My wife is in debt for the 2nd time, and leaving.

onwards&upwards

Boomerang_Boy wrote: »

However, we have a 13 year old son. I want his mother to be financially ok for his sake. It can't be healthy for him if his mam is stressed or depressed or skint.

That’s very admirable, but unfortunately you wanting her to sort her finances out won’t do it. She has to want to and to be genuinely ready to make the changes, if she isn’t it doesn’t matter what you do or want.

Boomerang_Boy

Well, I tried talking about it this morning and was shut down. So I am going to take on board the advice given here. Get her name off everything and concentrate on my own financial stability. My son will probably want to stay with me too.

SusieT

Boomerang_Boy wrote: »

Well, I tried talking about it this morning and was shut down. So I am going to take on board the advice given here. Get her name off everything and concentrate on my own financial stability. My son will probably want to stay with me too.

I think that would be the best thing to do, you have sorted her out once and it has not changed her ways, now sadly she is not only back in debt but also refusing help. If your son wants to live with you it would save you worrying about him, and your financials will all be in order.

couriervanman

Help her out this time.........and its a fair bet in 3 years time you'll be doing the same again

webnibbler

As others have mention change any joint accounts and separate your income and assets where possible.

Boomerang_Boy wrote: »

Our relationship has broken down over the last few years and things have come to a head, she is in the process of moving out.

Will either of you be seeking a divorce? Is she likely to start this process? If so you may want to get legal advice as initiating a divorce could possibly lead to a court deciding a split of assets and property. See this gov.uk page

D_M_E

Sounds like it will not be an amicable parting.

Consider getting yourself a CIFAS protective marker - since she has been and is being secretive about debt issues she could use your details to apply for loans and such like in your name, you never know.

tallyhoh

Has she given a reason for being in debt?

enthusiasticsaver

I would also advise you check on Credit Karma (previously Noddle) to see if there are any surprises on there in case she has taken out credit in your name.

Spentalot

She really needs to WANT to sort this out herself. Otherwise there is nothing you can do.
Be careful you don't end up being her enabler (by paying or contributing to paying the debt off - she will just run up more debts).
Others have touched on it and I agree that your priority really needs to be your own financial situation and caring for your son.

Xenon

Your wife is an adult who made her choice(s) - let her face the problems/consequences that come with it.

Look after yourself and your son - get on with the rest of your life.