The hardest challenge yet

elantan

Part of our conversation last night was about the ten years weve just came through, a new decade awaits so it was nice to reminisce where weve been what weve learned and achieved and where we fancy heading.

We didnt know each other ten years ago, we met as couples in the glorious summer of possibilities that was 2014, it was the best of times, it was the worst and most painful of times.

10 years ago I was a 2nd year student at uni, studying a degree course I hated. I hated the course so much, yet I have so much to thank that time for. There are parts of myself I wasnt happy with, I would fly off the handle at people then curse myself for a) not being able to control myself and b) not know why I was so angry with these people

elantan

My course taught me why and I came to love and accept that part of myself, I also came to be able to control it.

my uni course also gave me the opportunity to go on placement, I had started being interested in sustainability, conservation, and self sufficiency, people in my class were being sent on placements that just didnt interest me at all, so I went and found my own placement and sorted it with the uni for me to go there. It opened up a whole new chapter in my life where I met wonderful friends and learned ( and still learning) so much.

But not even that was enough to make me stay, so I finished 2nd year and decided it wasnt for me.

I carried on working then my life changed again, I split up with OH for 3 months learned how I can do things on my own and looked forward.

we got burgled a project i worked on got petrol bombed and two years of stress with uni, OH, burglaries, car accidents, petrol bombings etc culminated in me having a TIA.

it was time to slow down and deal with lifes stressors there and then and not bottle them up till my health suffered. so more learning takes place and I'm better now. I still tend to be left with a lot of stress but I'm better at recognising when it's getting tio much and dealing with it. ( although there is always room for improvement)

boultdj

You've been through a lot and like you said yourself your still learning, which is all way's a good thing, even if you don't like what you learn it will come in handy at some time in your life, even if it's just to tell other people and it help's them out.

elantan

I remember one night whilst on night shift being left an utterly stupid request from.the day shift and thinking nah the line has been crossed, it was time for me to move on ( the original reason I went to uni was to change jobs ... but that altered when I left)

I couldnt think what I wanted to do, so chatted with a friend and she recommended her career. I had been the one to give her a reference and had more experience than her, but I didnt fancy the job, however, my desperation to get away from my then work situation forced me to rethink things, and I am so glad I did.

the new year of 2014 saw me applying to go back to uni, something I swore I would never do. I got in, this time Oh and I decided I wasnt going to hold down two jobs and study, my health was going to be more important, so we literally cut everything to the bone, tv licence gone, cable TV everything gone, house phone gone, mobiles, cheapest deal we could get, the internet was the only treat we had and that was to help me study, no holidays for 3 years unless it was in a tent, no meals out .... nothing, we would survive on a small income from.the course I was on maybe 24 hours per month of me working and Oh wage

that obviously didnt work, we quickly realised we needed our holidays ( and take aways) we were used to them, and whilst camping was something we loved to do, it was only lovely when we had the weather, we spent an utterly miserable midge bitten night in fortwilliam soaked to the skin and gave up and came home, so a rethink was had, eventually we used the last of our savings and bought a very cheap caravan.

Our lives changed again, we went exploring, visited places we had never even thought of, we joined historic Scotland and the national trust and went for days out with soggy sandwiches and home made soup. We climed hills we took up Kayaking we started living the life we wanted. I passed my degree and got my dream job.

as a nation we became politically aware, I was no longer the geek, I grew up loving politics but no one wanted to talk politics so I learned and debated with few. 2014 arrived on the scene and suddenly Scotland discussed politics, people suddenly became interested in what we wanted as a country, what we thought of economics, we had opinions, I reckon if the people of Scotland had sat a degree in politics that year we wouldve all passed. I met people who have became life long friends. Man you couldnt go to the shop for a pint of milk but it was talked about.

And to some extent it still is here, the question hasn't went away, the debates still happen the future yet to materialise.

