One income family of four - can we get ahead even after pay cuts?

Baileys_Babe

We are way behind in our Christmas present shopping, mainly as we have no idea what to get people, including our own children, dd has a couple of bits ds doesn't have anything yet - bad parents.

Bluegreen143

It is difficult isn’t it @joedenise. We will be lucky enough to see both sets of the kids’ grandparents - MIL is in our extended household anyway and we are going to make use of the relaxation over Christmas to stay with my parents overnight on Boxing Day. Our siblings, friends etc we will try to have a garden visit or walk with at some point and exchange gifts that way but it doesn’t feel very Christmassy not having proper get togethers to look forward to, it’s such a shame. I think you’re probably being sensible avoiding meeting up as I expect the virus figures will go very high in January. I imagine lots of people won’t stick to the 3 household bubble etc.

@Baileys_Babe I found it tricky this year too. There are some people I often get experiences for rather than “stuff” eg with my parents and sister we often buy a day out type thing for all of us to do together. But I didn’t want to get anything like that this year as it’s hard to predict when things will reopen or if recipients will be comfortable with the activity.

Bluegreen143

@joedenise you can hem the legs & arms instead (if you make them a bit longer) but I needed the stretchier fabric for the collars anyway. It does look nice in the photos with the arm/leg cuffs in and Monkey tends to like PJs like this where they are stretchy and fitted. This photo is from the front of the pattern so it’s the same ones I’m making, but with different fabric.

joedenise

They look lovely @Bluegreen143.  I'm sure the children will love them; hopefully you won't find it too difficult to stitch the cuffs on to the sleeves and legs.  Hope you're going to post a photo of them when you have made them - would be lovely to see them.

Baileys_Babe

We usually take my parents to the pantomime as part of their Christmas present which we sadly won't be doing this year.

Spendless

Hi, I read your thread back in the summer, didn't catch up with it and have just read the last few pages. You've very much my life just at a younger age. I have a son, 3 years older than my daughter, both born in the same month. March for us which always made that time of year expensive, due to mother's day too and not helped by my sister's twins also being born then. Mine are (almost) grown up now, son is at Uni, daughter almost 18 at college. I've spent huge chunks of the kids childhood not working, recessions, financial crashes, re-structures, companies losing contracts, closing down and the most recent pandemic when I found myself out of a job inside a week all contributed, but it does get easier to search for something as they get older. My hisband has been the breadwinner throughout, and not always 'getting' why I stress about money. Looking forward to reading the rest of your journey. 

Bluegreen143

@Spendless thanks for stopping by and commenting. Wow there really are a lot of similarities there! Similar poor planning on the joint birthdays... funnily enough my sister and I have our birthdays only two days apart, and within the same week as my mum, so it’s quite nice in a way having the two kids similar as it reminds me of what a festive occasion we always made of “birthday week” growing up. I was glad when Monkey’s third birthday had safely passed and Bambi was still inside though as I had a persistent fear she would be born on the same day! Can’t imagine my two at 21 and 18 but I’m know the time will fly in before I know it.

I think you need a saver and a spender in a marriage don’t you? Well it’s not going to work out well if you are both spenders, but one of you being a bit more laid back helps balance it out a bit. If Red let me I’d probably embark on all kind of mad saving challenges and we’d never get any new stuff. If I complain about needing something (eg say my headphones break) Red usually sneakily orders a replacement for me as he knows I will never actually get them if left to my own devices and will just moan about it forever instead 😆

Spendless

Yes for many years I've thought about the 3 year gap in the same month with regard to their 18th and 21st birthdays, because the only other time you get both with a 'specia'l birthday at once with that spacing is their 13th and 16th ones. Not once though did I envisage a worldwide pandemic that will probably still have everything closed by then! 
 I was also glad when my youngest was born at the end of the month with eldest at the beginning because at least it's always been 2 different pay days. 

 Love the look of the pyjamas you've been doing. Are these for Christmas Eve? I started a Xmas Eve box for mine around 10 years ago, mostly to keep them out of my hair whilst I tried to get things done. Son outgrew it after first year, daughter never has, so this year is her final one as I've pointed out to her next Chrsitmas she will be 18 and people who are legally able to go to the pub on Christmas Eve don't need entertaining instead with a Christmas eve hamper hahahaha. 

