What has happened to the good old days of MSE?

595 Posts
What happened to the good old days of MSE forum? It used to be such a nice place with great advice, open minded & supportive people and replies, but now many of the nice posters have disappeared & certain parts of the forum are full posters who are so angry that no one can say anything without being called names or insults. Many people here seem incapable of offering their opinion without making presumptions or adding an unnecessary insult to anyone who disagrees with them.
As the internet gets older online forums tend toward having specific cliques of members but unless we're trying to scare away new members, isn't it a good idea to be a little bit diplomatic or open minded like in the old days of the forum?
Latest example:
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=6071008
Although I'm not holding my breath, it would be so great to get back to the old supportive style the forum had back in the day. I've seen people simply posting about a bad / funny day they had, and then the same members keep coming back to make fun of them & use it as an opportunity to pick apart their story instead of offering anything constructive. Even a sympathetic joke can be constructive. I see it too often on MSE, I don't come on here that often anymore for this reason, I know a number of people who avoid the forum and I'm sure many others feel the same way.
There are times when someone needs to be told their thinking is incorrect, but it just seems so many members are doing it & in such a personal way, for the sake of it. It isn't conducive to a positive or inclusive forum environment.
As the internet gets older online forums tend toward having specific cliques of members but unless we're trying to scare away new members, isn't it a good idea to be a little bit diplomatic or open minded like in the old days of the forum?
Latest example:
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=6071008
Although I'm not holding my breath, it would be so great to get back to the old supportive style the forum had back in the day. I've seen people simply posting about a bad / funny day they had, and then the same members keep coming back to make fun of them & use it as an opportunity to pick apart their story instead of offering anything constructive. Even a sympathetic joke can be constructive. I see it too often on MSE, I don't come on here that often anymore for this reason, I know a number of people who avoid the forum and I'm sure many others feel the same way.
There are times when someone needs to be told their thinking is incorrect, but it just seems so many members are doing it & in such a personal way, for the sake of it. It isn't conducive to a positive or inclusive forum environment.
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From what I've seen most posters DO give new OP's the benefit of the doubt, but it soon becomes apparent that the OP isn't listening, or isn't engaging, and so "diplomacy" soon goes out the window. They then get told a spade's a spade....flounce soon ensues!
It's a two way street, and not always the current members fault. (although there are a few that "take no prisoners" from the very first post)
As with all things in life, you have to have a pretty thick skin, and not be easily offended. Forums are not a "safe space" and neither should they be, as sometimes people do need to be told the hard truths, even if they don't like them. Nothing to be gained by blowing sunshine up their ****'s !!!
** Edit - I hadn't read the linked thread before I typed the above, I now have. You wonder why you got so many "negative" answers when you're discussing the "legalities" of £1 !! Posters are mostly winding you up, it looks to me....and it appears to have worked!!! ***
I did make a suggestion as to how mse could be improved but I can't even repeat it as I got a yellow card within hours for doing so.
Sadly with the spread of social(?) media the internet is not the force for good it once was.
The only way this particular swamp can be drained is to discontinue the forums, and restart them with much more proactive moderation, and stricter criteria for becoming a forum member. At the moment, anyone can sign up with multiple identities and use these forums as their personal playground pretty much unhindered, venting their spleen on anyone who doesn't see life through the same twisted lens as they do.
Given the forums will probably not be closed down, all you can do is report people every time you see a post which breaks one of the rules.
If people respond in an aggressive way to anything you post ignore them. These unhappy people thrive on the attention and love to play wind-up games, so don't give them the satisfaction.