Regret buying a house at 28 - what do I do?

phillw

pineapplepink wrote: »

I've thought about it a lot and would love nothing more than to see the world by working abroad. I have a friend who offered me work in Thailand where the cost to rent is cheap, and if I didn't have my mortgage I'd have booked a flight out in a heartbeat.

Probably a good thing you can't, you need to think carefully about what you actually want.

If your head is full of everything being fun and exciting in other countries, then there is the very real danger that when the newness rubs off that you could find yourself in the same position but in a different country and no ability to return home independently.

Have you asked virgin what they think your LTV is? If you've been in the property for a while then they may have a different idea of what the Value is. Do you have any relatives that could loan you the money to get the LTV low enough?

I wish you luck

Jamesdcooper

Some lenders do allow you to rent out your home for a short time but you would have to get their permission to do so. I have that option with my lender. It keeps you on your existing residential mortgage product so you wouldn’t need to go down the BTL route but it is likely to only be for a short time. It might give you time to decide what you want to do rather than rushing and regretting.

morgy

Hi, I am from the Netherlands and we indeed rent mostly. I always rented cause for exactly the reason you have given: I didn't want to be tied to a country or place and be able to move whenever, where ever I wanted. This suited me really well and I just bought my first house, here in the UK, being 48 years old - time to settle down


I really don't understand that obsession with owning a house. Why on earth you would want to commit to something of that magnitude at such a young age is really beyond me. But of course each to their own.



So to answer your question: I would sell it and go where ever the wind takes you. Buy a house when you really want to settle down. Have a great time and good luck!

kdotdotdotdot

Firstly, have you spoken to your mortgage holder about the possibility of changing it so you could let it out?

Secondly, the main words I focused on in your first post was the statement that you're feeling depressed. I appreciate it's often just an expression, but it's not a state of mind to make life-changing decisions. If you're truly feeling down, it's worthwhile chatting to a doctor and seeing if you can get counselling. It helps to have someone else to talk through your feelings and finding out what's really wrong.

Thirdly, I totally understand your desire to live abroad. I've just moved back to the UK after 20 years. Owning property is a very British thing to want to do, and if I were you, I'd find it very hard to sell up and move abroad without the security of a home to come back. To be clear, I didn't own property and am only now buying my first home and I've regretted not having bought earlier.

Finally, I know from personal experience that living abroad isn't easy. You simply exchange one set of problems for a completely new set of problems, which will be every bit as tiresome as the ones you have, just newer and different. After two decades living in seven countries I can tell you that not everyone thrives living abroad. The biggest differentiator that I can see between successfully moving abroad and not is the reason for the move, and that's why I'm posting: the people I see who are moving to leave something behind generally don't do as well as the people who move because they're moving to something better for them. It sounds from your post that you're focusing on the whole 'escaping from being tied down' rather than on what you'd be escaping to.

When you're in a happier frame of mind, actually plan your future. See what skills you already have and what skills you may need to get a decent job abroad and set your mind towards that. Read up about the advantages and disadvantages about becoming a landlord, and if you can handle it, see what you can do about changing your mortgage so you can rent it out or if you can't then be confident in selling up. It won't happen instantly, but no good life-changing decisions are taken overnight (or even in three days ).

There's nothing to stop you from meeting the love of your life while living abroad, and raising children in another country, so travelling isn't something you have to do right now, while you're young and single. What I'm saying is please don't rush into a decision when you're feeling the back at work blues.

If you hate your job, then change it; it's easier to get a new job here in the UK than abroad. Otherwise, talk to your bank about possible transfer options. Or, if you enjoyed volunteering, then talk to various charities about working with them abroad (paid). Or consider a TEFL course if you'd like to teach. Would you want to retrain as a nanny? Cruise ships (certainly not my dream job!) are always looking for staff who are very hard working. Alternatively, look online for expat forums in the countries you'd like to work and see what they suggest for finding work with your qualifications and skills.

FWIW, bar work in Thailand is awful and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. Dodgy people and dodgy environments. Any job where you don't get a work-visa from the government means you're working illegally.

S_CKate

Best of both worlds - write to your lender and ask them for permission to let out your house due to a change in circumstances. They can refuse but if you explain that you are wanting to go away for a year to work abroad or even two years then they may grant you permission to do so. There is an annual admin fee but you should be able to cover it with the rent.

phillw

BBH123 wrote: »

Travelling and working to live on peanuts in your 20's is very appealing, the same in your 50's is not.

Depends on if you have a house earning you an income while you're off traveling the world, surely?

I wish I'd bought in my 20's I'd have three houses instead of one.

lookstraightahead

morgy wrote: »

Hi, I am from the Netherlands and we indeed rent mostly. I always rented cause for exactly the reason you have given: I didn't want to be tied to a country or place and be able to move whenever, where ever I wanted. This suited me really well and I just bought my first house, here in the UK, being 48 years old - time to settle down


I really don't understand that obsession with owning a house. Why on earth you would want to commit to something of that magnitude at such a young age is really beyond me. But of course each to their own.



So to answer your question: I would sell it and go where ever the wind takes you. Buy a house when you really want to settle down. Have a great time and good luck!

I agree with this. Yes you have to think like a grown up and make sure you have money, but the U.K. really does have an unhealthy obsession with house ownership. And the type of car they drive. When did stuff become more of a security than people?

Zandoni

trailingspouse wrote: »

Never compare your inside to other people's outside.



They may have looked like they were having a good time, with not a care in the world - but I bet some of them were thinking 'Wow, look at pineapple, she's really got her life sorted, owns her own house already, wish I could afford to do that'.

Mutton_Geoff wrote: »

I would be very careful stepping off "the ladder" in the UK. It's a very hard place to get back into and you have already done the hard work.


Bar promotion etc in Asia is probably one of the worst jobs I can think of. You'll have no long term security and you will be working for and amongst a lot of criminal gangs. I have friends that have been in the nightclub industry in Asia for over 30 years and it is extremely competitive such that I don't think you can make anything other than pocket money despite what your friend tells you.


Have you considered a regular UK job that involves travel? This is what I did in my 20's onward (and to this day). I get all of the security of a UK home but get to see the world on a regular basis. It could be you're just fed up with your current postion. Running away to a foreign country where the grass appears greener may not be the solution and could easily cause your whole life to take an irreversible turn you will come to regret in later years.

Two brilliant bits of advice.

deFoix

If you want to work overseas I would recommend doing so via a bona fide job placement by your company (or another company). Let them handle the visas, flights, taxes, accommodation etc. If you look around there are plenty of companies that offer such roles. I would strongly advise against just turning up in some place and doing low-wage insecure work to get by. Maybe that can work in a booming economy e.g. China 10 years ago but I’m not so sure it’s a recipe for success now.

Hutch100uk

My ex and I cashed in on the property boom 13/14 years ago and sold up and went travelling. I don't regret it but we then found ourselves in a position where we couldn't buy when we returned because property prices went through the roof and getting a mortgage wasn't as easy as it used to be. We spent years wasting money on rent and when we did finally buy we had to almost beg, borrow and steal the deposit.
I would think carefully about selling up as you may never get back on the ladder again. If you can find a way to get around the letting, I would definitely try that first.