Bluegreen143

@Spendless yes, for Christmas Eve. I don’t do a whole box (yet 😅) but like to give them jammies. Means we can snuggle up to read bedtime stories in new jammies and also they look nice for the “Christmas morning” present opening bit and I can try to get a nice joint photo then! My mum always let us open something small on Christmas Eve too.

An 18th and 21st birthday same month as Christmas in Dec 2036 - I’d  best start saving now 😂

Hope your kids are doing well in this crazy pandemic situation. I always think it must be very hard on families with teens and young people. Little ones like mine just like playing at home anyway.

Bluegreen143

Shopping day today. I’ve gone back to weekly rather than fortnightly for the next few weeks as it feels too hard to plan for a fortnight over the festive period. Also went to Lidl rather than getting a Tesco delivery and got SO much more for my money, I think I’ll go back to shopping in Lidl and just save Tesco deliveries for if I need a lot of heavy things.

Spent £49.99 - £47.82 on food and £2.17 on hayfever meds for Red (he’s allergic to the cat as well as having hayfever so takes them year round) and sponge scouters.

Really pleased as I’m hoping to keep under £45 a week on food (as well as the £17 veg box). I was hoping to pay for the milk and fruit I bought with the card I got from the Scottish govt when I applied for benefits - like milk tokens but it’s on a prepaid card now - I’ve forgotten all about it until now so think there is £30-40 on there. But I’d forgotten to take a note of the PIN and the contactless wouldn’t work. So I’d have kept in budget if it wasn’t for that as I’m not going to count money spent from that card since I can’t put it towards anything but fruit&veg/milk.

For my £47.82 I got:

2x too good to waste boxes (I would never normally take two but there were loads of them all piled up and they were still there once I’d finished the rest of my shopping so I nabbed a second one, between them got loads of peppers, onions, bananas, an aubergine, satsumas, a few apples, tomatoes, a pear, lettuce, a few broken carrots) £3

Whole milk 4pt x3 £3.27
Grapes £1.24
Strawberries £1.85
Cucumber 43p
Cola x6 £2.34 (Red’s)
Fresh coriander 35p
Tinned butter beans 30p
Dried oregano 35p
Carrots 41p
Potatoes 99p
Salted butter x3 £4.47
Mayonnaise 59p
Pickled onions 35p
Tinned tuna x4 £2.45
Mushrooms 69p
Oatcakes 55p
Instant coffee £1.69
Greek yoghurt 1kg 89p
Honey 85p
Icing sugar 69p
Cheddar £1.79
Cheerios type cereal 85p
Frozen sweetcorn 85p
Lorne sausage 99p
Tinned tomatoes x8 £2.24
Baked beans 22p
Sugar 1kg 65p
Weetabix type cereal £1.42
Tinned kidney beans 30p
Gammon joint 1kg £3.53
Beef mince 1kg £3.29
Coconut milk 55p
Penne pasta 29p
Mixed spice 49p
Crisps 30pk £2.59 (Red’s - will do him next week too)

Mealplan:

Tonight - HM fish & chips (with veg), Red is cooking 

Friday - Red is paying for a takeaway as we didn’t have one on payday (though we did for Monkey’s birthday last week). He wants a KFC so won’t be pricey though I would personally just make something at home 😆 also not good for my healthy eating either!

Saturday - spag bol 

Sunday - either a cottage pie or same with pastry, which Monkey may prefer tbh, veg

Monday - soup & pudding - Bambi’s birthday! Soup is her favourite food anyway and pudding can be birthday cake which I’ll bake with her that day.

Tuesday - veggie Thai curry 

Wednesday - hummus & falafel wraps 

Shouldn’t need a top up shop this week but I may try and get to a Morrison’s as my sister told me you can get sides of salmon really cheap. She cut hers up for the freezer and I want to do the same. We don’t eat enough fish, partly as Red isn’t super keen and partly cos I wince at the price.