First Steps to Solvency

RelievedSheff

@Alt80 no need to feel guilty for having some down time and relaxing at the weekend. It will do you the world of good.

Back to it now it's Monday  

Have a great day.

getmore4less

Quick morning update went to bed early around your 21:15 post.
Smashing the no alcohol,  but that was not your thing most of the time seemed to be little or binge  it was the other stuff that's the real success.

WIFE: work in progress, she is months behind you bit some good progress on there,  the spending is just manifestation of a more deep rooted underlying problem that is what is important to fix,  the money is secondary and will work its self out.
some good talking there to move in the right direction,  it need to come from inside and she will need the support.

WEEKEND : this is what weekends are for recharge the batteries have fun times with family rugby next weekend make the planning easier,  also key to helping the wife as you is what she needs not IG which happens if you bury yourself in work keep up the planned by Wed  it is working.

CAR  I really think one cycle through a work lease is what's needed here, I would say 3+ but if that is going to hurt too much 2,  Any second hand car is going to just eat into cash in an unpredictable way with maintenance  I think fixing costs is very important that is what you get with a company funded car.

will do the holidays and cash flow later got a call now about money.

curtains174

@alt80 my OH has not long taken delivery of a Tesla, he loves it. It’s through work so very tax efficient, no petrol costs, 4 door and fun to drive. Worth considering?

getmore4less

People  I need to talk start 8:30.

HOLIDAYS : I like mine(we try to do at least 6 a year) but look for value we know people that do the luxury Dubai, we even went to check out their hotel when we were there last and it is very nice but not for us at that price even with the very nice view of Palm and Atlantis from the roof top bar.
.
As you have said your best holidays are elsewhere that is what they need to be moving forward.
 I know you think holiday time is wasted but even you can change.

CASHFLOW,  I realised I should have done the next step on those graphs of the min payments which would be more in line with reality as some of the money is going on cards not due till later so the surplus is a bit smaller because of that and the dips below the line will be a different 

The thing is the surplus over mins  can be anywhere,  savings or just reducing the balance of the next card in line.
pretty much the same for all the future spends that are getting allocated from the monthly budget, in the cashflow analysis it appears at the time it get spent  until then there is one small(getting bigger) surplus pot of cash to fund these future spends  as needed the trick is to get the cashflow line  above zero all the time and you can track this projection once things get better, 

Say you have £3k in the plan for a holiday in 4 months time  but like one that will cost £5k  stick it does the line go below zero on the cash flow, then it may have to wait or might need to borrow a bit, the line will show for how long if you can't find savings elsewhere or move some other spend.

This one of the reasons I like MSmoney you stick in your predicted income and spends when they are likely to happen and it does all this for you.

If the min payments on the cards are a simple % of balance MSM can do that as well,  pretty easy to build into yoiur spreadsheet  but since this is only a few cards and not a long time I would just update manually your cashflow 

alt80

Happy Monday. Good start to the day after an ok nights sleep even if I did have the weird dreams haha probably got about 6.5 hours so not bad for me.

Enjoyed a nice breakfast with family and son looking forward to doing his photojournal tonight wife told me that’s all my responsibility haha so need to print off. Got her phone for the day in my office FML nice to switch that thing on silent and not constantly hear her notifications can tell you that. 

@getmore4less haha few early to bed people on here think I possibly need to start doing that 9pm bit too early though lol. Noticed I do work better in the morning, more switched on if I make the effort. 

Thanks mate re alcohol, generally you’re right. Used to drink most days but generally just a glass off wine with the wife over dinner and a Scotch before bed but could take it or leave it, not really been drinking in the weekdays for quite a while. Other stuff def more an issue for me by a long way. Going into week 5 soon ha long time since I’ve been able to say that and pleased I’ve got this far. 

Yeah agreed re wife hope she works it out but who knows had this many times before where she’ll decide she wants to give it up but lasts no time. Shouldn’t complain I’ve been just as bad with other stuff in the past !!!!!! made for each other we are ha. Spend the time together at the weekends and she’s too busy to touch the IG. 

Weekend planning just got a bit easier with rugby though funny you should mention it wife doing food order came in office thinking about rugby snacks haha wonder if I’ve actually got a good one when she’s like that lol.

Also funny you should mention car probably only thing you’re ever going to have in common with my Mrs but she also said we could have car through work and just go for a drive in the Range. Yeah it’s def no sports car but is a nice place to be. True re second hand cars 100% mate no personal experience but there’s maintenance / repair bills then there’s V12 Aston maintenance and repair bills from what I know haha. 

Edited - 

Ha don’t let me stop you getting on with your day mate. 

Holidays - erm 6 a year really wouldn’t want that lol. Wife would be very happy go away every school break if she could she loves the hols. 

Having done Dubai type hols and similar 100% agree there mate. Actually have thought the same re just not being worth it for the price - biggest win for me realising thinking like that about the value doesn’t make me a failure.

