Power of attorney conflict of interest

pphillips

If he is physically capable of drawing out the cash out then he doesn't need you to go and get it for him.

If he isn't physically capable then check over the guidance to see if you are under a duty to act in these circumstances.

If you're ever unsure then you can always ask the Office of the Public Guardian how to proceed.

Robisere

I don't have any real advice for you Justi, but I consider the fact that you are worrying about taking the role of LPA, is evidence that you care about your dad enough to treat him properly and you are therfore, the right person to take it on.

Boojewels, I admire the way that you and your sister have worked together to provide a good life for your father.

Justi and Boojewels, I admire you both and I hope that my ds and dd have the same attitude towards my wife and myself when our time comes to need help. Although I am confident that they will be fine with us, as we have talked it over with them.

BooJewels

Robisere wrote: »

Boojewels, I admire the way that you and your sister have worked together to provide a good life for your father.

Thank you. We're very lucky in that the two of us are Attorneys, executors and beneficiaries, so there won't be any troublesome conflicts as the two of us pretty much agree on everything and have similar outlooks and agree that doing the best for Dad is always our guiding principle. He unfortunately no longer cares, which in some ways is a blessing as he's just relinquished all interest in his affairs, so we just do the best we can as we go along. But it's frustrating too, as he won't take part in any decision making - and I think we'd be happier if he occasionally expressed some preferences.

Justi and Boojewels, I admire you both and I hope that my ds and dd have the same attitude towards my wife and myself when our time comes to need help. Although I am confident that they will be fine with us, as we have talked it over with them.

That's the biggie - if you've already gone over it with them, then they've already had some guidance from you and will keep those wishes in mind as they perhaps need to manage your affairs. With the benefit of hindsight, we wish we'd had more discussion about things as events took a rapid turn we couldn't have predicted and we then realised how little we really knew - the discussions we'd had weren't really enough. We've spent stupid amounts of time looking for passports and driving licences and the like.

The upside to that was that we've now had those conversations we needed to with the other 2 family members we have LPAs for and in both cases, they're keeping a note book for us of things they'd like doing, wishes they'd like fulfilled and modest little things they'd like doing perhaps beyond the remit of their wills - such as someone who liked a particular ornament or picture to be gifted it. Plus, I know where all their important stuff is filed.

So to the OP and anyone else with LPAs, I'd strongly suggest those are helpful, albeit a bit sensitive and difficult, conversations that are truly worth having. If you're trusted enough to be an Attorney, then you should be trustworthy enough with the information.

Justi

Thank you Robisere. I only want to do the best for my dad, as I am sure your children will for you. It sounds like you have a great family and the fact you have already talked it over with them sounds like they are well placed to make the best possible decisions if/when that is ever needed.

Justi

Thank you for all your advice BooJewels. Hearing about your experience has been incredibly useful. I think I'm convinced that the LPA is pretty much essential for my dad and while I am a little concerned about the responsibility it does sound manageable - and probably much better than not having an LPA in place.
Thanks again for taking the trouble to write so much about it - very helpful!

BooJewels

Justi wrote: »

Thank you for all your advice BooJewels. Hearing about your experience had been incredibly useful. I think I'm convinced that the LPA is pretty much essential for my dad and while I am a little concerned about the responsibility it does sound manageable - and probably much better than not having an LPA in place.
Thanks again for taking the trouble to write so much about it - very helpful!

You're welcome and you're right - it is quite a scary responsibility and it does require the investment of some time - but these are our parents - they brought us into the world and brought us up - so it's right that we do this for them when the time comes. You hopefully might not actually need to do much - but the alternative of not having one in place could present a significant problem. I'd much rather spend the time sorting things out that I can, rather than the stress and frustration of being powerless.

So I'm a bit evangelical these days about persuading others to take them out, where appropriate.

Justi

BooJewels wrote: »

So I'm a bit evangelical these days about persuading others to take them out, where appropriate.

You definitely persuaded me - thank you!

elsien

getmore4less wrote: »

Read the mental health act code of conduct which applies to LPA.

Mental CapacityAct, not MHA.
Code of practice available to download free online.
Further guidance on OFfice of Public Guardian.

elsien

pphillips wrote: »

If he is physically capable of drawing out the cash out then he doesn't need you to go and get it for him.

If he isn't physically capable then check over the guidance to see if you are under a duty to act in these circumstances.

If you're ever unsure then you can always ask the Office of the Public Guardian how to proceed.

Physical ability should be irrelevant. If he has capacity but can't physically get to a bank, by refusing you are effectively overriding his decision. Picture yourself bedbound and your fully capacitous decision being overridden by those acting as your arms and legs. They may be doing it for the best of motives but they are still taking away your autonomy.

That's not a power of attorney decision, that's a relationship one and a conversation to have with your father before any LPA is put in place.
As in - I know you want me that do this, I know you know what you're doing, but my limits in this are xyz and these are the reasons why. Do you still want me to act for you? Bit of honesty and discussion at the start can save all sorts of hassle.

Money going missing - losing it, being stolen, giving it away but not wanting to tell you? Any ways of keeping it safe such as a home safe? But if he's asking you tn get large amounts out and genuinely has no idea where it's going, then either his faculties may not be all they could be, or potentially someone is taking advantage and maybe that's something you might want to look into a bit more, depending on what sums are involved.

BooJewels

elsien wrote: »

Mental CapacityAct, not MHA.
Code of practice available to download free online.
Further guidance on OFfice of Public Guardian.

Thanks elsien, I mentioned it [but mis-remembered as MHA myself] early in the thread, then just couldn't find it to post a link, as I was looking for entirely the wrong thing and for some reason couldn't find my own copy to get the proper title. This is it, see chapter 7 for LPA stuff