And then in 2016 the rest of the UK seemed to be abuzz with politics, but it was a different wave sweeping across the UK, it was one i didnt recognise, so i stayed out of it, and after 2014 well tbh i had all but given up anyway.

since 2016 the UK has underwent so much change, and yet no change either


It's been a tumultuous ten years both on a personal level and in a national level ...

now to plan for the next ten . maybe a calmer quieter one would be handy ������

elantan

If you had told me in 2010 that by 2020 I would have a degree in a totally different subject to what I was studying at the time, that I would be doing the job I currently am, that I would split up and get back together with OH, that I would have a TIA, that we would pay our mortgage off, have savings, have a caravan, walk the WHW ( something I have wanted to do for over 30 years) have an independence referendum

i genuinely wouldve laughed at you ...

and yet here we are, all that and more has happened

its exciting to be alive I reckon

so what's happened in your ten years ?

p.s sorry it was so many posts, I was out waiting for a lift due to getting a blister whilst walking ... a blister sheesh I thought they were a thing of my past... anyway wasnt great internet connection so sent it all a bit at a time

elantan

boultdj wrote: »

You've been through a lot and like you said yourself your still learning, which is all way's a good thing, even if you don't like what you learn it will come in handy at some time in your life, even if it's just to tell other people and it help's them out.

Absolutely, communities like this can be great for all of us to learn and share and grow

lessonlearned

Elantan.....your last few posts have been so interesting. You have been through so much but have also gone on to achieve great things too. And you are so right, it is exciting to be alive. So many are denied the privelege and die far too young.

It has been quite a decade for me too. In fact, like you, I have spent the last couple of days reflecting. I have also been drawing up my master Plan for next decade....

This time 10 years ago I was caring for my terminally ill husband. It was a dreadful time for me......he was only in his early 50s but he was slowly dying. At the same time I was trying to oversee my parents care. It was a nightmare and I was run ragged, making myself ill in the process. I was without any income and without any chance of getting a job. I was £30k in debt and felt I was standing staring into the abyss.

My husband died in 2014, my mum just 7 months later in the spring of 2015, followed by my father in December 2016. So 3 deaths in 2 and a half years, dealing with their estates, clearing and selling two family homes, and then 4 house moves for me, a couple of car crashes and trying to recover my health. But I survived and lived to tell the tale.

On a more positive note my two sons met their princesses and I now have a grandson. I have travelled a bit, and fulfilled a lifelong ambition to visit the Amazon.

I'm now putting "widowhood" firmly behind me and embracing life as a singleton, planning my next decade and looking forward to a life filled with the warmth of my family and friends and some new adventures along the way.

Heres to 2020 and the next decade. .:beer: that should be champagne......:rotfl:

elantan

Hey Lesson,

you've also been through such tumultuous times over the last 10 years, I imagine if someone had said to you in 2010 not only would you come through it, you would be stronger have grandkids and visit the amazon, like me you probably wouldve laughed ... but you did, and whilst I cant even begin to imagine the pain you've been through I'm sure your probably a much stronger take no crap, live life person through it.

I totally agree so so many people tragically never get to my age (47) so many people have life harder than me and are in situations they cant control than me, in some ways I feel a responsibility to ensure I ( as much as I can) live a good life.

I feel theres a lot of living for us both to do yet, I'm not sure about you but I reckon its gonna be some adventure down paths and avenues I never wouldve thought possible.

I'm looking forward to it ... it's always better with good company though

lessonlearned

Oh yes...prior to my husband's illness.I would indeed have laughed in your face. I always considered myself something of a butterfly and frankly a bit of an airhead.....

I never thought I would grow a backbone of steel but I did.

I am not a person of faith but I strongly believe in the strength of the human spirit to endure and thrive. I believe we all have hidden depths, it's just that not all of us are tested.

When my back was to the wall I came out fighting.

Now for the next decade. Bring it on.......yep, there's still a lot of living to be done.

In the words of Al Johnson "you ain't seen nuthin yet"......:rotfl:

Wednesday2000

elantan wrote: »

as a nation we became politically aware, I was no longer the geek, I grew up loving politics but no one wanted to talk politics so I learned and debated with few. 2014 arrived on the scene and suddenly Scotland discussed politics, people suddenly became interested in what we wanted as a country, what we thought of economics, we had opinions, I reckon if the people of Scotland had sat a degree in politics that year we wouldve all passed. I met people who have became life long friends. Man you couldnt go to the shop for a pint of milk but it was talked about.

And to some extent it still is here, the question hasn't went away, the debates still happen the future yet to materialise.

And then in 2016 the rest of the UK seemed to be abuzz with politics, but it was a different wave sweeping across the UK, it was one i didnt recognise, so i stayed out of it, and after 2014 well tbh i had all but given up anyway.

since 2016 the UK has underwent so much change, and yet no change either


It's been a tumultuous ten years both on a personal level and in a national level ...

now to plan for the next ten . maybe a calmer quieter one would be handy ������

That is really fascinating.:)