Working for family - A terrible decision!

Walshie

Hi guys,
About a year ago I started working for my uncle's company. At the time I was in terrible employment where I hadn't been getting paid for long stints with other massive issues. I had two other job offers on the table of around £18 per hour and I was/am confident my skill set allows me to work at most companies within my industry. 
When I first started, I was on £17 per hour self-employed as a temporary measure whilst all the paperwork was sorted out. This took nearly 6 months to sort out and now I have gone employed my wage has dropped to £14. This is frustration #1 as my salary no longer covers my bills. I am having to do Saturday work elsewhere to put food on the table. When this subject was broached he just said no because I'm his pension pot. Since I have started he is hardly working anymore and is passing more and more things onto me. Even the contractors I work with have noticed!

Frustration 2: I was loaned by my mum some money to cover my bills & expenses when I was going through hell at the last company. During Covid-19 I had two weeks off as we could not get any stock. When we returned he declared in front of everyone that (only me) I had to pay it back by working every Saturday for three months. I said back something similar to "that's not fair your putting me in debt" to which in front of everyone he said "don't worry about that just add it to the rest of the pile you owe everybody" whilst walking off declaring how he "bets I didn't like that one hahaha" (this is just one of many incidents of him talking out of turn in front of other people)

Frustration 3: He always talks about how little I earn in front of everybody. It's as if my salary has become a bit of a running joke for him. Nobody else finds it funny. At all.

Frustration 4: The other weekend I was on a family day out with my wife and kids. I put my phone on aeroplane mode so no one can call me (weekend calls are very common, very long & very annoying). When I turned my phone back on I had 20 missed calls and many abusive swearing messages over messenger about me not answering/ignoring calls. 

I guess I want you guys from an outside perspective to tell me if you think I am being oversensitive. I feel like things are getting out of hand and I'm being blatantly disrespected constantly. There is no room to progress either. My other problem is that He will likely never speak to me again if I leave. He always goes on about having loyal employees! 

Hopefully, someone can advise me on whether I'm being a snowflake/leave immediately!!

[Deleted User]

It's normally a bit of both 

But I don't understand why working Saturdays to pay off a debt is "putting you in debt'. A working day isn't a debt. It's just a working day.

But ultimately, if you don't like working there, you need to move. 

DCFC79

OP Id leave, its doing you no good. 
The fact you have to work a Saturday elsewhere should tell you to leave.

pinkshoes

I would be applying for other jobs then hand your notice in.

Your uncle clearly does not respect you and by staying you are doing yourself no favours.

TELLIT01

Find another job and then hand your notice in.  As pinkshoes says, there is no respect from your uncle so you have no reason to have any loyalty to him.  He is taking the proverbial.

comeandgo

This is not fair on you, nor on your wife and family who won't see you as you are having to work extra.  I would suggest you look for another job.  Your uncle is treating you abominably, though self employed wages are always more than employees.

gwynlas

Why would you worry abot his never speaking to you again? From the outside it looks as though you are being exploited.
It should not have taken six months to sort out paperwork and was there any explanation as to why your hourly rate was reduced? I know times are not easy but you should be looking for another job that pays you what you are worth.
Your uncle soundds like a buly.

gettingtheresometime

Would you accept that sort of treatment off any other employer?
If the answer is no then you have the answer to your question about being oversensitive.
As others have said, get a job, any job if only to get out of there.
The only thing I would say is I wouldn't put my phone on aeroplane mode to avoid receiving calls...someone else may need to get hold of you in an emergency.....what about blocking his number when you don't want to receive work calls?

Brynsam

Did you ever follow this good advice, given nearly two years ago in response to your previous moans about your workplace:

More seriously, have you ever thought about doing an assertiveness course? At the moment you are in the position of the proverbial doormat and the only thing which will change that is if YOU change. Your boss has no interest at all in changing his behaviour, since you are demonstrably putting up with it - which reinforces and reconfirms his belief that he can stay with the status quo.

gettingtheresometime

Deleted_User said:

It's normally a bit of both 

But I don't understand why working Saturdays to pay off a debt is "putting you in debt'. A working day isn't a debt. It's just a working day.

But ultimately, if you don't like working there, you need to move. 

I assume that if the OP works for his uncle on a Saturday they can't work at their 2nd job 

Marcon

You sound like a total wimp. Clearly being a doormat is your default setting, so things will continue as they are until you do something about changing your own behaviour.