Cash flow - thanks mate. I remember you recommending MS Money before - I moved everything to 365 a few years back did try to find it as does sound like it would be of help. Still don’t think I have it. The spreadsheets are work in progress, not really until last week have I really started working through them and getting it working more effectively so will see how that goes. Been there with the business with what you’re talking about. 

Re positive balances wife thinks we should keep income level the same when the debt turns to savings (probably just wants to go buying £500 tops again haha), I reckon I should just keep it retained and invest better out of our hands personally both tax and we are idiots lol but we’ll see, got a while for that.

@curtains174 briefly considered a Tesla and that’s where things are likely to go with staff cars. Fits wife’s requirements for a large screen FML but I think they’re !!!!!! and the interiors look really cheap too. Know they’re fast though haha. Want to avoid 4 door if possible but am open to it potentially. 

ryanm8655

alt80 said:

Happy Monday. Good start to the day after an ok nights sleep even if I did have the weird dreams haha probably got about 6.5 hours so not bad for me.

Enjoyed a nice breakfast with family and son looking forward to doing his photojournal tonight wife told me that’s all my responsibility haha so need to print off. Got her phone for the day in my office FML nice to switch that thing on silent and not constantly hear her notifications can tell you that. 

@getmore4less haha few early to bed people on here think I possibly need to start doing that 9pm bit too early though lol. Noticed I do work better in the morning, more switched on if I make the effort. 

Thanks mate re alcohol, generally you’re right. Used to drink most days but generally just a glass off wine with the wife over dinner and a Scotch before bed but could take it or leave it, not really been drinking in the weekdays for quite a while. Other stuff def more an issue for me by a long way. Going into week 5 soon ha long time since I’ve been able to say that and pleased I’ve got this far. 

Yeah agreed re wife hope she works it out but who knows had this many times before where she’ll decide she wants to give it up but lasts no time. Shouldn’t complain I’ve been just as bad with other stuff in the past !!!!!! made for each other we are ha. Spend the time together at the weekends and she’s too busy to touch the IG. 

Weekend planning just got a bit easier with rugby though funny you should mention it wife doing food order came in office thinking about rugby snacks haha wonder if I’ve actually got a good one when she’s like that lol.

Also funny you should mention car probably only thing you’re ever going to have in common with my Mrs but she also said we could have car through work and just go for a drive in the Range. Yeah it’s def no sports car but is a nice place to be. True re second hand cars 100% mate no personal experience but there’s maintenance / repair bills then there’s V12 Aston maintenance and repair bills from what I know haha. 

Edited - 

Ha don’t let me stop you getting on with your day mate. 

Holidays - erm 6 a year really wouldn’t want that lol. Wife would be very happy go away every school break if she could she loves the hols. 

Having done Dubai type hols and similar 100% agree there mate. Actually have thought the same re just not being worth it for the price - biggest win for me realising thinking like that about the value doesn’t make me a failure.

Cash flow - thanks mate. I remember you recommending MS Money before - I moved everything to 365 a few years back did try to find it as does sound like it would be of help. Still don’t think I have it. The spreadsheets are work in progress, not really until last week have I really started working through them and getting it working more effectively so will see how that goes. Been there with the business with what you’re talking about. 

Re positive balances wife thinks we should keep income level the same when the debt turns to savings (probably just wants to go buying £500 tops again haha), I reckon I should just keep it retained and invest better out of our hands personally both tax and we are idiots lol but we’ll see, got a while for that.

@curtains174 briefly considered a Tesla and that’s where things are likely to go with staff cars. Fits wife’s requirements for a large screen FML but I think they’re !!!!!! and the interiors look really cheap too. Know they’re fast though haha. Want to avoid 4 door if possible but am open to it potentially. 

Teslas are nice inside imo! All the Ubers in Dubai are Teslas. It’s funny because I always think Range Rover interiors look cheap I mean, for how expensive they are...so I guess it’s subjective ha. I’d rather a V8 or something if I was loaded but would have no qualms about a Tesla!

Sounds like a very productive weekend.

Agree re: Dubai being a rip off. I’m not a fan of the place at all. Have mates there and a mate who I often used to tag along with on work trips and stay in his suite for free. Imo it’s mocking people with the prices Went to Nusr-Et steakhouse at the four seasons hotel, the salt-bae place. We had a steak, one glass of wine each and a cocktail and it came to about £500...normally we’d have drank a lot more but it was just such a rip off...looked up the wines and the £20 glass of wine we had was like a £7 bottle of wine retail The steak was good but it wasn’t the best I’d ever had or anything...also the waiter did the whole salt down the arm thing and poured salt in my cocktail That place epitomises Dubai for me, it’s all pretense with no substance...exactly like Instagram ha. The queue of cars for that hotel was mental though...

getmore4less

<RANT>
That's 3 hours of my life I won't be getting back,  I need a beer  LOL.

on hold for much of it and talked to the wrong department twice.

