you. I was one of those kids balling my eyes out when my mum first had to leave me and I do think that the socialisation will be positive as I was a cripplingly shy child. I'm going to put as much effort as I can beforehand trying to help his development and hoping for the best, but I do feel more comfortable about the nursery now because I think the environment (when we do get to visit properly) will be lovely, and it's OFSTED outstanding too. I'm really hopeful he will enjoy going there when the time comes. 

    Re fence, neighbour caught DH earlier when he was putting the rubbish out. She mentioned the fence and (thankfully) he did actually say yes we've seen, the tree keeps breaking it. She then proceeded to ask him to hammer the horizontal bits back, but I've already tried to push them and it's basically not possible because it has come loose at one side and they have dropped, plus I'm pretty sure if we were to it would snap what's there anyway. So yes, the audacity continues.. No point in invoicing her because we'd never see the money, plus we have to try and remain amicable because 1) plan is to move in 3-5 years and I expect she will still be there so I don't want to have to declare we've been in a dispute with her and 2) each house has an allocated parking space and a guest one next to it. Basically all 8 houses bar her are working couples who both have cars and we all get along fine as there is space for each house to use 2 spaces, but being the only single household she only has one car and I don't want her to get petty and report us to housing association who maintain the communal areas for using 2 spaces as the only other place to leave one car would then be the main road. Her 'second' space is occupied by the house on the other end as the lady there has one as do her two adult sons, and often there is a visiting girlfriend too, so she could easily say there is no guest space for her. It's quite annoying because myself and DH are both quite calm people who would rather help and don't particularly like confrontation but she's annoyed us both so much we both wish we could give her the conveyancing plan and tell her to stick it! 

    I went back to the vet with boy bun yesterday under the impression (based on his behaviour) that he was improving but the vet said the infection is still as bad. I felt a bit bad for her having to tell me tbh as I really did think it was improving. He has also lost some weight which is to be expected due to the reduced eating, so that was me home crying more hormonal tears as if he doesn't improve it looks like we'd have to consider PTS. He hasn't been really eating hay which should be the vast majority of their diet so yesterday I've moved from giving him whatever he wants (veg) to trying to encourage hay again as he was a brilliant hay eater before. Yesterday evening he picked up with the hay eating and has been eating more today. Not as much as usual, but I again feel like his behaviour, stability and body language is improving. I'm trying to be positive about his future. I wouldn't keep him going for my own means if he was really ill, but I feel like there is still a light in him so I'm willing to keep trying for now. We've got 10 days worth of antibiotics again and we'll reassess then unless he becomes too unwell in the interim. I know inner ear infections are very difficult to shift in rabbits and it can be a long process. Anyway, that was another vet bill lol. 

    I'm hoping to make it to the end of the month with the 1k I'm saving towards paying off the cc. I feel like I'll be lucky if we have anything extra left to overpay the mortgage but I'd already accept this month as a write off lol. In happy news car and house insurance have now been sorted and paid for so that is at least done. 

    Finally bought a home
    Starting mortgage £289,500 31.01.19 - Current outstanding £228,945.57
    MFW #86 - aiming for 5k in 2022
    Overpayments since 27.03.19: £39,513. 52
  • savingholmessavingholmes Forumite
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    Sorry you've had a tussle with the neighbour and that your bunny is unwell. You are doing well on the rest though. Happy New Year. You will succeed overall I'm sure. 
    Target 1) Clear CC debt - £1644 to go (but debt neutral) @ 0% Target 2) Lose weight & get fit 3) Write regularly 38113/70000 words Book 2 4) Develop passive income streams 5) Get to £3K EF 6) Declutter 7) MFW starting at £201999 Nov 21 with 264 262 payments to go. Now £200720. 8) Mortgage neutral progress (via private pension starting value c£3643 Nov 21) extra payments £187 including tax relief
  • NicheletteNichelette Forumite
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    Just a quick one...

    Happy new year @savingholmes !

    Have had a bit of a rollercoaster time with boy bun. He was booked in to be PTS on Friday because I was scared if he lost much more weight they wouldn't actually be able to do it. It was incredibly sad, but when we went to the vet he's (shockingly) put on 60g. Not a lot I know, but a gain nonetheless. He has since been eating like a trooper and I'm pretty sure as a result he's obviously gaining weight again. His body language also seems better and the vet agreed that the nystagmus (eye movements) had gone and whilst still circling he's more stable than before. He's now drinking of his own accord and enjoying normal bunny things like grooming his wife bun. He's such a little fighter <3.  

