My ex has asked me to help falsify her HB claim

bflare

Due to concerns for my son's welfare I have taken full custody of my son from his mother & this is what my son wants too who is 12 years old. I stopped all child maintenance payments & put a claim in for child benefit as she was claiming it illegally. She has now received a letter saying that they have been informed that her circumstances have changed therefore she is no longer entitled to a 2 bed council house. Also by the looks of it they have stopped or reduced her UC as well as stopping her single person council tax reduction as she has someone living with her now. She was very angry & upset on the phone last week as she is saying that it is all my fault & she can no longer go through with an house exchange that she was planning because she is no longer entitled to a 2 bed property. She is going to fill some new forms out & say that our son stays with her 2 nights per week & she has asked me to confirm this if they ask.


Her reasoning is that our son may want to stay there in the future. At this moment in time he doesn't want to stay there & even if he did she would have to take me to court because I don't want my son staying there as I think it is extremely damaging for his emotional & mental health. Without going into too much detail she has a man living there who is on methadone & I suspect that she is taking drugs.


If the relevant housing department ask me to confirm the living situation that she has told them & I don't I can see her getting very upset as well as making my life hell. However, I do not feel comfortable lying for her.


Any advice please?

Penguin_

Just say no.

pmlindyloo

If it makes you feel any better...………………………

If your child lives with you only part of the week
If you share the care of your child with the child's other parent, your child will be treated as living with the parent who provides the child's main home. If your child spends equal amounts of time with both parents, they will be treated as living with the parent who claims Child Benefit for them. This may mean that you won't be allowed a bedroom for the child.

From Citizens Advice website

bflare

pmlindyloo wrote: »

If it makes you feel any better...………………………

If your child lives with you only part of the week
If you share the care of your child with the child's other parent, your child will be treated as living with the parent who provides the child's main home. If your child spends equal amounts of time with both parents, they will be treated as living with the parent who claims Child Benefit for them. This may mean that you won't be allowed a bedroom for the child.

From Citizens Advice website

Ah right so basically as I will be receiving the child benefit, although I still have not received the decision as of yet, she is not entitled to a bedroom for him anyway. So, whether she says he stays at hers 2 nights per week & asks me to confirm this is irrelevant?

Mojisola

bflare wrote: »

She is going to fill some new forms out & say that our son stays with her 2 nights per week & she has asked me to confirm this if they ask.

Her reasoning is that our son may want to stay there in the future. At this moment in time he doesn't want to stay there & even if he did she would have to take me to court because I don't want my son staying there as I think it is extremely damaging for his emotional & mental health.

So how would it look in court when you're fighting to prevent overnight visits and she produces paperwork showing you confirmed that your son was spending two nights a week with her?

bflare

Mojisola wrote: »

So how would it look in court when you're fighting to prevent overnight visits and she produces paperwork showing you confirmed that your son was spending two nights a week with her?

Yes! This is exactly what I was considering. I am refusing to let my son stay there & this could in theory go to court. If I lied for her & confirmed that he stayed there over night, this would jeopardise everything that I have been doing. I think I now have my answer & decision. I have to put the safety & wellbeing of my son first & lying for her would not be doing this. Thank you.

Pollycat

bflare wrote: »

Yes! This is exactly what I was considering. I am refusing to let my son stay there & this could in theory go to court. If I lied for her & confirmed that he stayed there over night, this would jeopardise everything that I have been doing. I think I now have my answer & decision. I have to put the safety & wellbeing of my son first & lying for her would not be doing this. Thank you.

Regardless of the safety and welfare of your son (which I agree is paramount), nobody should be considering lying to allow anyone to falsify benefits - whatever the circumstances.

Chrysalis

Don't lie, not only does it discredit you in the future such as e.g. court, but also its just wrong and not good for your child, as it would actually strengthen any case she puts forward for custody.

TELLIT01

Can you contact the council department yourself to explain the current situation? That way they would have all the relevant information with which to make a decision on her entitlement.

DCFC79

Just say no, if your found out you could be in trouble for being complicit.

bflare

Chrysalis wrote: »

Don't lie, not only does it discredit you in the future such as e.g. court, but also its just wrong and not good for your child, as it would actually strengthen any case she puts forward for custody.

Yes. I have done my best to bring my son up with an importance on honesty. I do not want to do anything that is going to jeopardise my son's welfare & it is also against my morals.