Been getting letters about needing personal details  for a policy  and I thought it was for one they keep sending me other letters and regular updates, WRONG

Finally worked out it is a pension policy going back to 1993,  glad I do not throw any paper work out found something about it buried  my 1990 work folders, a  Social security(probably now DWP) letter and last update from the pension company 1997, that's when we moved so must have got lost then,  why they can't just get the details off the other policy that is correct I don't know, 

Anyway can't fix it over the phone  got to write to them again as the last letter I wrote was  for the wrong policy.
 I suspect is was contracting out of SERPS so there won't be much there can't even remember a thing about it.  
</RANT>

My sleep is way off, it is not just you, partly the sleepy juice starts a bit early if weather is rubbish and we don't go for a walk late afternoon I need a strick no beer before 7pm except on a rugby day

The wife situation is a bit of a catch22, you both fell into the trap of trying to fill time, but by it not being together you drifted into destructive behaviours which drove you further apart.

You were also both into image and believed spending was the way to achieve that but expressed it in different ways but again both indulging in behaviour which validated each others actions.

If you can both look for real value in what you do it does not matter what it costs if that is what you want to prioritize as long as it is within your means.

Be it a £1m house that will impress people(not) or the £500 top that gets worn once for a photo op both not much difference in the why, but both not good value if you don't need them.

Sort that out and things will fall into place.
I think you have made massive progress with this(especially on the house) and with your greater understanding you an help the wife get it as well.

doing stuff together really seems to work for both of you so keep it up,  think about how you are going to deal with the PIL when things open up,  you don't want to be getting into the habit of sending her off to them and you getting back into a mess,

On the cars I am not saying don't get a sports car just saying not yet  one lease cycle through work and review one less lump of metal on the drive to worry about for a couple of years won't hurt.

Agree the Tesla build can be a bit shoddy if you listen to some of the reviews they can't even get the paint right.

If it were me I would go functional for the car through work which means 4 door for dog and kid  and keep that RR interior pristine you are going to be living with that one for quite a few years
Then later(2y+) look for the 2 door fun car.

You have £3kpm going into cars and debt, the other £5k is roughly £2k house, £1k school, £2k rest 
Can't see all £3k ending up retained  there will need to be longer term car funds and open up the life stuff a bit.

Definitely no pay rises for a while, there is probably still some room to make the cost to company a bit lower utilising the wife allowances a bit more.


Not sure if it worth the effort to go to MSMoney, if you have used it before the learning curve won't be so long and you have the data so should not take long to load up a budget and see what the numbers look like.
just fiddling with your sheets might be OK as you can customise to what you want.
if you do want to give it a gothey released a final version for the UK "Money2005-UK-QFE2"
(US got sunset edition )

I installed on a fresh copy of W10 and MSM last year and it has been running fine for me.
This one seems to get linked to by people(its where I got mine at my own risk)
http://moneymvps.org/downloads/files/2005/Money2005-UK-QFE2.exe

Onebrokelady

Is it possible to block IG so it can't be accessed on your internet, like a parental control type thing 😀 seriously you need to get her to watch The Social Dilemma. The lengths these tech companies go to to get people to use their SM accounts are unbelievable 

enthusiasticsaver

Whether or not you keep income retained or have it to spend on fun car, holidays, new house or lifestyle the key is value.  I am bemused by the fact you  have a £100k RR which is hardly being used as you are trying to get value out of a car which is going.  If you aren't going to drive it what is the point of spending out all that money on it? Can't you use that as a fun car for a drive as your wife suggests at weekends and just get an affordable second car through the business.  When the debt and balloon for the RR are sorted then you could look at the AM.  Any earlier than that you jeopardise your finances again.

I think in most peoples eyes £500 for a top is a waste of money unless you are so rich you won't miss it.  Even then I would not spend it but will splash out up to £1500k  for a TV or a new laptop  as that is used all the time and will usually last us around 5 or 6 years until the tech updates again.  A top, unless you only have a couple will only be worn every now and again.  I would rather have 4 or 5 more reasonably priced ones so I have a choice of what to wear rather than wear the same thing over and over again which is what I would have to do if I had paid that much for it.  You could look at it as pay per usage.  So £100k for a car which is used daily is still a lot but I can see it is relatively good value if a prestige/luxury car.  £100k for a luxury car which sits on the driveway because you don't want to put mileage on it or in case it gets dirty or scratched seems a waste. 

Normally we will do around 6 holidays a year ranging from long haul holidays to US, Canada, Australia and Bali or a cruise to a week in Europe to a few weeks further down in Cornwall or up in Devon/Somerset or up in the Lakes and usually at least two a year to London to visit family and do a show/concert or whatever and a Centre Parcs family holiday. Never done Dubai though.  Missed all that over the last year. 

kayannie

Considering the amount that she spends on clothes, beauty etc, your wife must be very insecure regarding her looks if she is constantly comparing herself to others. I dread to think how much she will want to spend on these things when she gets older and the grey hairs and wrinkles appear!