    We were given the choice of whether we'd like to try the antibiotics for longer and there's still no guarantee that he will get over the infection, but I'm doing my best for him as long as he's still eating and okay in himself. He's not out the woods yet and I'm still cautious, but fingers crossed...

    We're visiting the nursery tomorrow (3rd time lucky!) so we'll see how that goes. The last few weeks I feel like I've got huge. I feel like I'll be massive in 12 weeks, but at least I look pregnant now rather than just fat! I've made the realisation today that when he moves the closest feeling I can liken it to is having one of those shiatsu massagers inside me! I've still got some bits left to buy. Not the big stuff but I do really need to order a mattress for the cot so I should get on with that just in case...

    We've got about £1300 left at the moment so I'll do my usual sweep on the 14th before we're paid. I'll make a token overpayment I think but I'm just going to pay most off the CC. At least the bill horror month is nearly over. Bun didn't choose the best month to get ill but I love the little guy and he's worth every penny. 
    Finally bought a home
    Starting mortgage £289,500 31.01.19 - Current outstanding £228,945.57
    MFW #86 - aiming for 5k in 2022
    Overpayments since 27.03.19: £39,513. 52
  • savingholmessavingholmes Forumite
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    Getting CCs clear before baby is definitely a good call. Have you got much to go or was it a one-off blip because of the bunny?
    Target 1) Clear CC debt - £1644 to go (but debt neutral) @ 0% Target 2) Lose weight & get fit 3) Write regularly 38113/70000 words Book 2 4) Develop passive income streams 5) Get to £3K EF 6) Declutter 7) MFW starting at £201999 Nov 21 with 264 262 payments to go. Now £200720. 8) Mortgage neutral progress (via private pension starting value c£3643 Nov 21) extra payments £187 including tax relief
  • NicheletteNichelette Forumite
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    Getting CCs clear before baby is definitely a good call. Have you got much to go or was it a one-off blip because of the bunny?
    CC is a bit under 6.5k because it's from when we did the kitchen and some baby bits I've added as I've found good deals on them, but we have 4k in premium bonds to pay it off (thought as it's 0% until July we might as well leave it there on the off chance!). We had saved to pay it off before but the money ended up coming off the mortgage so we got into the next LTV bracket in time for remortgage, we'll be fine getting it paid off soon though.

    I've been tested for gestational diabetes yesterday. I think I will have it to be honest so I'm expecting a call on Tuesday or Wednesday as I think they're quite quick with it. I'm pretty annoyed with myself as I normally eat fairly healthily, don't drink fizzy drinks etc, but I think with the amount of misery around covid (having Xmas taken away made me quite sad) I ploughed myself into cake a bit much because it was the only joy I had left. Anyway, too late to change it now... Am 30 weeks on Tuesday. I think with GD it's common for them to induce at 38 weeks so I might only have 8 weeks to go. My bump is measuring normally for my size but I feel massive and doing most things feels like an effort now :|. I'm barely going out again because of covid which won't be helping on the GD front. I can't wait until I can get jogging again to be honest. 

    Our spare room which will be for baby looks like a bomb has hit it because I can't sort anything. I have an extra desk in there (so 2) because it needs to go back to my dad's but we can't go in his house, there's bags of things for charity that I can't leave them, and I just don't feel like I can clear anything because I'm just shunting about things that I need to get rid of around. The pram and a car seat are in there too. I would put it in a car boot but with it being cold I don't want it getting grotty and smelly. Baby will be in with us for the first 6 months so in a way it doesn't matter, but seeing so much clutter isn't good for my brain. 

    I need to go back to the vets with bun soon. He is eating and drinking well but still circling. I think he still has quality of life and see him doing happy bunny things, but I'm not sure that the circling will ever go. I've been using puppy pads and keeping him in a dog crate where other bunny can access him but it takes a lot of space and I'm starting to struggle moving past it and my work chair, plus there is just mess everywhere and I really want to not have hay all over the place. I've bought a potting tray as the front is low and they're supposed to make good litter trays for disabled buns but I'm not sure he gets it. My other option is to put the crate under the stairs where they usually live if it comes to it. The bending is crippling me. Husband would give him his medication but I think more would end up outside of his mouth so I keep doing it myself. I think we're probably looking at palliative care to be honest. It's hard to know what is for the best.

    Money wise I will make a token payment towards the mortgage, but I really want to bring focus to getting it down again. I feel like with the baby, covid misery and ill bun I've just been drifting along with no focus which isn't like me really. Meh. 
    Finally bought a home
    Starting mortgage £289,500 31.01.19 - Current outstanding £228,945.57
    MFW #86 - aiming for 5k in 2022
    Overpayments since 27.03.19: £39,513. 52
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